Who here is done?

XOR wrote:

Vicky Bilaniuk wrote in message ...

Sophie wrote:


I was just curious as to who here is finished having children?

If you're not done, how many do you think you *want*, and how many do you
think you'll *have*?

We know #4 will be it for us. It's how many we've always wanted.

Sophie
#4 due 7/18/04



Beats me if we're done after this one. ;-) I'm facing a slightly
different problem from most of the responses I've read: I'm happy with
one, DH wants tons. I'm willing to play the wait and see game, and see
how this one turns out. If things go OK (even better if things go
downright well), then I'll consider another. ;-) Poor DH... Every
time I tell him that I dreamed that we had 6 kids (or something like
that), he gets really, really excited. He comes from a big family, so
he thinks that bigger is better.


You're not my SIL are you? ;-) My brother is the same way, they have 3
and she is ok with that, but would have been ok with just 1. He kept
saying he was hoping for more, but I think 3 was their compromise .
My other brother has 9, but I think they're done.

3 didn't sound so bad, but then I got to your other brother. OMG 9?! I
can't even imagine that. ;-)

On Wed, 11 Feb 2004 12:23:42 -0500, "Sophie"
wrote:

I was just curious as to who here is finished having children?

I think we are. I would have loved a large family, but various
considerations like not finding the right man till I was in my mid-30s
and he was in his late 40s reduced my expectations. We agreed very
quickly that we wanted to have a child together, and have been
delighted with the result! It took me 4 goes to get here, and we're
both happy to stop where we are, especially as Bloke likes the idea of
retiring before he's 65.

Now, if we were to win the lottery it's possible we'd reconsider...
--
Linz
YB: 16 weeks, 15lbs 7oz

"rsitter" wrote in message
om...
"Sophie" wrote in message
...
I was just curious as to who here is finished having children?

If you're not done, how many do you think you *want*, and how many do
you
think you'll *have*?

We know #4 will be it for us. It's how many we've always wanted.

Sophie
#4 due 7/18/04


this one, #3, will be it for us. i'm a little sad that we won't ever
have a son, but not disappointed that we will have 3 girls. does that
make sense? we may end up with foster children once our children are
grown, though.

rsitter
mother of megan, 10, riley, 1, and chloe due in 6 1/2 weeks!


yep I am done after this one, I always only wanted 1 girl, got her and
instantly wanted another she was so great but that's our limit, tubal booked
with c/s so unless it fails....
Alissa

Vicky Bilaniuk wrote in message ...
XOR wrote:

Vicky Bilaniuk wrote in message ...

Sophie wrote:


I was just curious as to who here is finished having children?

If you're not done, how many do you think you *want*, and how many do you
think you'll *have*?

We know #4 will be it for us. It's how many we've always wanted.

Sophie
#4 due 7/18/04



Beats me if we're done after this one. ;-) I'm facing a slightly
different problem from most of the responses I've read: I'm happy with
one, DH wants tons. I'm willing to play the wait and see game, and see
how this one turns out. If things go OK (even better if things go
downright well), then I'll consider another. ;-) Poor DH... Every
time I tell him that I dreamed that we had 6 kids (or something like
that), he gets really, really excited. He comes from a big family, so
he thinks that bigger is better.


You're not my SIL are you? ;-) My brother is the same way, they have 3
and she is ok with that, but would have been ok with just 1. He kept
saying he was hoping for more, but I think 3 was their compromise .
My other brother has 9, but I think they're done.

3 didn't sound so bad, but then I got to your other brother. OMG 9?! I
can't even imagine that. ;-)


Fortunately his wife wanted a big family too . We were all surprised
at first as the numbers kept increasing - he's the oldest of 8 and
always seemed to have already had his fill of kids (not that he was
ever responsible for the rest of us in any way, but being the eldest,
*thought* he was ;-)). I think they're done, but haven't heard comment
either way. Youngest is about 3 now, oldest just turned 18. My SIL is
only 37, so still has some years left in her... I wouldn't mind if
they did since then our kids would have cousins closer in age, as all
my other sibs are done while I'm just starting (at age 35).

"Sophie" wrote in message ...
I was just curious as to who here is finished having children?

If you're not done, how many do you think you *want*, and how many do you
think you'll *have*?

We know #4 will be it for us. It's how many we've always wanted.

Sophie
#4 due 7/18/04

We are done. Had my tubes tied right after Madeline's birth. We had
always wanted two. Then when we went through the preterm labor and
NICU bit with Aaron, I said, "one is it. I can't go through this
agian." Then Aaron had (and still has) developmental delays, so I
really thought he would be it. Then he began walking and talking, and
the NICU memories blurred... and we tried again. But it was a high
risk pregnancy with activity restrictions and we needed a lot of help
from my MIL to take care of Aaron. I was lucky enough to only have to
do two weeks of bedrest this time; the dr had prepared us for worse.

