4.5 hour bus trip at 34 weeks?

[zeldabee]

I'm actually not that enthusiastic about it, but my mother really has her
heart set on my coming down for a visit next weekend. I'm inclined on the
one hand to indulge her--she has cancer, and her prognosis isn't good. My
sister has been with her on an extended visit (she's a school teacher on
vacation) and it'll be her last weekend there. My mother wants the three of
us to spend some time together, I think maybe because she's not sure how
well she'll be--or even if she'll be around--by Christmas, which is when
we've both got tentative plans to be there. And I feel really badly that
it's been so hard for me to truely show up for my mother

On the other hand, I'm 33 weeks today, and I'm moving this weekend. I've
not had a day to do nothing but rest for a couple of months, between the
apartment search and lately packing...and I'm still working full-time.
(Last night I really overdid it packing, and I was in pain for a couple of
hours--lots of BH, pain in my abdomen and lower back--actually scared
myself.) I'd forgotten that I'd halfway promised to go down there that
weekend, and I was so looking forward to finally having a weekend to just
putter around and visit friends.

So, those are my feelings around going on the visit--apart from my
ambivalence, how about the straight, travelling-while-pregnant aspect? The
last bus trip I took was about the same duration, at 26 weeks. I was a bit
uncomfortable, but it wasn't too bad. I made sure to have an aisle seat,
and used the restroom (yuck) about every 45 minutes. I'm much more
uncomfortable in general now--I'm *really* big, I'm carrying straight out
forward, and am having a lot of ligament pain.

Is it necessary to ask my doc or midwife about such a trip at 34 weeks? I'd
be going down on a Friday and returning on Sunday. Has anyone had any
similar experience?

--
z e l d a b e e @ p a n i x . c o m http://NewsReader.Com/

[Sue]

Well having lost my mom to cancer four years ago and who terribly misses her
very much, I would go. I traveled when I was pregnant and besides taking
breaks to stretch my legs and go to the bathroom, the trip was fine. I
understand that your tired, but since you will be visiting at home, won't
that be pretty relaxing? I would think more so than unpacking and moving.
That's what I would do. Good luck in your decision. :o)
--
Sue
mom to three girls

zeldabee > wrote in message
...
> I'm actually not that enthusiastic about it, but my mother really has her
> heart set on my coming down for a visit next weekend. I'm inclined on the
> one hand to indulge her--she has cancer, and her prognosis isn't good. My
> sister has been with her on an extended visit (she's a school teacher on
> vacation) and it'll be her last weekend there. My mother wants the three
of
> us to spend some time together, I think maybe because she's not sure how
> well she'll be--or even if she'll be around--by Christmas, which is when
> we've both got tentative plans to be there. And I feel really badly that
> it's been so hard for me to truely show up for my mother
>
> On the other hand, I'm 33 weeks today, and I'm moving this weekend. I've
> not had a day to do nothing but rest for a couple of months, between the
> apartment search and lately packing...and I'm still working full-time.
> (Last night I really overdid it packing, and I was in pain for a couple of
> hours--lots of BH, pain in my abdomen and lower back--actually scared
> myself.) I'd forgotten that I'd halfway promised to go down there that
> weekend, and I was so looking forward to finally having a weekend to just
> putter around and visit friends.
>
> So, those are my feelings around going on the visit--apart from my
> ambivalence, how about the straight, travelling-while-pregnant aspect? The
> last bus trip I took was about the same duration, at 26 weeks. I was a bit
> uncomfortable, but it wasn't too bad. I made sure to have an aisle seat,
> and used the restroom (yuck) about every 45 minutes. I'm much more
> uncomfortable in general now--I'm *really* big, I'm carrying straight out
> forward, and am having a lot of ligament pain.
>
> Is it necessary to ask my doc or midwife about such a trip at 34 weeks?
I'd
> be going down on a Friday and returning on Sunday. Has anyone had any
> similar experience?
>
> --
> z e l d a b e e @ p a n i x . c o m http://NewsReader.Com/

[Alicia Elliott]

Hi Zeldabee, I can sympathize with you about not wanting to go, even though
you feel you should. My experience with travelling has been that as long as
you can have access to a loo, and if you take a cushion or something to make
the seat more comfy, you should be fine. It's not a risk at that stage
unless you have been told directly not to, or you are on bedrest or
something. It sounds to me like you are stressing, and finding it hard to
rest when you need to anyway. Is there someone else you can stay with while
visiting the town where your mum lives? Or maybe you can swing a hotel
room? That way you can have somewhere to retreat to and nap, or just watch
TV if things get too much. If not, I suggest that you are really careful
with not burning yourself out. Make sure that you retreat to the room
you're staying in if you need to, and be really kind to yourself. It won't
benefit you, your mum or your baby if you are fried. Take good care,
-Alicia

[Elizabeth Reid]

zeldabee > wrote in message >...

