What should I do? I think it's rude not to let the host know if you
are planning on attending or not. I also think it would be rude of me
to ask the parents if they are planning having their child attend the
party. Does RSVP mean "If you're not attending"?

RSVP DOES technically mean 'respond either way, but to many people it means
'respond only if you are going to come' and to many others it means,
unfortunately, 'respond only if you happen to think about it, and show up or
not as you decide 'and even if you DO RSVP yes, it is, apparently, perfectly ok
to just change your mind at the last minute and not show up anyway..."

I would call them. Explain that you hadn't heard from them yet and need to get
firm numbers for the party. If they are offended... well, THEY were the ones
who were obligated to respond first.

But yeah, I've been finding for years now that birthday party invites are
exercises in immense frustration. Many invitees don't respond at all. And of
the yes's, at least half end up being no-shows anyway.




Naomi
CAPPA Certified Lactation Educator

(either remove spamblock or change address to to e-mail
reply.)