Don't mess with the irritable pregnant chick ;)

[M Wayne]

So I was at the drugstore today and the clerk said to me "Is your baby due
soon?" and I replied "In a little more than 5 weeks."
Well, she paused for a moment and asked, "Oh, are you having one or two?"
It was all I could do not to smack her. But I calmly replied, "Just one"
although I think it was clear to her that our conversation was over. :)
Grrrr.....

--
Melissa
Baby Harry due 7/27/04
(remove "NOSPAM" to reply)

[zolw]

:)) I feel for you. :))

I was at Walmart & the lady at the cash register asked me when I was
due. (then I had a little more than 6 weeks to go) So I told her so &
she said one or two? I said no only one (thank God it doesn't irritate
me that much) & smiled. She said:" Oh cause it looks more like you are
due in 6 minutes". It's like she had to add a joke. People just think
that it's funny. Don't get upset, just smile/laugh at them. Try to think
of it as a comedy & you are the comedian. At least you amuse people ;)

M Wayne wrote:

> So I was at the drugstore today and the clerk said to me "Is your baby due
> soon?" and I replied "In a little more than 5 weeks."
> Well, she paused for a moment and asked, "Oh, are you having one or two?"
> It was all I could do not to smack her. But I calmly replied, "Just one"
> although I think it was clear to her that our conversation was over. :)
> Grrrr.....
>

[Vicky Bilaniuk]

M Wayne wrote:

> Well, she paused for a moment and asked, "Oh, are you having one or two?"

You know, I've been starting to get this, too, yet my belly is a little
on the small side for how far along I am, due to my height (although
I've definitely gained a lot of weight in general, unfortunately, but I
don't see why that would make people think twins). People keep asking
me if I'm sure I'm not having twins. Total strangers, people who know
me, family, and so on. It's all very weird. Let's just say that if I
end up with twins, I, my midwife, my doctor, and the ultrasound folks
will all be very shocked.

In my case, I think people keep assuming that I'm having twins by how
much pain I've had and how tired I am. I guess these are normal
symptoms for someone carrying twins?

[Amy]

At least you could walk out. I had the most appalling hairdresser the other
day. She was a complete moron. She joked about how I wasn't to go into
labour on the chair (it's still another three weeks to my due date) and then
proceeded to make the most inane chatter for the next half hour or so. She
had a complete mistrust of Asians, and disliked vegetarians because she'd
flatted with one who ate fish eyes (I'm a vegetarian who happens to like
Asian food). I commented that that didn't sound very vegetarian to eat fish
eyes, and she nonchalantly informed me that, "No, it's _vegans_ who don't
eat fish" *rolls eyes*.
She asked me if it was my first pg, and I explained that we had a son but
he'd died. She didn't listen to my reply, because later she asked how old my
son was, and I said "He would have been about 19 months". She feigned a look
of horror, and said how sorry she was (BTW I didn't mind & told her this, I
mean hair salons are noisy places and mistakes happen) but then she asked
how old he was when he'd died. Once I explained he was stillborn, her whole
attitude changed. She told me how when "things like this happen, it's
because Mother Nature had her reasons"! I could not think of a good comeback
to that, especially to someone who was holding sharp scissors so close to my
neck, so I spent the rest of the appointment in just about total silence.
And the cut looked nothing like the photo she'd shown me. Next time I'm
paying the extra $6.00 to see my regular hairdresser.

"M Wayne" > wrote in message
...
> So I was at the drugstore today and the clerk said to me "Is your baby due
> soon?" and I replied "In a little more than 5 weeks."
> Well, she paused for a moment and asked, "Oh, are you having one or two?"
> It was all I could do not to smack her. But I calmly replied, "Just one"
> although I think it was clear to her that our conversation was over. :)
> Grrrr.....
>
> --
> Melissa
> Baby Harry due 7/27/04
> (remove "NOSPAM" to reply)
>
>

[Chotii]

"Vicky Bilaniuk" > wrote in message
. ..
> M Wayne wrote:
>
> > Well, she paused for a moment and asked, "Oh, are you having one or
two?"
>
> You know, I've been starting to get this, too, yet my belly is a little
> on the small side for how far along I am, due to my height (although
> I've definitely gained a lot of weight in general, unfortunately, but I
> don't see why that would make people think twins). People keep asking
> me if I'm sure I'm not having twins. Total strangers, people who know
> me, family, and so on. It's all very weird. Let's just say that if I
> end up with twins, I, my midwife, my doctor, and the ultrasound folks
> will all be very shocked.
>
> In my case, I think people keep assuming that I'm having twins by how
> much pain I've had and how tired I am. I guess these are normal
> symptoms for someone carrying twins?

