more on dummy/pacifier usage (x-posted)

[Leanne]

some stuff I read out of another article today, which I thought was pretty
interesting -

Dummy Myths and Facts.


FACT 1:
Studies of newborns have shown no evidence of so-called nipple confusion.
Babies do seem to be able to suck for comfort on a dummy yet know how to
feed from the breast without mixing the two. Studies have actually show a
very different action is required to hold the dummy in the mouth for comfort
to that required to latch onto the breast too feed.

FACT 2:
Babies who are given dummies tend to wean earlier on average than babies who
are not given dummies. (myth)
We know that babies are not refusing the breast because they want a dummy
but as yet we do not know the cause or causes of earlier weaning. We do,
however, know that anxious mums who feel they do not have enough milk to
satisfy their babies often add extra bottlefeeds to supplement
breastfeeding. These same mums often also use a dummy because they are more
anxious if their babies cry, The extra feeds and dummies in between may well
lead to less breast stimulation, less milk and an earlier cessation of
breastfeeding.

FACT 3:
Four studies have shown that babies who use dummies halve their risk of
SIDS.
Although more research is needed before we all rush out and make all babies
use dummies, these studies have been scrupulously conducted and the findings
cannot be ignored. We don't know why dummies help prevent SIDS but we think
it may be due to the fact that sucking a dummy keeps a baby in a lighter
sleep phase than the deep sleep non-sucking babies can lapse into.

FACT 4:
Adults who used dummies as babies are less likely to smoke.
Human babies have a very real need to suck for comfort and we are beginning
to realise that a lack of comfort in infancy can cause addictive behaviours
in later life.

it also goes onto say that a dummy should not be used to always comfort your
baby and gives examples on when it should and shouldn't be used, ie; don't
give your baby their dummy for long periods of time when they are awake, etc
etc.

[Jake Mysterio]

> Human babies have a very real need to suck for comfort and we are
> beginning to realise that a lack of comfort in infancy can cause addictive
> behaviours in later life.

Just because my baby doesnt have a dummy doesnt mean she is not comforted
infact she is probably more comforted because I need to spend more one on
one time to settle her when she is distressed rather than just shoving a
dummy in her mouth. And she is a much better sleeper than my older child who
had a dummy. Dummies are great things to throw out of cots. I used to spend
half the night searching for the bloody things and I vowed this child would
not have one. The only time she has had one is when she was in hospital at
6-8 weeks old and we were pressured into giving her one. She never had it
again when she came home.

Cheri

[toypup]

"Jake Mysterio" > wrote in message
...
> Just because my baby doesnt have a dummy doesnt mean she is not comforted
> infact she is probably more comforted because I need to spend more one on
> one time to settle her when she is distressed rather than just shoving a
> dummy in her mouth.

DS had a dummy, DD did not. DS wanted a dummy, DD did not. I did not
"shove" it in his mouth. He wanted it. I could see his whole body relax
when he got it.

And she is a much better sleeper than my older child who
> had a dummy.

Both my kids are very good sleepers, but DS was a marathon sleeper. He
would sleep 11 hours straight through the night and then 4 hours straight in
the day.

Dummies are great things to throw out of cots. I used to spend
> half the night searching for the bloody things and I vowed this child
> would not have one.

Then you should have done as I did and bought multiple sets of dummies and
laid them around the cot.

I am not pro-dummy nor anti-dummy. I believe we should raise our kids
according to their individual needs, hence DS got one and DD did not. I
would like to point out that my experience directly contradicts yours.

[Kelly]

"toypup" > wrote in message
.. .
>
> DS had a dummy, DD did not. DS wanted a dummy, DD did not. I did not
> "shove" it in his mouth. He wanted it. I could see his whole body relax
> when he got it.

My girls were the same, the eldest had a dummy and the younger one didn't.
It was there choice that one preferred it and one didn't...

