Re: teaching good sleep habits (xpost)

[KimandJuan]

PEOPLE, she is a new Mom to TWINS!! Give her a break. She is simply asking
for any tips it teaching good sleeping habits from the beginning. It is so
nice to hear that so many of you had all the answers from the beginning!!!
Maybe you have forgotten that when the babies are small and they are both
wanting to be rocked and there was only one of you there at the time. I think
that in posts like this rather than being judgmental of the post and condemning
her for "considering" Ferber or what ever else you want to call it, you should
sympathize with her and give her some tips that may have worked for you. She
didn't ask to be judged she asked for advice. Now she probably feels guilty
for considering a perfectly understandable thing for twins A SCHEDULE!!!!
Read her post again!!! She said that she KNOWS they are too young for Ferber
she asking for tips in getting them on a schedule other than FERBER.
Here are the questions she asked.

When/how can I start teaching them to relax themselves to sleep on their
own?

When/how do I start trying to introduce a "scheduled" nap-time into their
lives?

Try answering the post instead of being judgmental of a new Mom to and being
appalled that she would want advice on getting them to sleep a little quicker.




~Kimberly
Mommy to Alexis Iliana 07/17/99 and
Emma Elidia & Aislyn Gabriela 10/01/02
come see us...
http://www.babiesonline.com/babies/a/aislynemma/

[Shirley M...have a goodaa \\;-\)]

Sorry Kim, but I am appalled. I too was a new mom, and never had kids until
42, didn't have any siblings so I had no clue, but I'd never let a baby cry.
We all told her that and to lighten up and just go with the flow and forget
"getting them to sleep in their beds." We went after parents here that let
their kids cry and they were 6 months or more...sorry for being so hard BUT,
of course she is the mom of twins, so are most of us and more. I remember
sitting on the floor crying because the babies wouldn't go to sleep but I
would not have thought to let them "cry it out." They just got here, how
could I. Judgmental, yes, but there was also a attitude about starting out
right as opposed to "help" I'm in need of your suggestions, she wanted to
know how to get them to sleep in their beds - NOW! And we all gave her our
suggestions - it doesn't happen in the beginning - it happens later. We are
supportive but we are also on the side of the babies too.

Shirley

"KimandJuan" > wrote in message
...
> PEOPLE, she is a new Mom to TWINS!! Give her a break. She is simply
asking
> for any tips it teaching good sleeping habits from the beginning. It is
so
> nice to hear that so many of you had all the answers from the beginning!!!
> Maybe you have forgotten that when the babies are small and they are both
> wanting to be rocked and there was only one of you there at the time. I
think
> that in posts like this rather than being judgmental of the post and
condemning
> her for "considering" Ferber or what ever else you want to call it, you
should
> sympathize with her and give her some tips that may have worked for you.
She
> didn't ask to be judged she asked for advice. Now she probably feels
guilty
> for considering a perfectly understandable thing for twins A SCHEDULE!!!!
> Read her post again!!! She said that she KNOWS they are too young for
Ferber
> she asking for tips in getting them on a schedule other than FERBER.
> Here are the questions she asked.
>
> When/how can I start teaching them to relax themselves to sleep on their
> own?
>
> When/how do I start trying to introduce a "scheduled" nap-time into their
> lives?
>
> Try answering the post instead of being judgmental of a new Mom to and
being
> appalled that she would want advice on getting them to sleep a little
quicker.
>
>
>
>
> ~Kimberly
> Mommy to Alexis Iliana 07/17/99 and
> Emma Elidia & Aislyn Gabriela 10/01/02
> come see us...
> http://www.babiesonline.com/babies/a/aislynemma/

[The Huwe Family]

I don't necessarily think they were being hard on Marie (ok, they weren't
answering her questions) , just attacking Marty.

Honestly, I haven't had my triplets yet, and so I haven't formed any
opinions upon how to get children to sleep. I just remember my mother who
did not run over and pick us up every time we cried. There were times at
night she would let us just cry ourselves to sleep. I know that my mother
is not the only one. It was the train of thought back in the late 60's
early 70's that this was ok. I don't have problems with ABANDONMENT or
SEPARATION. So I honestly don't think that letting the babies cry leaves an
emotionally damaged child. I have friends who were raised the same way, and
THEY are not emotionally damaged either.

