"New York Jen" wrote in message
et...

"Jill" wrote in message
m...
Sorry this is a bit OT.

My grandfather passed away on this day a year ago....I'd never have
thought
a year later I'd be pregnant. I feel sad because he died 6 months after
our
wedding, he loved my husband, and he would have been so happy to meet my
baby. It was very devastating for me and I had blocked it out of my
thinking
until someone mentioned it to me, and now I am really sad and in
tears....he
loved all his great grandkids, and loved kids in general. He always
carried
Tootise Rolls and lollipops for the kids at church (he was a retired
minister). When he passed, I asked my mom to let me into his study so I
could just sit there and feel him and remember him and he still had a
bag
of
Tootsie Rolls on his desk. I can't even look at them anymore.

OMG, how do I stop crying? I can't stop....

Jill


((((JILL))))

It's normal to be sad when you are missing someone. I cried a lot during
both my pregnancies (and after) because my father passed away 8 years ago
and will never know my kids. I believe very strongly in spiritual
connections and I feel that my father is aware of my children and watches
over them. Since your grandfather was a spiritual man as well, I'm sure
he's around making sure you're ok and taking care of that lil critter
you're
growing.

You'll feel better tomorrow,

Jen


My dad passed away in Jan 2002 and one thing that makes me sad about this
pregnancy is that he won't be here with the new baby. He took care of my son
while I was in school and my husband was at work from the time my son was
about 12 weeks old until he went to daycare at 3 1/2 years of age. They had
a special relationship and my dad often told me he had never been happier
because he worked a lot when my brother and I were little and he missed out
on a lot. I feel some comfort in that I feel that he knows somehow in some
way though. I also feel sad for my baby-to-be that he or she will miss out
on that experience. I also wish my dad had lived longer so my son would
remember him better but at least we have some footage of him on video. I
still miss my dad so much and cry often. He died rather suddenly and I never
got to tell him how much I loved him and how much he meant to me and us. In
fact I gotta go get some tissues now cause I'm crying again.

--
Jenn
DS 06/26/98
1 tiny angel 11/03
EDD Early December 2004
--
Leader of the Cult of Worshippers of BiPolar Long-Haired Sexy Anime Guys
with Swords