The reason, I think, is that most people see few enough pregnant women that
they forget how big we should be at certain stages. For that matter, *I*
tended to forget how big I would get at various stages, so that by 6 months
I was always convinced I was as big as full term, and I still had 3 months
go to!

As for carrying twins, well, I had very little back pain with my twins (more
after the babies were born, actually). I don't remember excessive exhaustion
either (after the first 3 months). But then these things fade in the memory.


--angela

[A&G&K]

"Amy" > wrote in message
...
> At least you could walk out. I had the most appalling hairdresser the
other
> day. She was a complete moron. She joked about how I wasn't to go into
> labour on the chair (it's still another three weeks to my due date) and
then
> proceeded to make the most inane chatter for the next half hour or so. She
> had a complete mistrust of Asians, and disliked vegetarians because she'd
> flatted with one who ate fish eyes (I'm a vegetarian who happens to like
> Asian food). I commented that that didn't sound very vegetarian to eat
fish
> eyes, and she nonchalantly informed me that, "No, it's _vegans_ who don't
> eat fish" *rolls eyes*.
> She asked me if it was my first pg, and I explained that we had a son but
> he'd died. She didn't listen to my reply, because later she asked how old
my
> son was, and I said "He would have been about 19 months". She feigned a
look
> of horror, and said how sorry she was (BTW I didn't mind & told her this,
I
> mean hair salons are noisy places and mistakes happen) but then she asked
> how old he was when he'd died. Once I explained he was stillborn, her
whole
> attitude changed. She told me how when "things like this happen, it's
> because Mother Nature had her reasons"! I could not think of a good
comeback
> to that, especially to someone who was holding sharp scissors so close to
my
> neck, so I spent the rest of the appointment in just about total silence.
> And the cut looked nothing like the photo she'd shown me. Next time I'm
> paying the extra $6.00 to see my regular hairdresser.
>
OMG - I would have had a hard time not to have slapped her! I know people
are searching for something to say when they speak such blather about a
miscarriage or a stillbirth .... but when somebody said the same thing to me
after my m/c, I told them that Mother Nature could just go and shove her
"reasons" up her @rse. Probably a very mean response from me, but I didn't
really care and at least I didn't cry (which was response option B).

Amanda

--
DD 15th August 2002
1 tiny angel Nov 2003
EDD 19th August 2004

[A&G&K]

"M Wayne" > wrote in message
...
> So I was at the drugstore today and the clerk said to me "Is your baby due
> soon?" and I replied "In a little more than 5 weeks."
> Well, she paused for a moment and asked, "Oh, are you having one or two?"
> It was all I could do not to smack her. But I calmly replied, "Just one"
> although I think it was clear to her that our conversation was over. :)
> Grrrr.....
>
> --
> Melissa
> Baby Harry due 7/27/04
> (remove "NOSPAM" to reply)
>
>

I have to say this doesn't really bother me ... but this is my 2nd full
pregnancy and I am a lot bigger and am carrying a lot more in front than I
did with DD. Because I'm above average height, I didn't even look pregnant
until about 6.5 months last time. On the down side, I weigh slightly less
at the same stage this time, but cannot fit 2 pairs of my maternity pants
because of the beach ball than has crawled up my jumper!!