>
> Both my kids are very good sleepers, but DS was a marathon sleeper. He
> would sleep 11 hours straight through the night and then 4 hours straight
> in the day.

Both mine were bad sleepers up until about age 2.5...

>
> Then you should have done as I did and bought multiple sets of dummies and
> laid them around the cot.

That's what I did as well..

>
> I am not pro-dummy nor anti-dummy.

Same here.. My younger one had a bottle of milk as her comfort thing.. They
were both just as hard to wean off..

[A&G&K&H]

"toypup" > wrote in message
.. .
>
> "Jake Mysterio" > wrote in message
> ...
> > Just because my baby doesnt have a dummy doesnt mean she is not
comforted
> > infact she is probably more comforted because I need to spend more one
on
> > one time to settle her when she is distressed rather than just shoving a
> > dummy in her mouth.
>
> DS had a dummy, DD did not. DS wanted a dummy, DD did not. I did not
> "shove" it in his mouth. He wanted it. I could see his whole body relax
> when he got it.
>
> And she is a much better sleeper than my older child who
> > had a dummy.
>
> Both my kids are very good sleepers, but DS was a marathon sleeper. He
> would sleep 11 hours straight through the night and then 4 hours straight
in
> the day.
>
> Dummies are great things to throw out of cots. I used to spend
> > half the night searching for the bloody things and I vowed this child
> > would not have one.
>
> Then you should have done as I did and bought multiple sets of dummies and
> laid them around the cot.
>
> I am not pro-dummy nor anti-dummy. I believe we should raise our kids
> according to their individual needs, hence DS got one and DD did not. I
> would like to point out that my experience directly contradicts yours.
>

I have had the same experience here .. DD *needed* a dummy, DS did not.
Both are good sleepers and finding a dummy was never really an issue for us
either.
Amanda

--
DD 15th August 2002
1 tiny angel Nov 2003
DS 20th August 2004

[Leanne]

> Just because my baby doesnt have a dummy doesnt mean she is not comforted
> infact she is probably more comforted because I need to spend more one on
> one time to settle her when she is distressed rather than just shoving a
> dummy in her mouth. And she is a much better sleeper than my older child
> who had a dummy. Dummies are great things to throw out of cots. I used to
> spend half the night searching for the bloody things and I vowed this
> child would not have one. The only time she has had one is when she was in
> hospital at 6-8 weeks old and we were pressured into giving her one. She
> never had it again when she came home.

I wish people wouldn't take these as personal attacks... its not like one of
us wrote it and said 'this is how it HAS to be'. It is simply an article
pointing out things that are starting to come out more and more in research.

as someone else said, I'm not pro-dummy or anti-dummy, I realise that some
kids like them and others don't.

My son had a dummy, he found it very comforting and just because he had a
dummy doesn't mean I just dumped him on the floor with the TV and that was
it, in fact most of the time I had to hold him, because that's what he
liked. Then you will get someone like my sisters who's son prefers to lay
around by himself and not have too many people poking and prodding him.

I also wouldn't say your DD is 'more comforted' just because you think you
may have to spend more one on one time with her, if the baby is distressed
they are distressed whether you are holding them or not.

I also never had to spend time searching for a dummy, but I do realise
peoples experiences are different. Caden has also given up the dummy, he was
17 months at this time, and I can honestly say he is a worse sleeper now
than he was when he had a dummy. Once again, I realise YMMV.

[Arte]

"Jake Mysterio" > wrote in message
...
>> Human babies have a very real need to suck for comfort and we are
>> beginning to realise that a lack of comfort in infancy can cause
>> addictive behaviours in later life.
>
> Just because my baby doesnt have a dummy doesnt mean she is not comforted
> infact she is probably more comforted because I need to spend more one on
> one time to settle her when she is distressed rather than just shoving a
> dummy in her mouth. And she is a much better sleeper than my older child
> who had a dummy. Dummies are great things to throw out of cots. I used to
> spend half the night searching for the bloody things and I vowed this
> child would not have one. The only time she has had one is when she was in
> hospital at 6-8 weeks old and we were pressured into giving her one. She
> never had it again when she came home.
>
> Cheri

I think some kids are just more "oral" than others. H refused a dummy point
blank - and unless he could eat it, it didn't go in his mouth. Even when he
was at that stage where everything goes in the mouth... He never did.

