Crib advice and thoughts about co-sleeping please

[Morvak]

On co-sleeping (for lack of the proper word):

The wife and I want to try to have our newborn (due in May) sleep with
us. It's our first baby. When we're ready to go to bed for the night,
if we get a crib, we'd like to take him out and have him lay with us.
I hear its great for building confidence, and mom is more aware of
when to feed baby in middle of night, and all that.

Has anyone ever done this? We purchased (forget name) something that
is kinda of rectangular and padded soft that the baby will lay in when
he is between us to protect him from getting rolled on or smothered.

We're also looking for a crib.

Any advice? Also, if our baby takes to sleeping with us, do we still
need a crib? I assume so, for when he needs a nap, or to sleep when
we're not in bed..... just curious...

Thanks!

[[email protected]]

On Apr 2, 1:32 pm, "Morvak" > wrote:
> On co-sleeping (for lack of the proper word):
>
> The wife and I want to try to have our newborn (due in May) sleep with
> us. It's our first baby. When we're ready to go to bed for the night,
> if we get a crib, we'd like to take him out and have him lay with us.
> I hear its great for building confidence, and mom is more aware of
> when to feed baby in middle of night, and all that.
>
> Has anyone ever done this? We purchased (forget name) something that
> is kinda of rectangular and padded soft that the baby will lay in when
> he is between us to protect him from getting rolled on or smothered.
>
> We're also looking for a crib.
>
> Any advice? Also, if our baby takes to sleeping with us, do we still
> need a crib? I assume so, for when he needs a nap, or to sleep when
> we're not in bed..... just curious...
>
> Thanks!

First of all, congratulations.

Co-sleeping may be great for the baby but not so much for a mother
especially if your wife woh full time. I co-slept with both of mine
because by some sheer chance they both refused to sleep anywhere
except next to me. I hated it, I had back problems, I couldn't get
much sleep etc. The transition to their own bed was very difficult.
The younger one (2.5yo) is still having issues sleeping through the
night because she prefers to sleep in my bed rather than in her own.

I'm in a minority on this topic. You will hear lot of positive
responses to this. Goodluck with whatever choice you make.

[Anne Rogers]

> On co-sleeping (for lack of the proper word):
>
> The wife and I want to try to have our newborn (due in May) sleep with
> us. It's our first baby. When we're ready to go to bed for the night,
> if we get a crib, we'd like to take him out and have him lay with us.
> I hear its great for building confidence, and mom is more aware of
> when to feed baby in middle of night, and all that.

> Any advice? Also, if our baby takes to sleeping with us, do we still
> need a crib? I assume so, for when he needs a nap, or to sleep when
> we're not in bed..... just curious...

hmm, I've not been a regular co sleeper, so I'm no expert, but from reading
what other people have said, it often seems that babies who cosleep won't
sleep separately, so the crib becomes unnecessary.

I'd suggest something like an "arms reach cosleeper" as an alternative, it
means baby is level with the bed, on moms side usually. They also usually
have a rail you can put in place for times you want to use it as a crib.

Anne

[Ericka Kammerer]

Morvak wrote:
> On co-sleeping (for lack of the proper word):
>
> The wife and I want to try to have our newborn (due in May) sleep with
> us. It's our first baby. When we're ready to go to bed for the night,
> if we get a crib, we'd like to take him out and have him lay with us.
> I hear its great for building confidence, and mom is more aware of
> when to feed baby in middle of night, and all that.
>
> Has anyone ever done this? We purchased (forget name) something that
> is kinda of rectangular and padded soft that the baby will lay in when
> he is between us to protect him from getting rolled on or smothered.
>
> We're also looking for a crib.
>
> Any advice? Also, if our baby takes to sleeping with us, do we still
> need a crib? I assume so, for when he needs a nap, or to sleep when
> we're not in bed..... just curious...

Lots of people co-sleep. If you do so, you want
to be careful about the rules for safe co-sleeping. Google
will turn up many sites that list what you need to do.
The only thing that makes me raise a bit of an
eyebrow is that it sounds like you want to be able to
switch back and forth between crib and co-sleeping. This
is not always easy to do. Some babies are flexible, but
others will develop a strong preference for sleeping with
you and will refuse to sleep alone at all. Others may
be creatures of routine and willing to nap in a crib but
won't sleep alone at night (or whatever pattern you establish).
If you start co-sleeping, you should realize that those are
possible outcomes. If you are not willing to find yourself
in a position where baby won't sleep without one of you
for some period of time, you may not want to start down
the path of co-sleeping on a regular basis.
As far as whether you need a crib goes, it really
depends on how things work out for you. You do have to
have a safe place for baby to sleep. Within a few months,
you won't be able to rely on baby staying in one spot
on a bed. Some people who co-sleep find that they never
use a crib, but then they do have to make other arrangements
to ensure safety (either always sleeping with the child,
or creating a baby-safe space for solo sleep).

