beyond the pale wrote:

Yes, the more I think about it, the more I want to make an excuse out of the
shower, and just have a come-meet-baby party. Knowing people like I do,
though, people will still feel obligated to bring a gift. I looked up
etiquette and apparently it is poor etiquette to include something on an
invitation such as "Your presence is our gift" or something to let people
know not to feel obligated. So, how do you let them know NOT to worry about
it? Those who want to give a gift will anyway but I want to let people know
it should not feel like an obligation or a breach of etiquette not to.
People still sort of think like they do with birthday parties- they feel
they are going to come and participate in activities or food, so they should
show up with a gift.

Honestly, there's not a lot you can do. At some point,
people have to take responsibility for their own misconceptions.
The reason you don't say "no gifts" is that it's not your business
to tell other people what they can or cannot do. If they want to
get you a gift, that's their business, and your job is to receive
it gratefully in the spirit in which it was intended. If they
don't really want to get a gift but think they're obligated to
do so, well, it's not your job to teach them manners. The harder
you try, the more it looks like you really expected something
in the first place (if you didn't, why are you so insistent
that they don't have to?).
One way that's fairly effective is a surprise party.
If they don't know they're coming to a baby party, they won't
think to bring a gift ;-) That's sometimes hard to pull off,
though. You can reinforce the idea that a gift is not required
by not opening gifts that are brought at the party. If you
open gifts there, it makes people feel awkward about not bringing
a gift (and the fact that others have done so in the past is
part of what makes people feel squeamish about not bringing a
gift even when they know it's not technically necessary).
You can't fix other people's problems. All you can
do is keep your own nose clean and be gracious whatever happens.

Best wishes,
Ericka