But, my best friend had a lovely baby girl almost a year ago, and comments
about whether she was in fact pregnant really hurt her - she is tall and
thin anyway and her baby was suffering from IUGR and was very small, and
such comments just made her sad. She blamed herself for her "pathetic
placenta" (as she put it) and was full of "if only I'd eaten more / better"
etc. .... but a year later, her tiny 35 week (but only 1.1 kg) baby girl is
a strapping almost-one-year-old, who piled on the weight as soon as she
reached the outside world and started hoeing into "Mummy's Milk" :)

I get far more PO'd at the people who see 31.5 weeks pregnant me struggling
to haul my grocery-laden shopping-trolley-with-22mo-in-the-toddler-seat down
the ramp to the car park and expect *me* to manoeuvre out of their
unencumbered way (even if I'm keeping to the left of the walkway).

Amanda

--
DD 15th August 2002
1 tiny angel Nov 2003
EDD 19th August 2004

[Mary W.]

M Wayne wrote:
> So I was at the drugstore today and the clerk said to me "Is your baby due
> soon?" and I replied "In a little more than 5 weeks."
> Well, she paused for a moment and asked, "Oh, are you having one or two?"
> It was all I could do not to smack her. But I calmly replied, "Just one"
> although I think it was clear to her that our conversation was over. :)
> Grrrr.....
>

Last pregnancy I stopped going to our local supermarket for
just this reason. I would get several comments each time
I went in, and frankly, I just didn't need to deal with
it. I was big, pregnant, hot and tired. So DH had to do
all the shopping near the end.

This pregnancy, I'm carrying lower and don't look as big.
I'm just over 34 weeks and haven't gotten any "you
must be having twins comments yet". Of course, I seem
to be getting visibly bigger every day, so I expect
them to come. I'm going to try very hard not to let
them bother me this time :)

And I agree with Angela. People just don't see that many
9 month pregnant women and tend to forget just how big
you do get in the end (heck at my birth class, one of
the women was 37-38 weeks and I was surprised
at how big you do get that far along. Little wake up
call for me (she wasn't abnormally big, just full term
big)).

Mary

[Sophie]

> The reason, I think, is that most people see few enough pregnant women
that
> they forget how big we should be at certain stages. For that matter, *I*
> tended to forget how big I would get at various stages, so that by 6
months
> I was always convinced I was as big as full term, and I still had 3 months
> go to!

Where do you lvie that tehre arne't many pregnant women? Come to a military
town - you'll see hundreds daily - lol.

I'm small for how far along I am (that's cos all my weight is behind me -
lol) and people are surprised it's so soon, and #4. I like shocking people
now.

> As for carrying twins, well, I had very little back pain with my twins
(more
> after the babies were born, actually). I don't remember excessive
exhaustion
> either (after the first 3 months). But then these things fade in the
memory.
>
>
> --angela

I only had one person convinced I was having twins. One man in Cuba when I
was pregnant with #1. I gained 40 lbs but was pretty big. It was hurtful
then, now I'd tell him where to go :)

[Donna Metler]

"A&G&K" > wrote in message
...
>
> "Amy" > wrote in message
> ...
> > At least you could walk out. I had the most appalling hairdresser the
> other
> > day. She was a complete moron. She joked about how I wasn't to go into
> > labour on the chair (it's still another three weeks to my due date) and
> then
> > proceeded to make the most inane chatter for the next half hour or so.
She
> > had a complete mistrust of Asians, and disliked vegetarians because
she'd
> > flatted with one who ate fish eyes (I'm a vegetarian who happens to like
> > Asian food). I commented that that didn't sound very vegetarian to eat
> fish
> > eyes, and she nonchalantly informed me that, "No, it's _vegans_ who
don't
> > eat fish" *rolls eyes*.
> > She asked me if it was my first pg, and I explained that we had a son
but
> > he'd died. She didn't listen to my reply, because later she asked how
old
> my
> > son was, and I said "He would have been about 19 months". She feigned a
> look
> > of horror, and said how sorry she was (BTW I didn't mind & told her
this,
> I
> > mean hair salons are noisy places and mistakes happen) but then she
asked
> > how old he was when he'd died. Once I explained he was stillborn, her
> whole
> > attitude changed. She told me how when "things like this happen, it's
> > because Mother Nature had her reasons"! I could not think of a good
> comeback
> > to that, especially to someone who was holding sharp scissors so close
to
> my
> > neck, so I spent the rest of the appointment in just about total
silence.
> > And the cut looked nothing like the photo she'd shown me. Next time I'm
> > paying the extra $6.00 to see my regular hairdresser.
> >
> OMG - I would have had a hard time not to have slapped her! I know people
> are searching for something to say when they speak such blather about a
> miscarriage or a stillbirth .... but when somebody said the same thing to
me
> after my m/c, I told them that Mother Nature could just go and shove her
> "reasons" up her @rse. Probably a very mean response from me, but I
didn't
> really care and at least I didn't cry (which was response option B).
>
> Amanda
>
That and the "God needed more angels in heaven" one-or the "Blessings will
come of this in the end". Grr....


