PDA

View Full Version : Re: When things go too far


Wendy Marsden
July 19th 03, 06:32 AM
karen > wrote:
> I was wondering if french kissing a 5 year old boy by his step-mother is
> sexual abuse. Please help me and let me know. I'm the mother.

I'd say they are playing around. My four year old kisses me fiercely -
it's a game, not sexual foreplay. (Note - I don't use tongue, but he
sometimes licks my face when he's playing puppy-dog.)

My guess is that you want to hate the woman. Be very, very careful before
you start making accusations that will ruin a person's life. My
understanding is that mothers who accuse the fathers of sexual misconduct
with the children are MORE likely to lose custody.

Wendy

Banty
July 19th 03, 01:39 PM
In article >, "karen" says...
>
>I was wondering if french kissing a 5 year old boy by his step-mother is
>sexual abuse. Please help me and let me know. I'm the mother.


Yanno, when I was in my 20s, I knew five couples with young kids who divorced.

All five of the non-custodial parents - ALL FIVE OF THEM, ALL FIVE OF THEM! -
told others that the custodial parent and/or new partner of the custodial parent
of sexually abused the kids. I believed - - oh, about - - NONE - - of them,
knowing personally about the situations.

In the twenty years since then, I find that I know few people who got divorced
during my decades-long friendships. I think it's because I learned to detect a
certain flighty selfishness in a lot of the folks who eventually go down that
path and don't form connections with them.

I'm not saying that what you say is necessarily false. But it's so highly
unlikely that a woman would be french-kissing a 5 year old boy, and so DAMN
COMMON that ex's accuse the child's new situation of being abusive, that I just
get sick and tired of reading this stuff.

But- I'm not the one you worry about, of course, me being some stranger on
USENET. But I can assure you that any judge and any arbitor and just about
anyone involved in family court (except the the lawyers), is damn sick and tired
of it too.

So before you take any steps in this direction, look yourself in the mirror and
really think about that incident somebody told you about, or that affectionate
roughhousing that you saw from a distance - WHATEVER is was (unless you want
folks to believe that a woman went about sexual acitivity with her stepchild in
the witnessing presence of the birthmother), and tell yourself out loud to that
image in the mirror that you are certain that a stepmother tongue-kisses a five
year old boy in a sexual way. Al least start there - because evidently that
person will be the LEAST hard to convince of those you'll have to convince if
you go forward with this.

Are you DAMN SURE of this accusation??

Banty

karen
July 19th 03, 06:56 PM
"Banty" > wrote in message
...
> In article >, "karen" says...
> >
> >I was wondering if french kissing a 5 year old boy by his step-mother is
> >sexual abuse. Please help me and let me know. I'm the mother.
>
>
> Yanno, when I was in my 20s, I knew five couples with young kids who
divorced.
>
> All five of the non-custodial parents - ALL FIVE OF THEM, ALL FIVE OF
THEM! -
> told others that the custodial parent and/or new partner of the custodial
parent
> of sexually abused the kids. I believed - - oh, about - - NONE - - of
them,
> knowing personally about the situations.
>
> In the twenty years since then, I find that I know few people who got
divorced
> during my decades-long friendships. I think it's because I learned to
detect a
> certain flighty selfishness in a lot of the folks who eventually go down
that
> path and don't form connections with them.
>
> I'm not saying that what you say is necessarily false. But it's so highly
> unlikely that a woman would be french-kissing a 5 year old boy, and so
DAMN
> COMMON that ex's accuse the child's new situation of being abusive, that I
just
> get sick and tired of reading this stuff.
>
> But- I'm not the one you worry about, of course, me being some stranger on
> USENET. But I can assure you that any judge and any arbitor and just
about
> anyone involved in family court (except the the lawyers), is damn sick and
tired
> of it too.
>
> So before you take any steps in this direction, look yourself in the
mirror and
> really think about that incident somebody told you about, or that
affectionate
> roughhousing that you saw from a distance - WHATEVER is was (unless you
want
> folks to believe that a woman went about sexual acitivity with her
stepchild in
> the witnessing presence of the birthmother), and tell yourself out loud to
that
> image in the mirror that you are certain that a stepmother tongue-kisses
a five
> year old boy in a sexual way. Al least start there - because evidently
that
> person will be the LEAST hard to convince of those you'll have to convince
if
> you go forward with this.
>
> Are you DAMN SURE of this accusation??
>
> Banty


Actually the truth is even worse. I'm was afraid of my ex and also I
wasn't sure if tongue kissing was something to worry about. The truth is my
son wanted to tongue kiss with me on several occasions and I told him no and
he said he and his step-mother did it. My daughter said it was true and
disgusted her. I thought that it was better to leave well enough alone but
now I'm wondering if I've done my duty as a parent to ignore this issue.
There are no accusations. Actually he had me investigated by a children's
lawyer and I never said anything because I was so afraid of him. I was sure
no one would believe me if I said anything. He abused me until I had a
nervous breakdown, hence the investigation. I'm sure if I say half the stuff
I could I would be told I was paranoid or lying, so I've said nothing so
far. But I want the best for my kids. I'm not as afraid of him now. I'm more
focused on what's best for them. Like I said, I'm not even sure if it is
sexual or what, but if it is, I have a duty as a parent to report it, and my
post on the net was to ask you, the people, if it is sexual.


