"Anne Rogers" wrote in message
...

First, he has to come to understand the stresses you are working under,
so he understands it is not HIM that is the cause of the lack of action
(always the guy's first thought until someone clues him in different),
but that it is sheer exhaustion on your point, and lack of time/energy
to actually do it and get enough rest to keep going.

really? my husband appears to assume it's entirely me and absolutely
nothing to do with him, he may have initially assumed this, but as time
goes on he's placed it entirely on to me. Problem is now, whenever he
mentions it, it comes across as simply for his pleasure, which of course
turns me off even more.

I accept that a lot of things are physical problems with me right now and
I really am working on them, but there is only so fast I can go, I've had
to work through a number of medical tests, probably surgery etc. but in
the mean time, I could use some patience and understanding. If he focussed
his energies on making himself someone any women would want to have sex
with (and I mean by actions, not necessarily looks, but equally, I
appreciate it if he shaves before trying to kiss me as being attacked by a
scrubbing brush is also a turn off!). Actions don't necessarily mean
pampering me, which to be fair, he has made a real effort with since
mother's days, but little things, like actually coming to bed, or if he
isn't coming, at least telling me that he has to work and being truthful
about when he will be there.

Rant over


I also find it irritating when I get "I'll do these jobs for you so later we
can..." when he wouldn't do the jobs otherwise. I then feel pressurised into
agreeing when sometimes I've earmarked that evening for something else.
Debbie