> --
> DD 15th August 2002
> 1 tiny angel Nov 2003
> EDD 19th August 2004
>
>

[Amy]

"A&G&K" > wrote in message
...

> OMG - I would have had a hard time not to have slapped her! I know people
> are searching for something to say when they speak such blather about a
> miscarriage or a stillbirth .... but when somebody said the same thing to
me
> after my m/c, I told them that Mother Nature could just go and shove her
> "reasons" up her @rse. Probably a very mean response from me, but I
didn't
> really care and at least I didn't cry (which was response option B).
>
> Amanda
>
> --
> DD 15th August 2002
> 1 tiny angel Nov 2003
> EDD 19th August 2004

Nice one! I really wish I was the kind of person to think up comebacks or
retorts on the spot, and have the guts to say them. I tend to be the kind to
fume silently in the presence of stupidity, and the only thought going
through my head is "How is it possible that someone came to be this stupid,
and why did fate throw them in my path today?". There are numerous people,
mainly previous bosses and colleagues, who I should have slapped but didn't.
I did say to this woman after some time, that it was likely a placental
problem that caused my son's death, and they could find nothing wrong with
him. I think she gathered from my silence that she probably hadn't said the
right thing, but somehow I doubt it will stop her saying it to someone
else...sigh...

[Amy]

"Donna Metler" > wrote in message
...

> That and the "God needed more angels in heaven" one-or the "Blessings will
> come of this in the end". Grr....

*puke*

[M Wayne]

> I could not think of a good comeback
> to that, especially to someone who was holding sharp scissors so close to
my
> neck,

LOL ;)
Wow, how amazingly insensitive your hairdresser was...

--
Melissa
Baby Harry due 7/27/04
(remove "NOSPAM" to reply)

"Amy" > wrote in message
...
> At least you could walk out. I had the most appalling hairdresser the
other
> day. She was a complete moron. She joked about how I wasn't to go into
> labour on the chair (it's still another three weeks to my due date) and
then
> proceeded to make the most inane chatter for the next half hour or so. She
> had a complete mistrust of Asians, and disliked vegetarians because she'd
> flatted with one who ate fish eyes (I'm a vegetarian who happens to like
> Asian food). I commented that that didn't sound very vegetarian to eat
fish
> eyes, and she nonchalantly informed me that, "No, it's _vegans_ who don't
> eat fish" *rolls eyes*.
> She asked me if it was my first pg, and I explained that we had a son but
> he'd died. She didn't listen to my reply, because later she asked how old
my
> son was, and I said "He would have been about 19 months". She feigned a
look
> of horror, and said how sorry she was (BTW I didn't mind & told her this,
I
> mean hair salons are noisy places and mistakes happen) but then she asked
> how old he was when he'd died. Once I explained he was stillborn, her
whole
> attitude changed. She told me how when "things like this happen, it's
> because Mother Nature had her reasons"! I could not think of a good
comeback
> to that, especially to someone who was holding sharp scissors so close to
my
> neck, so I spent the rest of the appointment in just about total silence.
> And the cut looked nothing like the photo she'd shown me. Next time I'm
> paying the extra $6.00 to see my regular hairdresser.
>
> "M Wayne" > wrote in message
> ...
> > So I was at the drugstore today and the clerk said to me "Is your baby
due
> > soon?" and I replied "In a little more than 5 weeks."
> > Well, she paused for a moment and asked, "Oh, are you having one or
two?"
> > It was all I could do not to smack her. But I calmly replied, "Just one"
> > although I think it was clear to her that our conversation was over. :)
> > Grrrr.....
> >
> > --
> > Melissa
> > Baby Harry due 7/27/04
> > (remove "NOSPAM" to reply)
> >
> >
>
>

[M Wayne]

> At least you amuse people ;)

LOL - now I'm going to have to suppress my first reaction, which will be to
quote Joe Pesci in "Goodfellas" - "Am I your clown? I'm here to ****in'
amuse you?"