I agree that 1 hour of crying seems a bit excessive to me, but if it is
working for her than more power to her. I have learned as a teacher that
each child is different and react differently to the same events. I'm sure
she would change her method if it wasn't working.

Gayle



"KimandJuan" > wrote in message
...
> PEOPLE, she is a new Mom to TWINS!! Give her a break. She is simply
asking
> for any tips it teaching good sleeping habits from the beginning. It is
so
> nice to hear that so many of you had all the answers from the beginning!!!
> Maybe you have forgotten that when the babies are small and they are both
> wanting to be rocked and there was only one of you there at the time. I
think
> that in posts like this rather than being judgmental of the post and
condemning
> her for "considering" Ferber or what ever else you want to call it, you
should
> sympathize with her and give her some tips that may have worked for you.
She
> didn't ask to be judged she asked for advice. Now she probably feels
guilty
> for considering a perfectly understandable thing for twins A SCHEDULE!!!!
> Read her post again!!! She said that she KNOWS they are too young for
Ferber
> she asking for tips in getting them on a schedule other than FERBER.
> Here are the questions she asked.
>
> When/how can I start teaching them to relax themselves to sleep on their
> own?
>
> When/how do I start trying to introduce a "scheduled" nap-time into their
> lives?
>
> Try answering the post instead of being judgmental of a new Mom to and
being
> appalled that she would want advice on getting them to sleep a little
quicker.
>
>
>
>
> ~Kimberly
> Mommy to Alexis Iliana 07/17/99 and
> Emma Elidia & Aislyn Gabriela 10/01/02
> come see us...
> http://www.babiesonline.com/babies/a/aislynemma/

[Missy in Indiana]

Kim

Very well put...thanks!
Missy in Indiana http://hometown.aol.com/mhrust/overviewforng.html
Morgan Olivia & Julia Lucille 4/28/01 (YAY!)

[Truffles]

Shirley M...have a goodaa \;-) wrote:
> Sorry Kim, but I am appalled. I too was a new mom, and never had kids until
> 42, didn't have any siblings so I had no clue, but I'd never let a baby cry.
> We all told her that and to lighten up and just go with the flow and forget
> "getting them to sleep in their beds." We went after parents here that let
> their kids cry and they were 6 months or more...sorry for being so hard BUT,
> of course she is the mom of twins, so are most of us and more. I remember
> sitting on the floor crying because the babies wouldn't go to sleep but I
> would not have thought to let them "cry it out." They just got here, how
> could I. Judgmental, yes, but there was also a attitude about starting out
> right as opposed to "help" I'm in need of your suggestions, she wanted to
> know how to get them to sleep in their beds - NOW! And we all gave her our
> suggestions - it doesn't happen in the beginning - it happens later. We are
> supportive but we are also on the side of the babies too.

I have to agree with you, Shirley.

In fact, I was up until 2 am last night with Katerina. Did I let her
CIO? No. It's my JOB as a parent to comfort my child. It's definitely
not easy but who said parenting is supposed to be.

Am I tired today? You bet! But so what. It comes with the territory.

To the OP, try reading, "The No-Cry Sleep Solution" by Elizabeth
Pantley. I refer to it every few months. Wonderful book.

WRT schedules, we started a very loose, extremely adaptable one around 4
months. It was more of watching their natural patterns and adapting a
schedule to fit those patterns. You might want to establish a bedtime
routine. That way they have an idea of what's coming next.

Ultimately, they will figure out how to sleep on their own. But if you
don't want to force them it might take awhile. I still comfort my
children when I put them to bed but the type of comfort and the length
of time it takes has changed many times.

As to "teaching" them "how" to fall asleep, I don't think you really
need to worry about that. It will come in time.

I also strongly suggest getting a couple of Maya wraps so you can wear
them. They'll save your arms and your back.

--
Brigitte aa #2145
edd #3 February 15, 2004
http://www.babiesonline.com/babies/j/joshuaandkaterina/

"Readers are plentiful; thinkers are rare."
~ Harriet Martineau