Re: travel w/toddler and not dad?

[Mr. X]

> wrote in message
...
> Has anyone ever tried to make an extended trip with a toddler, leaving
> behind a very bonded other parent? My daughter is 18 months old. In
> the next couple of months we would really like to take her to see my
> very old grandma, who lives a long and expensive plane flight away.
> I can't imagine going for less than a week and usually plan about a 10
> day trip. Finances and other considerations will probably prevent my
> husband from traveling with us, much as he would like to, and my
> grandma's age makes waiting much longer risky. I'm just worried how
> my daughter will react to leaving her Daddy behind--not to mention the
> other family and friends she sees regularly. She and he are very
> close: we share childcare duties and he sees more of her during the
> work week days than I do. She won't know anyone but me where we're
> going. What do you think my chances are?


Depends on what you are trying to accomplish?
In and out? Minimize frustration? Ease of traveling? Should be fine.

My wife and I do this between Europe and California.

But the above should not be the goal.
My wife wants to watch grandma see the little girl.
And she wants to watch the girl watch grandma.
And she wants to watch me watch the girl watch grandma watching the girl
watching mom watching me watching the girl....

This is not a tongue twister and I think you get the idea.

The memories of the family bond might one day be lost upon the girl.
But it will not be lost upon you as you reflect on your daughter as she
grows older.

So, we find a way to get the money for all of us to go.
We just find a way.

> Thanks,
>
> Beth, mother of Margaret, 18 months

[Nina]

She will be ok. Its good for kids to meet new people, to learn a little
independence. I'm military and have much experience with traveling solo, the
kids adjust very well.
Go for it!


> wrote in message
...
> Has anyone ever tried to make an extended trip with a toddler, leaving
> behind a very bonded other parent? My daughter is 18 months old. In
> the next couple of months we would really like to take her to see my
> very old grandma, who lives a long and expensive plane flight away.
> I can't imagine going for less than a week and usually plan about a 10
> day trip. Finances and other considerations will probably prevent my
> husband from traveling with us, much as he would like to, and my
> grandma's age makes waiting much longer risky. I'm just worried how
> my daughter will react to leaving her Daddy behind--not to mention the
> other family and friends she sees regularly. She and he are very
> close: we share childcare duties and he sees more of her during the
> work week days than I do. She won't know anyone but me where we're
> going. What do you think my chances are?
>
> Thanks,
>
> Beth, mother of Margaret, 18 months

[Sue]

I think your daughter will be just fine. My husband travels and has since
the girls were babies. Bring fun and new things to play with to keep her
occupied and I am sure as long as you are there, she will be fine.
--
Sue
mom to three girls

> wrote in message
...
> Has anyone ever tried to make an extended trip with a toddler, leaving
> behind a very bonded other parent? My daughter is 18 months old. In
> the next couple of months we would really like to take her to see my
> very old grandma, who lives a long and expensive plane flight away.
> I can't imagine going for less than a week and usually plan about a 10
> day trip. Finances and other considerations will probably prevent my
> husband from traveling with us, much as he would like to, and my
> grandma's age makes waiting much longer risky. I'm just worried how
> my daughter will react to leaving her Daddy behind--not to mention the
> other family and friends she sees regularly. She and he are very
> close: we share childcare duties and he sees more of her during the
> work week days than I do. She won't know anyone but me where we're
> going. What do you think my chances are?
>
> Thanks,
>
> Beth, mother of Margaret, 18 months

[HollyLewis]

>Has anyone ever tried to make an extended trip with a toddler, leaving
>behind a very bonded other parent?

Well, no, but my husband took a week-long trip away from us when our son was 12
months old.

Honestly, I wouldn't recommend it. My sister came out to visit and help me,
which was great, but DS definitely missed his Daddy, and he was not yet old
enough to understand when Daddy was coming home or to express his feelings very
fluently, so we had some very rough evenings. Now, it obviously didn't do any
real harm, but I still would have preferred that he hadn't gone.

Your daughter is a little older, though, so it probably wouldn't be as hard on
her. Plus, I suspect that for the child, being out of her usual place without
Daddy would be easier than Daddy not being in his usual place, if you see what
I mean. And visiting your elderly and perhaps failing grandma *is* a pretty
compelling reason to make the trip as soon as you can. How adaptable is she in
general? Does she like meeting new people? Have you traveled with her before
as a family, and how did she do? Does she talk on the phone yet? And,
critically, how well do you think *you* will cope with traveling with her with
no other adult help, especially given that she's likely to be a bit out of
sorts at least some of the time?

Only you can really decide how she's likely to react and whether the trip will
be worth the effort. It probably is; remember that at the very worst, the two
of you will only be miserable for about a week. ;-) At best, she'll be fine,
and she'll learn a lot by being exposed to so many things outside her ordinary
life, in addition to having fun with her great grandma.

Holly
Mom to Camden, 2.5 yrs