;)

--
Melissa
Baby Harry due 7/27/04
(remove "NOSPAM" to reply)
"zolw" > wrote in message
news:UFNAc.71401$HG.22595@attbi_s53...
> :)) I feel for you. :))
>
> I was at Walmart & the lady at the cash register asked me when I was
> due. (then I had a little more than 6 weeks to go) So I told her so &
> she said one or two? I said no only one (thank God it doesn't irritate
> me that much) & smiled. She said:" Oh cause it looks more like you are
> due in 6 minutes". It's like she had to add a joke. People just think
> that it's funny. Don't get upset, just smile/laugh at them. Try to think
> of it as a comedy & you are the comedian. At least you amuse people ;)
>
> M Wayne wrote:
>
> > So I was at the drugstore today and the clerk said to me "Is your baby
due
> > soon?" and I replied "In a little more than 5 weeks."
> > Well, she paused for a moment and asked, "Oh, are you having one or
two?"
> > It was all I could do not to smack her. But I calmly replied, "Just one"
> > although I think it was clear to her that our conversation was over. :)
> > Grrrr.....
> >
>

[nichole]

I must be the only person in the world who loved loved loved getting bigger and
bigger. I took pictures of my belly every week and would compare early ones
with later ones to see how much bigger I got. I thought it was funny when
people asked me if I was having twins or if I was due that day. Actually, I
thought it was the best when I was working at 39 weeks and my patients would
ask me when I was due. "Anytime." =) I thought I would have a giant baby and
she was only 7-7.

Perhaps it's because I lost 180 pounds a couple years ago (gastric bypass) and
this was the only time I was "allowed" to get big again.

But oh, there were *plenty* of others things for me to get irritable about.

Nichole
mom to 6 month old Salome
http://public.fotki.com/sealmyfate/salome-1/

[Sophie]

> I must be the only person in the world who loved loved loved getting
bigger and
> bigger. I took pictures of my belly every week and would compare early
ones
> with later ones to see how much bigger I got. I thought it was funny when
> people asked me if I was having twins or if I was due that day. Actually,
I
> thought it was the best when I was working at 39 weeks and my patients
would
> ask me when I was due. "Anytime." =) I thought I would have a giant baby
and
> she was only 7-7.
>
> Perhaps it's because I lost 180 pounds a couple years ago (gastric bypass)
and
> this was the only time I was "allowed" to get big again.
>
> But oh, there were *plenty* of others things for me to get irritable
about.
>
> Nichole
> mom to 6 month old Salome
> http://public.fotki.com/sealmyfate/salome-1/

I think it's the fact that it's probably the 3rd or 4th time the woman has
heard it that day. Everyone thinks their remark is clever and they're the
first to come with it, when it isn't and they aren't.

You hear "gee you sure have your hands full" 4 or 5 times in ONE shopping
trip and see if you don't want to say "no sh*t" in reply at some point.

[zolw]

:)) well yeah, if I let people get to me I will have the worst time of
my life, right? People are so insensitive. You know, when my friends see
my or my pics (which I have posted online), the first comment they have
is oh my Gosh, you have gained so much weight. I would go crazy if I let
their comments get to me, instead, I just laugh at it or try to brush it
off. I am glad I mae them feel better about themselves and that they are
not as fat as I am.


