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just me
February 28th 04, 12:37 AM
Sigh.

it was bound to happen. I knew it would.

Now it is.

Our wonderful next door neighbors are in their early 80's. He is starting
to get a bit forgetful and is very hard of hearing. She has had a few odd
spells and been hospitalized with them twice in a year.

They have been wonderful surrogate grandparents for DS. They have invited
us to use their inground swimming pool any time. And we have. DS learned
to swim there. They've just been very good neighbors, in the best sense of
the words.

But, they are feeling that they should recognize their current and growing
limitations. They are moving into a second house that is on their DD's
property in W. Palm. That is a long hike from here. The house isn't up for
sale yet, but it will be soon, they are getting it ready. It will probably
sell quickly.

We haven't told DS yet. He takes these types of things very hard and this
is probably not going to be easy. He went into a real funk when his best
friend moved from the next street over to a home two developments away
[three miles]. So, we have to do this before the for sale sign goes up, but
not today.

So, if you could think good thoughts, pray for good neighbors, preferably
with lovely boys DS' age whom we have no concerns about him socializing
with, I'd appreciate it. And, add a bit of a touch of wisdom for how and
when we tell DS.

Oh, and one other thing. I'd like to give them a gift of some sort to
express our appreciation for them and all they've done for us in these nine
years. I also don't want to burden them with more gee-gaws to move around
and dust. Any suggestions on what to give a wonderful old couple?


-Aula

Rosalie B.
February 28th 04, 01:48 AM
x-no-archive:yes


"just me" > wrote:
<snip>
>They have been wonderful surrogate grandparents for DS. They have invited
>us to use their inground swimming pool any time. And we have. DS learned
>to swim there. They've just been very good neighbors, in the best sense of
>the words.
<snip>
>So, if you could think good thoughts, pray for good neighbors, preferably
>with lovely boys DS' age whom we have no concerns about him socializing
>with, I'd appreciate it. And, add a bit of a touch of wisdom for how and
>when we tell DS.
>
Thinking good thoughts about neighbors.

>Oh, and one other thing. I'd like to give them a gift of some sort to
>express our appreciation for them and all they've done for us in these nine
>years. I also don't want to burden them with more gee-gaws to move around
>and dust. Any suggestions on what to give a wonderful old couple?

Some ideas right off the top of my head:

If you know that they like to eat out - a gift certificate to eat at
some nice restaurant. Or a gift certificate for a shopping service or
something that delivers prepared meals.

A Golden Age certificate for the national parks

Depending on their son's property - plants for the yard (preferably
planted so they don't have to do it)

Gift certificate for limo service or taxi service - if your DH drives,
he could even do this himself.

Help with sorting stuff to move.



grandma Rosalie

Cathy Kearns
February 28th 04, 03:34 AM
"just me" > wrote in message
om...
> Sigh.
>
> it was bound to happen. I knew it would.
>
> Now it is.
>
> Our wonderful next door neighbors are in their early 80's. He is starting
> to get a bit forgetful and is very hard of hearing. She has had a few odd
> spells and been hospitalized with them twice in a year.
>
> They have been wonderful surrogate grandparents for DS. They have invited
> us to use their inground swimming pool any time. And we have. DS learned
> to swim there. They've just been very good neighbors, in the best sense
of
> the words.
>
> But, they are feeling that they should recognize their current and growing
> limitations. They are moving into a second house that is on their DD's
> property in W. Palm. That is a long hike from here. The house isn't up
for
> sale yet, but it will be soon, they are getting it ready. It will
probably
> sell quickly.
>
> We haven't told DS yet. He takes these types of things very hard and this
> is probably not going to be easy. He went into a real funk when his best
> friend moved from the next street over to a home two developments away
> [three miles]. So, we have to do this before the for sale sign goes up,
but
> not today.
>
> So, if you could think good thoughts, pray for good neighbors, preferably
> with lovely boys DS' age whom we have no concerns about him socializing
> with, I'd appreciate it. And, add a bit of a touch of wisdom for how and
> when we tell DS.
>
All I can say is, I know how you feel. My youngest
daughter has fallen in love with a family that moved here
just two years ago. Their oldest is a boy, now 6, three
years younger than my daughter. Their daughter came as a
baby, but is now a walking, talking toddler. My daughter
goes and plays with this family every chance she gets.
The parents think of her as a great oldest sister, yet in our
family she only gets to be the baby. She just came home
with fresh baked bread they all made together. They are
moving 400 miles away in a month. I already promised
she spend a week with them this summer. (They invited
her.) But she's already heartbroken. And so are we.