---
Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free.
Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com).
Version: 6.0.497 / Virus Database: 296 - Release Date: 04/07/03

R. Steve Walz
July 20th 03, 04:11 AM
karen wrote:
>
> "Banty" > wrote in message
> ...
> > In article >, "karen" says...
> > >
> > >I was wondering if french kissing a 5 year old boy by his step-mother is
> > >sexual abuse. Please help me and let me know. I'm the mother.
> >
> >
> > Yanno, when I was in my 20s, I knew five couples with young kids who
> divorced.
> >
> > All five of the non-custodial parents - ALL FIVE OF THEM, ALL FIVE OF
> THEM! -
> > told others that the custodial parent and/or new partner of the custodial
> parent
> > of sexually abused the kids. I believed - - oh, about - - NONE - - of
> them,
> > knowing personally about the situations.
> >
> > In the twenty years since then, I find that I know few people who got
> divorced
> > during my decades-long friendships. I think it's because I learned to
> detect a
> > certain flighty selfishness in a lot of the folks who eventually go down
> that
> > path and don't form connections with them.
> >
> > I'm not saying that what you say is necessarily false. But it's so highly
> > unlikely that a woman would be french-kissing a 5 year old boy, and so
> DAMN
> > COMMON that ex's accuse the child's new situation of being abusive, that I
> just
> > get sick and tired of reading this stuff.
> >
> > But- I'm not the one you worry about, of course, me being some stranger on
> > USENET. But I can assure you that any judge and any arbitor and just
> about
> > anyone involved in family court (except the the lawyers), is damn sick and
> tired
> > of it too.
> >
> > So before you take any steps in this direction, look yourself in the
> mirror and
> > really think about that incident somebody told you about, or that
> affectionate
> > roughhousing that you saw from a distance - WHATEVER is was (unless you
> want
> > folks to believe that a woman went about sexual acitivity with her
> stepchild in
> > the witnessing presence of the birthmother), and tell yourself out loud to
> that
> > image in the mirror that you are certain that a stepmother tongue-kisses
> a five
> > year old boy in a sexual way. Al least start there - because evidently
> that
> > person will be the LEAST hard to convince of those you'll have to convince
> if
> > you go forward with this.
> >
> > Are you DAMN SURE of this accusation??
> >
> > Banty
>
> Actually the truth is even worse. I'm was afraid of my ex and also I
> wasn't sure if tongue kissing was something to worry about. The truth is my
> son wanted to tongue kiss with me on several occasions and I told him no and
> he said he and his step-mother did it. My daughter said it was true and
> disgusted her. I thought that it was better to leave well enough alone but
> now I'm wondering if I've done my duty as a parent to ignore this issue.
> There are no accusations. Actually he had me investigated by a children's
> lawyer and I never said anything because I was so afraid of him. I was sure
> no one would believe me if I said anything. He abused me until I had a
> nervous breakdown, hence the investigation. I'm sure if I say half the stuff
> I could I would be told I was paranoid or lying, so I've said nothing so
> far. But I want the best for my kids. I'm not as afraid of him now. I'm more
> focused on what's best for them. Like I said, I'm not even sure if it is
> sexual or what, but if it is, I have a duty as a parent to report it, and my
> post on the net was to ask you, the people, if it is sexual.
--------------
Oh stop it!! When people become paranoid about kissing, you need to
say they're nuts. In fact whenever people get all twisted about
something that the kids, when asked, happen to LIKE (or they wouldn't
do it) you have to come to understand that it is that SICK SICK
sexually SICK part of western culture is headed down a really sick
kind of s******ing stupid blind alley that it should JERK itself out
of by the short hairs and just let the KIDS decide what THEY like,
and otherwise leave them the **** alone!

If kids want to practice tongue kissing they STILL won't have any more
colds than off doorknobs. And it doesn't hurt them. And if they want
to fool with each other sexually, they'll simply be saner, happier and
better informed and emotionally wired up than the rest of YOU poor
abused children who were slapped and dishonored for YOUR curitosity!

Kids are the way in which Love and Fun and Faith come into the world!

If you don't trust your adult peers, at least trust kids and give
THEM what THEY want. They won't want anything evil if you've not
been evil to them, so have faith in that as a comsic principle or
else you're a lost soul! Sex isn't evil and wrong, but YOU are if
you even THINK **** like thar!!

