"Jeff" wrote in message
link.net...

"Stephanie" wrote in message
news:cPtOh.4208$5E3.2231@trndny01...
I am concerned about a child in my care at my family daycare. Normally it
would be up to Mom to pursue this with her ped. She is not going to do
this. I don't know why. I won't go on about my feelings about this Mom. I
cant tell if her actions are deliberately trying to hide something or if
she is the height of lazy. Suffice it to say this is not the first
unaddressed issue.

The first question that comes to mind is: "Why is this kid in your
daycare?"



Let me actually answer this as I see it. I am not the ideal care provider
for this child. I do not have the education or experience. Unfortunately for
this child, I appear to be way better than what he has had up until this
point. He has gone, in one short year, from being completely convinced he
could not use the toilet, to self toiletting. He has gone from unwilling
and/or unable to utter a word to speaking, albeit not very well for a 5yo.
He has gone from looking scared all the time to being able to play, handle
small conflicts with peers, share with his peers, express his feelings. He
has gone from beleiving that he cannot learn to *trying* to learn new words,
dressing himself, learn letters, colors and shapes. All of these things were
very difficult. He went from feeling a pariah to feeling part of the group.
While his learning disabilities are not addressed, and there are many things
I cannot give him, I do believe he is doing better here than he has ever
done anywhere else. And the *only* consideration to Mom when choosing a
provider is convenience for her. She chose me because I had openings.
Period.

It is a stress on me, though I beleive I am successfully managing the stress
so that it does not affect the rest of the team. I do believe that there is
going to be some upper limit of nonsense I am going to be willing and able
to tolerate. I already have to have the family on a *very*short leash where
payment is concerned, or they would stop paying me altogether.



It doesn't sound like it is a good match between you and the child. Both
of you may be better off if he is in someone else's care.



It would, indeed, be better for me. I do not beleive it would be better for
him. I know the provider who cared for him before me. There is one center in
our small town. They don't hire any more qualified folks than you will find
in family care. And really, none of us in family care (or center based care
for that matter) are required to have the depth of education necessary to do
this job properly. So I don't hold out much hope that he is going to luck
onto a situation that is better elsewhere.


Does that answer the question?


So. Little boy, 5yo. Has SOME kind of learning disability. It is as yet
unidentified. Per Mom, ped has never commented on his development
(despite the fact that at age 4 he had not uttered a single word ever).
My point to the backstory is that he is disadvantaged in some way, but I
don't know how. Oh another part of the backstory, he is chronically sleep
deprived. How do I say this without sounding like a total bitch? I guess
I don't. I risk it. He is a virtual wild animal at home. When he wants
something he grunts and whines. Throws himself on the floor. Mom does not
put him to bed really. She just tells him to get in bed where he plays
with toys and watches tv until he collapses, often around 11:00 or 12:00.
Then up to be to my house for 7:00. If I have him nap here, he is up even
later at home.

So. Every so often he will have a spell of vomitting. About once a week,
at snack time he will look green and even more tired than usual. Then he
will get sick one to three times and fall asleep, regardless of the chaos
around him.

There does not seem to be any corrolation with food, though I am very
concerned about a food allergy since they can go from benign to life
threatening in a short period of time.

Can shear exhaustion cause vomitting? I plan on calling my ped, but I
want to wait until afternoon when they are done with the morning rush.

Thanks for any thoughts.

I would either call child protective services or dismiss him from your
child care. Or both.

The reality is that this kid need specialized care that you can't give. He
should be in a preschool that can help him with his learning disability.
And it sounds like there are some issues concerning his care at home.

Jeff