I'm glad you are checking into things on the internet. Don't let them
wear you down. BTW, the time required to set up an IEP meeting after
a parent request is very short, so don't let time go by. Check back
this week. Also, be sure to ask that the counselor, whoever is in the
isolation room, etc--anyone who deals with or should be dealing
with--your son be there. Also, get a statement from his pediatrician
or whoever prescribed his meds, and his psychologist stating their
opinion of his ability to function in a classroom, and their
suggestions for modifications that will help him. IOW, go in well
prepared. Tell them the modifications YOU would like--ones that would
help you understand how he is doing in school behaviorally and
academically--such as a star card daily, and a positive comment daily,
so you can reinforce what they are doing at home. And ask for a
reevaluation in 2 months, to make sure everything is going as planned
by the team. If things are going well, you can always say you don't
need the meeting. But, because of what you have seen so far, you'd
like more frequent meetings for your son's sake. Check out a few
private schools that do offer programs to help children like your son
and mention that, if necessary, you will ask that he be sent to one of
those schools at the school district's expense if they are unable to
produce and follow an IEP that meets his specific needs. And be very
careful to keep everything in writing--no oral communications without
an accompanying written document. Let me know how things go!


"Ronni" wrote in message .. .
Thanks TM....I added some things below

"TeacherMama" wrote in message
m...
I wasn't ignoring you, Ronni. We have had some "interesting" things
going on at my school, too.

First of all, the reason for an IEP is NOT for the teacher's benefit,
nor for the rest of the children. Each point on the IEP is for the
benefit of the CHILD. That is not to say that it is ok for him to
disrupt the class--but the remedies laid out in the IEP need to
specify how they are helping the child.

Another point to remember is that medicine is not magic. The child
does not start taking meds and turn into a perfect student.

Seems like the school is stuck in the thinking of a 'miracle cure'.

All of
the behaviors developed before his diagnosis are still in place. The
medicine merely adjusts things in his brain so he is now capable of
the self-control necessary to learn the appropriate behaviors. This
takes time. The teacher does not have the expertise to say whether or
not medication has been taken--she is is not a doctor. She can only
comment on the behavior she saw. Shame on her for speaking to you
that way!

I got an apology, after having another SAD discussion with the
superintendent.
He was also VERY ignorant, called me a liar and such. Then he called me back
and apologized. He said he discussed things with my sons teacher and
principal
and the teacher actually admitted what happened just as I explained to him.
I told
him I appreciated the apology but there is still not reason for him or any
other school
official to talk to me or anyone the way they have.

Request (or demand, if it comes down to it) another IEP meeting, That
is your RIGHT.
I'm waiting onthe 'return' phone call about a 'good time' for everyone.

Have them clarify each point on the IEP, and how it
helps *your son*. Ask exactly what in-the-classroom modifications are
in place to help your child meet his IEP goals. Ask what he does in
the isolation room. Ask how it furthers *his* education, and/or what
is being done in that room to help him get control of his behavior
issues. Sitting twiddling his thumbs is not good enough. What active
instruction are they providing?

As for denying the McDonalds coupon, was his being denied the coupon a
stated consequence for unacceptable behavior? Or was it
spur-of-the-moment just because the teacher was angry?

The coupon thing was a spur of the moment. NOONE except the teacher knew
that the coupons would be handed out that day. When my son saw what they
were
he got excited, called out something along the lines of 'dont forget me one'
and therefore
he didnt get one because he called out.

Ask how that
punishment fit into his IEP goals. It's not right to punish because of
anger.

The superintendent says that his IEP states exactly what they are doing. I
asked if
it states that when the teacher has a bad day and gets frustrated with my
child then he
gets treated like crap,...he told me I should watch my mouth and remember
who I am
talking to.


Be sure to mention the incident where the child who assaulted your son
was not punished.

I mentioned it to the superintendent who asked the principal etc. and
everyone
is claiming to have no recolection of such an event. Funny huh?

Make sure that your objection to this is included in
the meeting notes, and get a copy of everything--immediately--don't
wait until "final copies are made." (Take your own notes, too) You are
creating a paper trail. From this point on, all communication should
be written.

Should have done that from the start. Thanks.

You want to keep track of all that is said. If they are
wise, they will realize what you are doing, and will pay far more
careful attention to the IEP. Because they KNOW what your rights are,
and the consequences for not following through. Don't let them back
you down. Good luck.

While getting 'reprimanded' by the superintendent in our first conversation
I calmly
explained everything to him (as best I could when he wasnt interupting me)
When
he said 'i refuse to listen to any more of this' I said 'my next step is a
lawyer and the
State board of Education' He then dropped his loud tone and listened. And
like I said
he called me back the next day and apologized. This past week I have been
looking
up some things on the internet, basically about where the line is drawn
between my
childs discipline in school, the attitude toward me (raised voices, being
called a liar etc) and who to go to for help above the superintendent and I
have learned something very interesting. The school was sued, quite a few
years ago, over a situation with a disabled girl whose rights under IDEA
were violated in some way. There werent too many details on it but it was
interesting to know that there is a pattern of some sort there.
Next we will have another IEP meeting but honestly, I don't expect much from
them. I don't know what the next step will be, all I do know is that my son
doesn't deserve the treatment he gets. I have inquired on home schooling and
should be receiving and admissions packet any day now. I am not 100% doing
that but I am getting the process started depending the outcome of our next
meeting.
Thanks for your help.