Emily
February 28th 04, 03:34 AM
just me wrote:

> Oh, and one other thing. I'd like to give them a gift of some sort to
> express our appreciation for them and all they've done for us in these nine
> years. I also don't want to burden them with more gee-gaws to move around
> and dust. Any suggestions on what to give a wonderful old couple?

How about helping them move, both on this side and the other?
It might be good for DS too (how old is he?) to see that they are
not disappearing, but are going somewhere where he can imagine
them, if not visit them that often. I think they might also want
something tangible to remind them of you on a daily basis. Do
you have any photographs of DS happily playing in their pool?
They might like a framed one...

--
Emily
mom to Toby 5/1/02

Louise
February 28th 04, 03:34 AM
On Fri, 27 Feb 2004 18:37:36 EST, "just me"
> wrote:
>Oh, and one other thing. I'd like to give them a gift of some sort to
>express our appreciation for them and all they've done for us in these nine
>years. I also don't want to burden them with more gee-gaws to move around
>and dust. Any suggestions on what to give a wonderful old couple?

Letters from you and your son after they move. Snapshots of them with
your son (he might like this too.)

Gift certificates to restaurants in their new community, or something
else they can share with their son so they can feel like hosts.

Louise

just me
February 28th 04, 03:35 AM
x-no-archive:yes

"Rosalie B." > wrote in message
...
> Some ideas right off the top of my head:
>
> If you know that they like to eat out - a gift certificate to eat at
> some nice restaurant. Or a gift certificate for a shopping service or
> something that delivers prepared meals.
>
> A Golden Age certificate for the national parks
>
> Depending on their son's property - plants for the yard (preferably
> planted so they don't have to do it)
>
> Gift certificate for limo service or taxi service - if your DH drives,
> he could even do this himself.
>
> Help with sorting stuff to move.
>


Those are all wonderful suggestions and gives me a great deal to ponder. I
appreciate the help, Rosalie. I suspect the gift certificate to eat out
might be very well received, as well as the plants. They have tended their
yard and plants very carefully for many years and have some beautiful plants
that show the wonderful care.

-Aula

just me
February 28th 04, 04:43 AM
"Cathy Kearns" > wrote in message
. com...
> All I can say is, I know how you feel. My youngest
> daughter has fallen in love with a family that moved here
> just two years ago. Their oldest is a boy, now 6, three
> years younger than my daughter. Their daughter came as a
> baby, but is now a walking, talking toddler. My daughter
> goes and plays with this family every chance she gets.
> The parents think of her as a great oldest sister, yet in our
> family she only gets to be the baby. She just came home
> with fresh baked bread they all made together. They are
> moving 400 miles away in a month. I already promised
> she spend a week with them this summer. (They invited
> her.) But she's already heartbroken. And so are we.
>

<<<<<<<<<<Cathy's DD & Cathy>>>>>>>>>

No, it is not easy. It is hard to say goodbye, and we all know that when
people move away relationships change. I hope your DD enjoys her summer
trip a great deal! That bread sounds awfully good, too!

-Aula

just me
February 28th 04, 04:44 AM
"Emily" > wrote in message
news:TBS%b.135098$jk2.552341@attbi_s53...
> How about helping them move, both on this side and the other?
> It might be good for DS too (how old is he?) to see that they are
> not disappearing, but are going somewhere where he can imagine
> them, if not visit them that often. I think they might also want
> something tangible to remind them of you on a daily basis. Do
> you have any photographs of DS happily playing in their pool?
> They might like a framed one...
>


Oh, wow! You may really be onto something with that idea of a pic of DS in
their pool! I don't know if we have one, but I will start going through the
computer to find out. [Maybe I could throw DS in their pool for five
minutes in March Florida weather and get him to look happy if I can't......]
BTW, DS is 8.5 now. Very grown up and quite not, iykwim.