And the same thing goes for dummy use and smoking as an adult - I had a
dummy and I don't smoke any more; my best friend is a former dummy sucking
current chain smoker! She also sucks pens.

Jodi

[Sue]

"Leanne" > wrote in message
> I wish people wouldn't take these as personal attacks... its not like one
of
> us wrote it and said 'this is how it HAS to be'. It is simply an article
> pointing out things that are starting to come out more and more in
research.

It's the need for them to feel superior. The feel like they are better
mothers because they do or don't do certain things and really we should just
try and support each other because every child is different and every parent
does things different depending on their child.
--
Sue (mom to three girls)

[A&G&K&H]

"Leanne" > wrote in message
...
> some stuff I read out of another article today, which I thought was pretty
> interesting -
>
> Dummy Myths and Facts.
snip
Leanne, I just wanted to thank you for posting this information. I also
think its pretty interesting.
Amanda

[Jake Mysterio]

I wasnt trying to comment on anyone but the research. Just that the way the
research paper was written it sounded as though dummies are the best thing
around. I dont think for us they are. My DS had one and his twin DD didnt. I
would have given one to DD2 if she had needed one. I wouldnt however let
them have it past 1year old as I just have a pet hate for kids who can walk
and talk but still have dummies hanging out of their mouths. That is not to
say that it isnt what your child might need, it is just that i dont like it.
I myself had a dummy to 3years old, mainly because my mother was lazy (her
words not mine) and couldnt be bothered trying to wean it off me while she
was pregnant with my brother. I weaned my brothers kids off their dummies
when they were 2 and 3 years olds when they stayed with me for a week. I
know many others keep them this long or longer but I just hate the things. I
really am not trying to offend people I just think like most others that it
should be a personal choice and the way the research was written makes it
sound as though I am doing a diservice to my daughter by not giving her one.

Cheri

[toypup]

"Jake Mysterio" > wrote in message
...
> was pregnant with my brother. I weaned my brothers kids off their dummies
> when they were 2 and 3 years olds when they stayed with me for a week. I
> know many others keep them this long or longer but I just hate the things.
> I really am not trying to offend people I just think like most others that
> it should be a personal choice and the way the research was written makes
> it sound as though I am doing a diservice to my daughter by not giving her
> one.

I would have been so upset were I your SIL. Weaning my kids off their
dummies would not have been your place, unless they asked you to do it.
Even if I had been planning to do it, I would have been furious that you did
it for me.

[Al]

Jake Mysterio wrote:
> I wasnt trying to comment on anyone but the research. Just that the way the
> research paper was written it sounded as though dummies are the best thing
> around. I dont think for us they are. My DS had one and his twin DD didnt. I
> would have given one to DD2 if she had needed one. I wouldnt however let
> them have it past 1year old as I just have a pet hate for kids who can walk
> and talk but still have dummies hanging out of their mouths. That is not to
> say that it isnt what your child might need, it is just that i dont like it.
> I myself had a dummy to 3years old, mainly because my mother was lazy (her
> words not mine) and couldnt be bothered trying to wean it off me while she
> was pregnant with my brother. I weaned my brothers kids off their dummies
> when they were 2 and 3 years olds when they stayed with me for a week. I
> know many others keep them this long or longer but I just hate the things. I
> really am not trying to offend people I just think like most others that it
> should be a personal choice and the way the research was written makes it
> sound as though I am doing a diservice to my daughter by not giving her one.
>
> Cheri
>
>
I was planning on weaning my DS(18mths) off his beloved dummy in the
next month while he isn't at childcare, I hate dummies in older kids but
my DS loves his so much I haven't had the heart to do it yet, I esp like
the fact he has something to comfort him when he is in childcare 2 days
a week ( did recently introduce a blankey bear thing which he loves to
replace his dummy for comfort) I wouldn't mind him just having his dummy
for bed atm he seeks it out during the day, Any tips on giving them up?
is it cold turkey or can I just tell him they are just for bed???
It was easy with DD, she got tonsilitis and refused it at 11 mths and we
didn't ever give it back (she had one briefly when DS was born but
that's another storey, at 3 it was easy to get rid of again)
Alley