Best wishes,
Ericka

[Larry Mcmahan]

In article . com>,
says...
> On co-sleeping (for lack of the proper word):

You know, as far as I know, that is the proper word. At least it's the
one most of the posters on m.k.p use!
>
> The wife and I want to try to have our newborn (due in May) sleep with
> us. It's our first baby. When we're ready to go to bed for the night,
> if we get a crib, we'd like to take him out and have him lay with us.
> I hear its great for building confidence, and mom is more aware of
> when to feed baby in middle of night, and all that.

OK. I can say that we co-slept with both our babies, and we never owned
a crib. That may make me a little "biased" but I think it works quite
well.
>
> Has anyone ever done this? We purchased (forget name) something that
> is kinda of rectangular and padded soft that the baby will lay in when
> he is between us to protect him from getting rolled on or smothered.

I have not heard of this, and I am not sure I think it is necessary, and
maybe not effective. There are some fairly common-sense rules for
co-sleeping which keep the baby safe, and they are generall enough. For
example, no soft blankets to cover the baby, no pillows, baby should
be in a sleeper (onesie) to keep warm, parents should not drink, smoke
or take sleeping pills while co-sleeping. Maybe someone who has access
to a website talking about how to safely co-sleep can post a link.
>
> We're also looking for a crib.

If you want to co-sleep, but you also want some space in the bed for
yourself from time to time, you might look into the Arms Reach
Co-Sleeper. This fits on one side of the bed, and allows you to
sleep with the baby on one side of you (instead of the middle) without
fear os the baby falling out of the bed (we co-slept without it, and
we never had the baby fall out of the bed while we were sleeping with
it).
>
> Any advice? Also, if our baby takes to sleeping with us, do we still
> need a crib? I assume so, for when he needs a nap, or to sleep when
> we're not in bed..... just curious...

When our babies napped we simply put them on the bed and put pillows
on the floor around the bed. One fell out once, and the other twice,
but after that they learned where the edge of the bed was. :-) Neither
was ever hurt. If this makes you too nervous, you can place a matress
on the floor for the nap. Heck, you can simply place the matress where
you sleep on the floor if you want to.
>
> Thanks!
>
>
Welcome,
Larry

I found some links on safe co-sleeping, but the stupid newsreader I am
using (Gravity) won't let me paste them here. I did a Yahoo search on
"safe co-sleeping". Try it.

[Boliath]

wrote:
>
> First of all, congratulations.
>
> Co-sleeping may be great for the baby but not so much for a mother
> especially if your wife woh full time. I co-slept with both of mine
> because by some sheer chance they both refused to sleep anywhere
> except next to me. I hated it, I had back problems, I couldn't get
> much sleep etc. The transition to their own bed was very difficult.
> The younger one (2.5yo) is still having issues sleeping through the
> night because she prefers to sleep in my bed rather than in her own.
>
> I'm in a minority on this topic. You will hear lot of positive
> responses to this. Goodluck with whatever choice you make.

I hear you. My 2.5 year old still ends up in our bed most nights, nobody
is getting a good nights sleep except for him. I'm 5.5 months pregnant
and could really do with some quality sleep.

Saying that though, I loved co-sleeping with him at first, I still do in
many ways, it's lovely to snuggle and cuddle. It was great for
breastfeeding when he was tiny, but played havoc with my back.

The snuggle nest I think you're talking about seems good, I didn't use
one but a friend did for one of her twins while the other was in an arms
reach attached to the bed. For naps we just put him in our bed with
pillows on the floor. He did fall off a couple of times when he was a
bit older, so I took to napping with him when I could, at weekends
especially. During the week he was and is in daycare so slept in a cot
like all the other kids.

Congratulations on your upcoming birth and best of luck.

[Larry Mcmahan]

In article . com>,
says...
> On co-sleeping (for lack of the proper word):
>
> The wife and I want to try to have our newborn (due in May) sleep with
> us. It's our first baby. When we're ready to go to bed for the night,
> if we get a crib, we'd like to take him out and have him lay with us.
> I hear its great for building confidence, and mom is more aware of
> when to feed baby in middle of night, and all that.
>
> Has anyone ever done this? We purchased (forget name) something that
> is kinda of rectangular and padded soft that the baby will lay in when
> he is between us to protect him from getting rolled on or smothered.
>
> We're also looking for a crib.
>
> Any advice? Also, if our baby takes to sleeping with us, do we still
> need a crib? I assume so, for when he needs a nap, or to sleep when
> we're not in bed..... just curious...
>
> Thanks!
>
>
I tried posting a response to this, but the post disappeared when I
cancelled the spell checker. If it does not come through I will post
again.