Jeezzus **** on a stick!
Stand outside your culture and look at yourselves, for Gawd's sake!
Steve

R. Steve Walz
July 20th 03, 05:05 AM
Duncan wrote:
>
> On 19 Jul 2003, "R. Steve Walz" > wrote in
> :
>
> > karen wrote:
> >>
> >> "Banty" > wrote in message
> >> ...
> >> > In article >, "karen"
> >> > says...
> >> > >
> >> > >I was wondering if french kissing a 5 year old boy by his
> >> > >step-mother is sexual abuse. Please help me and let me know. I'm
> >> > >the mother.
> >> >
> >> >
> >> > Yanno, when I was in my 20s, I knew five couples with young kids
> >> > who
> >> divorced.
> >> >
> >> > All five of the non-custodial parents - ALL FIVE OF THEM, ALL FIVE
> >> > OF
> >> THEM! -
> >> > told others that the custodial parent and/or new partner of the
> >> > custodial
> >> parent
> >> > of sexually abused the kids. I believed - - oh, about - - NONE -
> >> > - of
> >> them,
> >> > knowing personally about the situations.
> >> >
> >> > In the twenty years since then, I find that I know few people who
> >> > got
> >> divorced
> >> > during my decades-long friendships. I think it's because I learned
> >> > to
> >> detect a
> >> > certain flighty selfishness in a lot of the folks who eventually go
> >> > down
> >> that
> >> > path and don't form connections with them.
> >> >
> >> > I'm not saying that what you say is necessarily false. But it's so
> >> > highly unlikely that a woman would be french-kissing a 5 year old
> >> > boy, and so
> >> DAMN
> >> > COMMON that ex's accuse the child's new situation of being abusive,
> >> > that I
> >> just
> >> > get sick and tired of reading this stuff.
> >> >
> >> > But- I'm not the one you worry about, of course, me being some
> >> > stranger on USENET. But I can assure you that any judge and any
> >> > arbitor and just
> >> about
> >> > anyone involved in family court (except the the lawyers), is damn
> >> > sick and
> >> tired
> >> > of it too.
> >> >
> >> > So before you take any steps in this direction, look yourself in
> >> > the
> >> mirror and
> >> > really think about that incident somebody told you about, or that
> >> affectionate
> >> > roughhousing that you saw from a distance - WHATEVER is was (unless
> >> > you
> >> want
> >> > folks to believe that a woman went about sexual acitivity with her
> >> stepchild in
> >> > the witnessing presence of the birthmother), and tell yourself out
> >> > loud to
> >> that
> >> > image in the mirror that you are certain that a stepmother
> >> > tongue-kisses
> >> a five
> >> > year old boy in a sexual way. Al least start there - because
> >> > evidently
> >> that
> >> > person will be the LEAST hard to convince of those you'll have to
> >> > convince
> >> if
> >> > you go forward with this.
> >> >
> >> > Are you DAMN SURE of this accusation??
> >> >
> >> > Banty
> >>
> >> Actually the truth is even worse. I'm was afraid of my ex and also
> >> I wasn't sure if tongue kissing was something to worry about. The
> >> truth is my son wanted to tongue kiss with me on several occasions
> >> and I told him no and he said he and his step-mother did it. My
> >> daughter said it was true and disgusted her. I thought that it was
> >> better to leave well enough alone but now I'm wondering if I've done
> >> my duty as a parent to ignore this issue. There are no accusations.
> >> Actually he had me investigated by a children's lawyer and I never
> >> said anything because I was so afraid of him. I was sure no one would
> >> believe me if I said anything. He abused me until I had a nervous
> >> breakdown, hence the investigation. I'm sure if I say half the stuff
> >> I could I would be told I was paranoid or lying, so I've said nothing
> >> so far. But I want the best for my kids. I'm not as afraid of him
> >> now. I'm more focused on what's best for them. Like I said, I'm not
> >> even sure if it is sexual or what, but if it is, I have a duty as a
> >> parent to report it, and my post on the net was to ask you, the
> >> people, if it is sexual.
> > --------------
> > Oh stop it!! When people become paranoid about kissing, you need to
> > say they're nuts. In fact whenever people get all twisted about
> > something that the kids, when asked, happen to LIKE (or they wouldn't
> > do it) you have to come to understand that it is that SICK SICK
> > sexually SICK part of western culture is headed down a really sick
> > kind of s******ing stupid blind alley that it should JERK itself out
> > of by the short hairs and just let the KIDS decide what THEY like,
> > and otherwise leave them the **** alone!
> >
> > If kids want to practice tongue kissing they STILL won't have any more
> > colds than off doorknobs. And it doesn't hurt them. And if they want
> > to fool with each other sexually, they'll simply be saner, happier and
> > better informed and emotionally wired up than the rest of YOU poor
> > abused children who were slapped and dishonored for YOUR curitosity!
> >
> > Kids are the way in which Love and Fun and Faith come into the world!
> >
> > If you don't trust your adult peers, at least trust kids and give
> > THEM what THEY want. They won't want anything evil if you've not
> > been evil to them, so have faith in that as a comsic principle or
> > else you're a lost soul! Sex isn't evil and wrong, but YOU are if
> > you even THINK **** like thar!!
> >
> > Jeezzus **** on a stick!
> > Stand outside your culture and look at yourselves, for Gawd's sake!
> > Steve
>
> Pedo.
---------------
No, you ****head. I defend children's right to what THEY want, I have
NO delusion that what they want is ME, nor do I have a need for THEM!
Steve

