Karen wrote:

Talk to me in about 8 years ;-) While I agree with you in theory,
you'll be
surprised how easy it is to get very, very busy with just a couple of
activities per child. Also, as you watch your child develop various
talents
and interests, it is hard to turn your back on those interests
(especially
if they promote things you want for your kids - exercise, quality
social
opportunities, building on inherent talents). My kids enjoy music
lessons,
scouting, and sports. Music lessons are once a week, scouting
involves two
meetings a month, one of them a Friday night, plus special weekend
activities. Sports often run in long (Little League) or short
segments
(parks and recreation soccer or t-ball, for example, that run in six
week
periods). Because my oldest takes piano, am I to deny him the Scout
experience that all his friends enjoy that only takes up a few
evenings per
month? Or do I say he can't do Little League, a physical activity he
loves?
I guess I just can't see the "one activity per semester" rule being
practical, even if in theory it seems to rightly put family before
activities. Quite frankly, I'd be afraid my son would throw in the
towel on
piano if it took away all other fun opportunites. But I'd hate him
to not
do piano at all just because he has scouts or has several week
periods where
he plays a sport. Almost every night, we have dinner together, but
occasionally we have those nights where it's just crazy .....it's
amazing
how all our practices and meetings always turn out to be on
Wednesdays! I
think it's possible to be rational about doling out activites without
insisting on boilerplate rules.....and I think our kids appreciate
our
flexibility and fairness. Sometimes we can do it and sometimes we
can't.
YMMV.

I hear you!!!

I think it's great to have general guidelines and to also be flexible.
I do have guidelines but otherwise let the children lead. DD12 *loves*
piano and she is getting quite good at it. I admire her dedication and
passion. We accomodate it happily.

DD10 took it for awhile, but never seemed to like to practice all that
much. So we next tried clarinet. Same story there - theoretically, she
likes the idea of taking music, but in practice, she's just not all
that into it like DD12 is, so we mutually decided to drop it.

DD10 really wanted to sign up for softball with her friends. So we
endured a season of that. At the end of the season, she was exhausted
and often on her very last thread. It was just too much - too many
practices during the week, and very long weekend games. The part she
did love was being on a team and with her friends; she wasn't
passionate about softball itself. At the end of the season, she made me
*promise* no matter how much she begged this year, I'd be the adult
(her words) and put my foot down and say no!!! This kid really knows
herself well, and knows she needs guidance and someone to set some
boundaries for her, because she doesn't do it well herself. She lets
her enthusiasm get the better of her, and then she finds herself stuck
in a commitment that makes her miserable.

And so I did put my foot down this year. Looks like we'll sign up for
tennis instead. The commitment is much more manageable (an hour and a
half per week), they keep you hopping, and her friends will also be
doing it. If she doesn't like it, she can quit after 4 weeks, no big
deal. I do keep trying her to try different things. Eventually, she'll
find one that really sticks.

jen