I suggest doing a Yahoo search on "safe co-sleeping."

Larry

[cjra]

On Apr 2, 1:32 pm, "Morvak" > wrote:
> On co-sleeping (for lack of the proper word):
>
> The wife and I want to try to have our newborn (due in May) sleep with
> us. It's our first baby. When we're ready to go to bed for the night,
> if we get a crib, we'd like to take him out and have him lay with us.
> I hear its great for building confidence, and mom is more aware of
> when to feed baby in middle of night, and all that.

We've been co-sleeping for almost nine months and loving it (mostly).

>
> Has anyone ever done this?

See http://www.nd.edu/~jmckenn1/lab/faq.html for more info.

> We purchased (forget name) something that
> is kinda of rectangular and padded soft that the baby will lay in when
> he is between us to protect him from getting rolled on or smothered.

We had this and used it until DD was about 12 weeks, by then she'd
outgrown it and it was no longer practical anyway. We both liked it -
DH was a little nervous about the cosleeping at first, so this
contraption gave him time to get used to having DD in bed without the
worry of rolling onto her (likely he never would have, but it made him
relax more). Also, it took awhile to learn to nurse lying down, so I
had to sit up anyway, so pulling her up out of the thing over the
sides was no big deal. Around the time she outgrew it we were getting
better at nursing lying down, so picking her up out of it became
annoying. By then I could just turn her on her side to nurse without
moving.

> We're also looking for a crib.

We didn't buy a crib until DD was 6 months. Our main reason was that
we want to have another kid, and we can' t manage two babies in our
bed, and I didn't want to kick DD out when the new one arrived (not pg
yet, just TTC). So figured we'd get her used to her own sleeping space
gradually. We don't use it a lot, but I am glad we have it. Sometimes
I put her to sleep there, other times I nurse her to sleep in our bed.
If she's still sleeping in the crib, I don't move her. I leave her
there til she wakes up, then I bring her to bed. I'd say she starts
off the night in the crib about 2-3nights out of 7, max. It's also
useful for napping, esp now that she's more mobile. Before 6 months I
could leave her to nap on the bed and tho she'd spin around, she
wouldn't move from the spot. Now she'll move all over the bed, so the
crib keeps her contained when we're not there with her.


> Any advice? Also, if our baby takes to sleeping with us, do we still
> need a crib? I assume so, for when he needs a nap, or to sleep when
> we're not in bed..... just curious...

No, you don't need a crib. Might be nice to have, but certainly not a
necessity. Our crib becomes a toddler bed, so it can be used for a few
years.
However, if you get a pack-n-play with a bassinet, you can use that as
the occasional crib for awhile. I'm not sold on it tho. It was useful
for awhile, but honestly we've hardly used it.

[cjra]

On Apr 2, 1:59 pm, " > wrote:
> On Apr 2, 1:32 pm, "Morvak" > wrote:
>
>
>
>
>
> > On co-sleeping (for lack of the proper word):
>
> > The wife and I want to try to have our newborn (due in May) sleep with
> > us. It's our first baby. When we're ready to go to bed for the night,
> > if we get a crib, we'd like to take him out and have him lay with us.
> > I hear its great for building confidence, and mom is more aware of
> > when to feed baby in middle of night, and all that.
>
> > Has anyone ever done this? We purchased (forget name) something that
> > is kinda of rectangular and padded soft that the baby will lay in when
> > he is between us to protect him from getting rolled on or smothered.
>
> > We're also looking for a crib.
>
> > Any advice? Also, if our baby takes to sleeping with us, do we still
> > need a crib? I assume so, for when he needs a nap, or to sleep when
> > we're not in bed..... just curious...
>
> > Thanks!
>
> First of all, congratulations.
>
> Co-sleeping may be great for the baby but not so much for a mother
> especially if your wife woh full time. I co-slept with both of mine
> because by some sheer chance they both refused to sleep anywhere
> except next to me. I hated it, I had back problems, I couldn't get
> much sleep etc.


As another WOHM, there's no way I'd have managed this long if DD
didn't sleep with us. She nurses a minimum of 3x/night, and for a few
weeks was up every hour. I'd have been a zombie by now, or would have
had to quit my job.

That said, I do believe she probably wakes a bit more than if she was
always in a crib in another room, but when we do put her in the crib,
she wakes for the 3x, and when I slept in another room (DH slept with
her), she still woke those 3x to nurse.

