) writes:
Catherine Woodgold wrote:

If we're gonna vent, let me tell you (again?) about my
experience on alt."support".depression. (quotations
marks added for sarcasm.)

I know that some groups have little tolerance for newbies, but I would
have expected a support ng to be better at making allowances. It
sounds like an unpleasant experience for you.

Yes, it was. Once it started, I considered just
forgetting about the whole thing, but thought that
if I tried to post an apology or something I might
end up getting over it faster. I got dug deeper and
deeper in before finally getting some friendly and
respectful replies that helped me.

Apparently, the correct way to begin to post on a.s.d.
is first to participate in some OFF-TOPIC threads, then
to announce publicly that one is depressed, and finally
very tactfully just maybe mention ways of dealing
with depression. This was not stated in the FAQ.
Possibly one of these days I'll get around to asking
them to include that in the FAQ, as apparently the
same thing happens to other people too from time to
time!!!

I am fascinated by newsgroup dynamics and observing how each group
forms its own culture. My impression is that most people are unaware
of the unspoken rules (which differ from group to group) yet
nevertheless use various mechanisms to enforce them. To a certain
extent, I would say that virtually every ng has "groupthink" so I see
some validity to Lyn's comments. On the other hand, I wouldn't single
out m.k as being an egregious case of it.

Yes, it can be quite interesting.

In spite of the fact that others from time to time
post a similar type of first post, the regulars thought
I ought to already know that wasn't the type of post
that was wanted. They said I should have read the
newsgroup for a while first, or read the FAQ, to find
out that that wasn't the type of first post wanted.
Yet, the FAQ doesn't say anything like that, and
reading the newsgroup you see a bunch of depressed
people who seem to want help, and a bunch of off-topic
posts. This thing about off-topic posts being
preferred was a total surprise to me. I thought:
if off-topic posts are tolerated, then surely my
on-topic post will be OK, because on-topic is preferred
to off-topic on newsgroups.

And I don't think their method of enforcement works
at all. It may make that particular person go away,
but does nothing to prevent other newbies from
coming along and doing the same thing (unless
they happen to come very close in time).

For years I've been thinking that one of these
days I would request that they change their FAQ
to try to help prevent that experience from
being repeated. But now I realize I probably
won't. I don't think there's a way of doing it
that wouldn't risk offending people or something.
Besides, maybe the group dynamics have changed
since then.


Jayne