[Jake Mysterio]

My brother is a single dad and he asked me to do it cause he just didnt know
how to get rid of them, quite frankly he didnt have the heart to do it to
them, he is the kind of person who hates to see kids upset.

Cheri

[Jake Mysterio]

Cold turkey is the way I did it with my DS (at 11months) and for my brothers
children (2 and 3 years) I also weaned the children I used to nanny for when
they were 3 and 4 years. Their mother was desperate of what to do cause the
oldest was starting school and still had a dummy. I believe in cold turkey
but then I am a person who doesnt think it hurts a child to cry it out
either and I know heap here just dont agree with that. I took them away and
told them they were too big for dummies now. And I had maybe 1or 2 hours of
crying on the first day(not all at once mind you) and 30mins the day after
by the 3rd day they didnt seem to even care about it. I know of others who
have cut the tip off of the dummy making it harder to suck on and each day
they cut slightly more off until eventually the child cant suck it anymore
or looses interest cause it is so hard to suck.

cheri

[Sue]

"Jake Mysterio" > wrote in message
> I wasnt trying to comment on anyone but the research. Just that the way
the
> research paper was written it sounded as though dummies are the best thing
> around. I dont think for us they are.

Okay. Your post just dripped of I'm better than everyone else because I sat
and comforted my babies instead of letting them have a pacifier. That's
Usenet for ya, tone is extremely hard to tell. I'm sorry for my snippiness.

>I just have a pet hate for kids who can walk and talk but still have
dummies >hanging out of their mouths.

I put it in the same category as breastfeeding. Many people breastfeed a
child that can walk and talk and it's more about comfort than the need for
nutrition, so if a child has a pacifier at a toddler age, then I see it as a
need for the comfort. Also, many many many parents, including myself limit
pacifiers to bedtime and naptime only. Two of my kids didn't end up using a
pacifier UNTIL they were 2-3 yrs old. How's that for backwards. They each
needed the extra comfort when I brought home their sibling. I decided for my
third that I wouldn't introduce a pacifier at all and thankfully she didn't
need the extra sucking.

>I just think like most others that it should be a personal choice and the
way the >research was written makes it sound as though I am doing a
diservice to my >
>daughter by not giving her one.

However, this article on pacifiers that Leanne posted said something about
not using one if you didn't want to.
--
Sue (mom to three girls)

[Ericka Kammerer]

Al wrote:

> I was planning on weaning my DS(18mths) off his beloved dummy in the
> next month while he isn't at childcare, I hate dummies in older kids but
> my DS loves his so much I haven't had the heart to do it yet, I esp like
> the fact he has something to comfort him when he is in childcare 2 days
> a week ( did recently introduce a blankey bear thing which he loves to
> replace his dummy for comfort) I wouldn't mind him just having his dummy
> for bed atm he seeks it out during the day, Any tips on giving them up?
> is it cold turkey or can I just tell him they are just for bed???

Sure, you can tell him they're just for bed. When he
gets up, tell him it's time to put his pacifier in bed. If
he wants it during the day, tell him that pacifiers are only
for bed and he can go and sit on his bed if he needs to use
his pacifier. That way, if he's really upset and needs it,
he has the option to go sit on his bed and use it. Most kids
will be way too busy playing and doing other things to spend
any appreciable amount of time sitting on their bed using
their pacifier.