Maddie's birth and these first few months with her have been so
wonderful we wish we could have more. But we did not want to put the
family through having to help us so much with Aaron. My parents have
health problems and can't keep up with him, so it largely fell on MIL.

So we are done, but having so much fun. I love having a little infant
again, and can't wait till she can play more.

Amanda, mom to Aaron 3 yrs and
Madeline 3 mos

I wouldn't mind if
they did since then our kids would have cousins closer in age, as all
my other sibs are done while I'm just starting (at age 35).

My sister is 9 yrs older then me but only got married 2 yrs before me then I
started having kids first. It's worked out great - her oldest is 3 weeks
younger than my 3rd and her 2nd will be 6 months older than my 4th. If she
had gotten married younger and had kids younger the cousins wouldn't really
care about seeing each other.

Sophie wrote:
I wouldn't mind if
they did since then our kids would have cousins closer in age, as all
my other sibs are done while I'm just starting (at age 35).


My sister is 9 yrs older then me but only got married 2 yrs before me then I
started having kids first. It's worked out great - her oldest is 3 weeks
younger than my 3rd and her 2nd will be 6 months older than my 4th. If she
had gotten married younger and had kids younger the cousins wouldn't really
care about seeing each other.



Yeah, I had one cousin who was very close to me in age, and we always
got along really well. I was one year older than her (almost to the
day, in fact).

It's weird, though. You might think that she is a first cousin. Nope.
;-) Second cousin. Her mother, or my mother's aunt, is younger than
my mother. My grandmother, who is the link in all of this, comes from a
HUGE family (16 kids, IIRC). They are the only experience I have with
huge families, and unfortunately, they fight and compete a lot (even
now, with half of them retired or nearly so), so the experience has not
been the best. DH's largish family isn't quite as bad, though, so when
we're all together, I find them remarkably civilised (which shocks them
all).

"Sophie" wrote
If she
had gotten married younger and had kids younger the cousins wouldn't
really
care about seeing each other.


I wasn't close to my cousins and had no siblings to be close to, either, I
always wanted for my child to have a big family of close cousins and
siblings. It doesn't look like it is going to happen with cousins.....I have
one sibling, a brother who is almost 34 and will probably never marry or
have kids, the perennial bachelor. My husband has 2 brothers out of town.
One is not married and youngish, 24, doesn't look like he will marry soon
much less have kids soon but he probably will one day I am sure. His other
brother is married and "done" with his kids- they have a 7 year old and a 2
year old. So when my baby is born the 2 year old (boy) will be the only
cousin even close to her age and only 1 of 2 cousins.

Now, siblings, I don't know! I want more and I would like them close in age
, but I am not going to put pressure on myself so I will be devasated if it
doesn't happen. If I start making all these big plans, I will be
disappointed so I am trying to just go with the flow and let what works out
happen. My husband doesn't want to adopt for personal reasons. I myself
would love to adopt but I respect his feelings.

I was a VERY shy, timid child, and I am probably not correct in this, but I
always FELT like I would have been less lonely if I had cousins and siblings
to be close with. And, I felt like it would be nice to have a large family
to be with as an adult as well. Maybe I jinxed myself by feeling this way,
because my family is estranged! Oh, well. My parents didn't put me in
daycare and other things to make friends, my first chance was in
kindergarten, so at least since I will be a SAHM, I plan to try to find lots
of activities and kids for my daughter to play with so she won't be so
scared about kindergarten- not that that caused that, but for a shy child
anyway, it wasn't an easy transition. I hope my daughter is an outgoing
child and picks up her father's easy temperament, and doesn't pick up my
shyness. Life will be easier for her! It's hard to be shy.

Vicky Bilaniuk wrote in message ...
Sophie wrote:
I wouldn't mind if
they did since then our kids would have cousins closer in age, as all
my other sibs are done while I'm just starting (at age 35).


My sister is 9 yrs older then me but only got married 2 yrs before me then I
started having kids first. It's worked out great - her oldest is 3 weeks
younger than my 3rd and her 2nd will be 6 months older than my 4th. If she
had gotten married younger and had kids younger the cousins wouldn't really
care about seeing each other.

Most of my siblings had children later, but I'm also near the end of
the line so they all have kids a bit older by now as I waited awhile
to start. Their cousins on the father's side will also be a few years
ago at least.

But while I'd like them to have cousins close in age, I know it's not
a huge deal. The cousins I am closest to as an adult are all much
older than me, and the one I was close to when I was younger is
actually my cousin's daughter. We live far from all our relatives
anyway. Two of my siblings who live near each other have 2 kids each
- 2 boys within a few months of eachother and 2 girls the same, and
the 4 just LOVE each other to death, so I do get a little envious of
that.

Sophie wrote:

I was just curious as to who here is finished having children?

We are finished. We went through IVF and FET to get these ones. I'm
very happy with these three. :-)

--
Brigitte aa #2145
http://www.babiesonline.com/babies/j/joshuaandkaterina/

"Readers are plentiful; thinkers are rare."
~ Harriet Martineau