M Wayne wrote:
>>At least you amuse people ;)
>
>
> LOL - now I'm going to have to suppress my first reaction, which will be to
> quote Joe Pesci in "Goodfellas" - "Am I your clown? I'm here to ****in'
> amuse you?"
>
> ;)
>

[Vicky Bilaniuk]

Amy wrote:

> At least you could walk out. I had the most appalling hairdresser the other
> day. She was a complete moron. She joked about how I wasn't to go into
> labour on the chair (it's still another three weeks to my due date) and then
> proceeded to make the most inane chatter for the next half hour or so. She
> had a complete mistrust of Asians, and disliked vegetarians because she'd
> flatted with one who ate fish eyes (I'm a vegetarian who happens to like
> Asian food). I commented that that didn't sound very vegetarian to eat fish
> eyes, and she nonchalantly informed me that, "No, it's _vegans_ who don't
> eat fish" *rolls eyes*.
> She asked me if it was my first pg, and I explained that we had a son but
> he'd died. She didn't listen to my reply, because later she asked how old my
> son was, and I said "He would have been about 19 months". She feigned a look
> of horror, and said how sorry she was (BTW I didn't mind & told her this, I
> mean hair salons are noisy places and mistakes happen) but then she asked
> how old he was when he'd died. Once I explained he was stillborn, her whole
> attitude changed. She told me how when "things like this happen, it's
> because Mother Nature had her reasons"! I could not think of a good comeback
> to that, especially to someone who was holding sharp scissors so close to my
> neck, so I spent the rest of the appointment in just about total silence.
> And the cut looked nothing like the photo she'd shown me. Next time I'm
> paying the extra $6.00 to see my regular hairdresser.

Yikes! If that had been me, I would have changed the subject.

[Vicky Bilaniuk]

A&G&K wrote:

> I get far more PO'd at the people who see 31.5 weeks pregnant me struggling
> to haul my grocery-laden shopping-trolley-with-22mo-in-the-toddler-seat down
> the ramp to the car park and expect *me* to manoeuvre out of their
> unencumbered way (even if I'm keeping to the left of the walkway).

Hey, I've been getting a bit of this, too. I've noticed that people are
generally very polite and will treat me surprisingly nicely, but a lot
of them expect me to be able to move with the normal grace and precision
I would have when *not* in pain, heh heh. ;-) I usually end up bumping
into them, and *not* on purpose.

[Ericka Kammerer]

Vicky Bilaniuk wrote:


> In my case, I think people keep assuming that I'm having twins by how
> much pain I've had and how tired I am. I guess these are normal
> symptoms for someone carrying twins?
>

It has nothing to do with that. It's just that
the vast majority of people seem unable to remember just
how big normal pregnant women get by the end, so they
think everyone is having twins, no matter what size they
are.

Best wishes,
Ericka

[Unadulterated Me]

Ericka Kammerer wrote:

> Vicky Bilaniuk wrote:
>
>
>> In my case, I think people keep assuming that I'm having twins by how
>> much pain I've had and how tired I am. I guess these are normal
>> symptoms for someone carrying twins?
>>
>
> It has nothing to do with that. It's just that
> the vast majority of people seem unable to remember just
> how big normal pregnant women get by the end, so they
> think everyone is having twins, no matter what size they
> are.
>

And when someone actually is having twins they never believe you because
'you aren't big enough' you can't win ;-)

A

[H Schinske]

wrote:

>It has nothing to do with that. It's just that
>the vast majority of people seem unable to remember just
>how big normal pregnant women get by the end, so they
>think everyone is having twins, no matter what size they
>are.

Yup. I got asked if I was having twins *far* more often when I was pregnant
with my singleton. I think when I was pregnant with twins I was *so* darned big
people were scared to ask me anything! (It's not because I was on bedrest
instead of being out and about, either, as when I was in my last month I was no
longer much restricted and took walks to the coffee shop and so on almost every
day, and talked to quite a few strangers.)

--Helen

[Elle]

"Chotii" > wrote in message >...

> The reason, I think, is that most people see few enough pregnant women that
> they forget how big we should be at certain stages.

I live in a large city and I must see dozens of pregnant women every
day. Maybe it just seems like they are everywhere 'cause I've been
trying to get to that point for so long myself ;)

As to the OP, it's funny how people always feel the need to make a
comment/judgement though, isn't it. I don't know why they don't just
stick to 'oh how nice for you'.

Elle