Banty
July 20th 03, 01:48 PM
In article <b1pSa.102056$ye4.74972@sccrnsc01>, "Dizzysmamma" says...
>
>
>"Nan" > wrote in message
...
>> On Sun, 20 Jul 2003 02:13:17 GMT, Duncan
>> > wrote:
>>
>> >Jealous much?
>>
>> troll much?
>>
>> Nan
>>
>You distract him on the bridge with fluffy hugs and tim tams and I'll get
>the Goat Brothers. ;o)

I always knew those DAMN TIM TAMS were only fit for trolls! ;-)

Banty

Dizzysmamma
July 20th 03, 03:04 PM
"Banty" > wrote in message
...
> In article <b1pSa.102056$ye4.74972@sccrnsc01>, "Dizzysmamma" says...
> >
> >
> >"Nan" > wrote in message
> ...
> >> On Sun, 20 Jul 2003 02:13:17 GMT, Duncan
> >> > wrote:
> >>
> >> >Jealous much?
> >>
> >> troll much?
> >>
> >> Nan
> >>
> >You distract him on the bridge with fluffy hugs and tim tams and I'll get
> >the Goat Brothers. ;o)
>
> I always knew those DAMN TIM TAMS were only fit for trolls! ;-)
>
> Banty
>
Hey they work almost 100% of the time as a troll repellant. /looks around
It may be time for you all to start throwing some around.

Angela

Banty
July 20th 03, 03:14 PM
In article >, Nan says...
>
>On Sun, 20 Jul 2003 04:38:31 GMT, "Dizzysmamma" >
>wrote:
>
>>
>>"Nan" > wrote in message
...
>>> On Sun, 20 Jul 2003 02:13:17 GMT, Duncan
>>> > wrote:
>>>
>>> >Jealous much?
>>>
>>> troll much?
>>>
>>> Nan
>>>
>>You distract him on the bridge with fluffy hugs and tim tams and I'll get
>>the Goat Brothers. ;o)
>>
>>Angela
>
>Nope, I'm not sharing my TIM TAMS with that troll and you can't make
>me!!
>
>Nan
>


You got the capitalization right, but forgot the qualifier..

that's DAMN TIM TAMS.

Banty
July 20th 03, 05:06 PM
In article >, Nan says...
>
>On Sun, 20 Jul 2003 14:04:03 GMT, "Dizzysmamma" >
>wrote:
>
>>
>>"Banty" > wrote in message
...
>>> In article <b1pSa.102056$ye4.74972@sccrnsc01>, "Dizzysmamma" says...
>>> >
>>> >
>>> >"Nan" > wrote in message
>>> ...
>>> >> On Sun, 20 Jul 2003 02:13:17 GMT, Duncan
>>> >> > wrote:
>>> >>
>>> >> >Jealous much?
>>> >>
>>> >> troll much?
>>> >>
>>> >> Nan
>>> >>
>>> >You distract him on the bridge with fluffy hugs and tim tams and I'll get
>>> >the Goat Brothers. ;o)
>>>
>>> I always knew those DAMN TIM TAMS were only fit for trolls! ;-)
>>>
>>> Banty
>>>
>>Hey they work almost 100% of the time as a troll repellant. /looks around
>>It may be time for you all to start throwing some around.
>>
>>Angela
>
>Is OFT around???
>
>Nan <G>
>


Are Tim Tams Kosher?

Banty

Dizzysmamma
July 20th 03, 05:21 PM
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Duncan}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} }}}}}}}}}}}}}

Banty
July 20th 03, 06:07 PM
In article >,
says...
>
>First kosher Tim Tams roll off Arnott’s production line

Well, there you have it, Tim Tams can be used for the purpose at hand!

Banty

Banty
July 20th 03, 06:08 PM
In article <ekzSa.106959$N7.13914@sccrnsc03>, "Dizzysmamma" says...
>
>{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Duncan}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} }}}}}}}}}}}}}
>
>
>

I think Duncan just got smushed to a little grease spot...