[Nikki]

"Morvak" > wrote in message
oups.com...

Hi and Congrats :)

> I hear its great for building confidence, and mom is more aware of
> when to feed baby in middle of night, and all that.

In the beginning it really does make the middle of the night feeds a lot
easier.

> Has anyone ever done this?

I did. I didn't have the little nest you are talking about but they seem
nice, especially with two adults in the bed. Some on else posted the rules
of safe co-sleeping and I did follow all those.

> Any advice? Also, if our baby takes to sleeping with us, do we still
> need a crib?

My first son never used the crib at all. He napped on the regular bed. He
was not a big roller and didn't move around much. When he started we just
taught him how to get off the bed feet first. We also had a small house so
I could here him right when he woke up. He was my first so I could go to
him immediately.

As with crib sleeping - co-sleeping has its good points and not so good
points. Many babies transition from co-sleeping to crib with relative ease
but there are many that do not. I co-slept with my first two babies and
they became very attached to it. They did not sleep unless I was beside
them and they were toddlers/preschoolers when we started making the
transition and it was still hard. My only advice would be to go into
co-sleeping knowing that.


--
Nikki, mama to
Hunter 4/99
Luke 4/01
Brock 4/06
Ben 4/06

[Irrational Number]

Morvak wrote:

> On co-sleeping (for lack of the proper word):
>
> The wife and I want to try to have our newborn (due in May) sleep with
> us. It's our first baby.

With Pillbug, he started the evening in the crib,
then when he woke up around midnight, we brought
him into our bed.

With Rocky, I brought him into our bed from the
moment he was born. He's now 22mo and still
sleeping with me and I would not have it any
other way.

Make sure you do all the safety things: no waterbed,
do not drink or take medications that make you
sleepy, no heavy blankets, no pillows around baby.
No cracks where baby can get caught. Just be safe.

I love cosleeping. It's not for everyone, but
it works wonderfully for us. I get up after Rocky
falls asleep and I still do things around the house.
I just put a big pillow so that he does not roll
off the bed.

Rocky still naps in his crib in the daytime.

-- Anita --

[Leslie]

With five kids, I've done all kinds of things . . . here's what I've
come to in the end, and what we much prefer:

We had the crib up for #4 but never used it at all. He did sleep in
the cradle some. For #5 we finally went all the way. Both crib and
cradle stayed in the attic. We took our bed frame down and put our
mattresses on the floor. We follow all the safety rules, but we don't
have a snuggle nest or an arm's reach or anything like that. For
naps, baby is on our bed with pillows around her, then when necessary
we teach feet first as others have said.

I don't find the transition from our bed to toddler bed that
difficult, if you are willing to be patient about it. #5 is two.
When she turned two, we put a mattress on the floor next to our bed
and began nursing her to sleep there or nursing her to sleep and
placing her there. When she wakes, sometimes after a couple of hours,
sometimes almost in the morning, she comes into bed to nurse with us.
I am now not automatically offering to nurse but starting to try to
cuddle her back to sleep if she will go for that.

What we did eventually with #4 was to move the mattress to his
bedroom, then start going to him when he woke instead of bringing him
to us. Eventually I would go in and tell him I would nurse him in a
second, and he'd fall back asleep. Soon he was not waking any more.
Then when he turned four, we sold him on moving into a "big kid" bed.
This was easy for everyone. He now asks to go to bed at night.

We will probably move #5 into another room when she is 3. I'm in no
hurry, and she's going to have to share with someone so that
complicates matters.

Co-sleeping is great. I could not imagine parenting any other way.

Leslie

[LORRAINA SIMMONS]

Well, with our first child, I moved to the spare bedroom since my
husband is such a deep sleeper who insists on sprawling his body across
the entire bed, lol.

I had a bassinet with a drop down side, so that the basset matress came
up level to my bed.

I always started out "bedtime" with my son being put to sleep in the
bassinet. After nighttime feeding he slept with me, usually sprawled on
my chest.

At 4 months old, I started putting him back to sleep in his bassinet
immediatly after each feeding. He fussed for the first week during this,
but now he is 13 months, and been sleeping on his own with no problem.

As for cribs I recommend, we got a transitional 3-stage. Crib to toddler
bed (with rails) to normal. I don't remeber it's name, but it came with
a set of dresser drawers attached and shelving along the side. We paid
180 dollars at Wal-Mart for it, and have and no problems so far. My son
is very rambuctious in his sleep, tossing, turning, rolling, kartwheels
and he has yet to get himself stuck between the wooden side slates or
the mattress.

Hope that helps, Good Luck on the little one.