> Is it necessary to ask my doc or midwife about such a trip at 34 weeks? I'd
> be going down on a Friday and returning on Sunday. Has anyone had any
> similar experience?

I took an airplane trip at about the same point in pregnancy,
and my doctor said the biggest 'danger' was that if I went into
labor prematurely while away, the baby and I would wind up having
to spend time in a hospital farther away from home than would
be ideal. He took pains to emphasize that nothing about the trip
would make it more likely that I *would* go into labor prematurely,
but that if I did, it might be quite inconvenient for me not
to be near home after the baby was born. However, he OK'd
the trip, I went and everything was fine.

Beth

[zeldabee]

"Alicia Elliott" > wrote:
> Hi Zeldabee, I can sympathize with you about not wanting to go, even
> though you feel you should. My experience with travelling has been that
> as long as you can have access to a loo, and if you take a cushion or
> something to make the seat more comfy, you should be fine.

I don't know if there's enough room on those seats for both me *and* a
cushion. :o) And yes, there is a loo, though one bus I was on recently had
a door that had a strange design, and I could barely get through at 26
weeks.

> It's not a
> risk at that stage unless you have been told directly not to, or you are
> on bedrest or something. It sounds to me like you are stressing, and
> finding it hard to rest when you need to anyway. Is there someone else
> you can stay with while visiting the town where your mum lives? Or maybe
> you can swing a hotel room? That way you can have somewhere to retreat
> to and nap, or just watch TV if things get too much.

No, this wouldn't work, Mum wouldn't understand at all...she really wants
us to have our Togetherness, and she's *very* touchy and prone to anger at
(often imagined) slights. This is what makes it really tough--that she's
been so "difficult" lately--she's lost just enough of her mental capacity
to make things difficult for her, but not so much that she's not acutely
aware of it. I think she's also angry at the unfairness of the disease in
the first place.

Dealing with her requires a certain amount of patience, which is hard while
I'm basically ruled by my raging hormones, and so prone to tears and
irritability myself. It's also just hard to witness, as it's been for
others I've known who've gone through similar illnesses, or even
Alzheimer's, with their parents.

> If not, I suggest
> that you are really careful with not burning yourself out. Make sure
> that you retreat to the room you're staying in if you need to, and be
> really kind to yourself. It won't benefit you, your mum or your baby if
> you are fried.

I'm actually feeling less stressed in general now that I've moved. I'm so
relieved to have a secure place to live, that a lot of the pressure has
been removed. I have yet to unpack, of course...but I'm already more
comfortable in the new place, with my new air conditioner. :o) I feel more
ready to deal with the upcoming trip.

> Take good care, -Alicia

Thanks...

--
z e l d a b e e @ p a n i x . c o m http://NewsReader.Com/

[zeldabee]

(Elizabeth Reid) wrote:
> zeldabee > wrote...
>
> > Is it necessary to ask my doc or midwife about such a trip at 34 weeks?
> > I'd be going down on a Friday and returning on Sunday. Has anyone had
> > any similar experience?
>
> I took an airplane trip at about the same point in pregnancy,
> and my doctor said the biggest 'danger' was that if I went into
> labor prematurely while away, the baby and I would wind up having
> to spend time in a hospital farther away from home than would
> be ideal. He took pains to emphasize that nothing about the trip
> would make it more likely that I *would* go into labor prematurely,
> but that if I did, it might be quite inconvenient for me not
> to be near home after the baby was born. However, he OK'd
> the trip, I went and everything was fine.

That's pretty much what I thought, but it's nice to have it confirmed.

--
z e l d a b e e @ p a n i x . c o m http://NewsReader.Com/