-Aula

just me
February 28th 04, 04:44 AM
"Louise" > wrote in message
...
> Letters from you and your son after they move. Snapshots of them with
> your son (he might like this too.)
>
> Gift certificates to restaurants in their new community, or something
> else they can share with their son so they can feel like hosts.
>

The suggestions of pics seem to be the most popular suggestion, although the
gift certificate to eat out is high up there as well. I suspect that, due
to everyone's kind helpful suggestions, I will have a hard time selecting a
choice rather than a hard time wracking my brain. I appreciate your
suggestions!

-Aula

dragonlady
February 28th 04, 03:11 PM
In article >,
"just me" > wrote:

> x-no-archive:yes
>
> "Rosalie B." > wrote in message
> ...
> > Some ideas right off the top of my head:
> >
> > If you know that they like to eat out - a gift certificate to eat at
> > some nice restaurant. Or a gift certificate for a shopping service or
> > something that delivers prepared meals.
> >
> > A Golden Age certificate for the national parks
> >
> > Depending on their son's property - plants for the yard (preferably
> > planted so they don't have to do it)
> >
> > Gift certificate for limo service or taxi service - if your DH drives,
> > he could even do this himself.
> >
> > Help with sorting stuff to move.
> >
>
>
> Those are all wonderful suggestions and gives me a great deal to ponder. I
> appreciate the help, Rosalie. I suspect the gift certificate to eat out
> might be very well received, as well as the plants. They have tended their
> yard and plants very carefully for many years and have some beautiful plants
> that show the wonderful care.
>
> -Aula
>

Check to make sure that they will have space for a garden, and to do
some of their own landscaping. If they have plants they've had for
years, you might see if you could hire a landscaper to transplant some
of them -- I know leaving behind plants you've tended can be hard.
Alternatively, several hours of gardening labor (you, DH and DS could
help) or a gift certificate at a local nursery.


But first -- you should probably also check to make sure they WANT to
continue outdoor gardening!

meh
--
Children won't care how much you know until they know how much you care

just me
February 28th 04, 06:21 PM
"dragonlady" > wrote in message
...
> But first -- you should probably also check to make sure they WANT to
> continue outdoor gardening!
>

I've been pondering that question, myself. They will have a yard, and it is
shared with their DD and her rapidly diminishing family [as the grandkids
leave home], so the major work will be done by DD and her hubby. I know the
neighbor lady really enjoys her plants and is up to tending them now, but he
otoh, is not able to keep up with much physical activity beyond the daily
dog walk he goes on now. If I go into the plan route maybe I should
consider an indoor or porch plant like an orchid, which she particularly
enjoys. That might be a good compromise, but I'm still listening to
suggestions. There have been several really good ones, both here and on
alt.moms and mkfl.

-Aula

Jan
March 1st 04, 11:48 PM
"just me" > wrote in message >...

> I've been pondering that question, myself. They will have a yard, and it is
> shared with their DD and her rapidly diminishing family [as the grandkids
> leave home], so the major work will be done by DD and her hubby. I know the
> neighbor lady really enjoys her plants and is up to tending them now, but he
> otoh, is not able to keep up with much physical activity beyond the daily
> dog walk he goes on now. If I go into the plan route maybe I should
> consider an indoor or porch plant like an orchid, which she particularly
> enjoys. That might be a good compromise, but I'm still listening to
> suggestions. There have been several really good ones, both here and on
> alt.moms and mkfl.
>
> -Aula

In the plant theme, instead of buying them a new plant, it can also be
nice to take cuttings and start a new plant from a favorite they have
now. Not sure if you have time for that, but could also be a wonderful
gift for next xmas or something.

-Jan