Best wishes,
Ericka

[Jake Mysterio]

> I put it in the same category as breastfeeding. Many people breastfeed a
> child that can walk and talk and it's more about comfort than the need for
> nutrition, so if a child has a pacifier at a toddler age, then I see it as
> a
> need for the comfort. Also, many many many parents, including myself limit
> pacifiers to bedtime and naptime only.

For me it isnt the comfort or the dummy itself that I hate but more the fact
that I know it is just dripping in germs and the fact that I have seen what
they have done to some of my friends kids teeth and speech. My best friends
5 yearold can barely string a sentence together and what he does say you
cant understand and she has been told that it is because he has had a dummy
all day every day up until he started kinder. I have no problem if that is
the way you want to go, I am just saying for me I dont like them at that
age. And I guess night use only really doesnt bother me. It is the 4 year
olds you see at the shops that still have dummies hanging out of their
mouths.

Cheri

[toypup]

"Jake Mysterio" > wrote in message
...
> My brother is a single dad and he asked me to do it cause he just didnt
> know how to get rid of them, quite frankly he didnt have the heart to do
> it to them, he is the kind of person who hates to see kids upset.

Well then, that's okay. ;)

[toypup]

"Al" <Al@nospam> wrote in message
u...
> replace his dummy for comfort) I wouldn't mind him just having his dummy
> for bed atm he seeks it out during the day, Any tips on giving them up? is
> it cold turkey or can I just tell him they are just for bed???

It was easy to institute the dummy-only-in-bed rule. DS understood those
types of hard fast rules. But sometimes, he just wanted his dummy and he
would lay in bed for hours just so he could suck on it.

When DS was 3yo, DH had a talk with him and he agreed that he was getting
too old for dummies, so he gave them up. It was that easy.

Oh, and he did give them up earlier when I poked holes on the end of them.
That was an easy way to get him to give them up, but he was a wonderful
sleeper up until then and he would not sleep at all afterwards, so DH made
me go to the store and buy a whole new set of dummies. It took a month to
get him back to sleep like normal again.

[toypup]

"Ericka Kammerer" > wrote in message
...
> he has the option to go sit on his bed and use it. Most kids
> will be way too busy playing and doing other things to spend
> any appreciable amount of time sitting on their bed using
> their pacifier.

DS was not most kids. He slept about 15 hours per day, but he also spent a
few hours there relaxing just sucking on the pacifier.

[Jamie Clark]

"toypup" > wrote in message
m...
>
> "Jake Mysterio" > wrote in message
> ...
>> was pregnant with my brother. I weaned my brothers kids off their dummies
>> when they were 2 and 3 years olds when they stayed with me for a week. I
>> know many others keep them this long or longer but I just hate the
>> things. I really am not trying to offend people I just think like most
>> others that it should be a personal choice and the way the research was
>> written makes it sound as though I am doing a diservice to my daughter by
>> not giving her one.
>
> I would have been so upset were I your SIL. Weaning my kids off their
> dummies would not have been your place, unless they asked you to do it.
> Even if I had been planning to do it, I would have been furious that you
> did it for me.


Oh goodness, wouldn't bother me a bit, if the kids were 2 and 3. I'm not a
fan of kids that old with binky's anyway. Addie already has hers longer
than Taylor did, and is much more attached. If my sister or good friend had
them for a weekend or week, and when I picked them up told me that she was
done with the binky, I'd be thrilled! It's not like giving them the first
bit of solid food, or their first step or something!
--

Jamie
Earth Angels:
Taylor Marlys, 1/3/03 -- Who's got the Christmas spirit, singing all day
long, "You put one foot in front of the other, and soon you'll be walking
out the doooo-oooo-ooor!
Addison Grace, 9/30/04 -- My Little Ham, who smiles so big her eyes
disappear and she says, "Cheese" on command. Although it sounds more like
"eeeeeesssshhh"!

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