Date for c-section and 36 week update

Hello all...

Well, yesterday, I had my 36 week appointment at the hospital. I had
to wait over 1.5 hours for them to see due to the incompetence of one
of the receptionists, and another had to page a doctor to see me.
But, anyway...

My appointment went fine. My BP was normal. My urine was clear. The
baby is heads down and not engaged. The baby's heartbeat was good.

We also set the date for my c-section. I requested that the date be
in the 39th week because the 38th week is the week between Xmas and
New Year's. The doctor gave me a choice of 3 dates -- 2 in week 38,
and 1 in Week 39. I took the Week 39 date.

I have decided that I don't want people to know the date of the
c-section. My MIL and FIL will be told because they will be watching
DD during the birth. My mother (who lives in another country) will be
told as well. However, I don't want anyone else to know. If I was
having a vaginal birth, no one would know about the birth until after
it happened. Just because I have a date, I don't see the need to
share. I also don't want people coming up to the hospital while I am
trying to get ready for a major operation and the birth of my second
child.

My DH thinks I am being silly. He said that he didn't see what the
big deal was, and he didn't really want any part of it. I told him to
blame it on me if he was uncomfortable about not telling people after
they asked.

Is it unreasonable that I don't want people to know about the birth
until after it happens??

--
Daye
Momma to Jayan
"Boy" EDD 11 Jan 2004
See Jayan: http://jayan.topcities.com/

: Is it unreasonable that I don't want people to know about the birth
: until after it happens??

Congratulations! IMHO, no, it's not unreasonable at all. It's a great way
to make your delivery a bit more smooth.

But do tell us! LOL!

~Carol Ann

Is it unreasonable that I don't want people to know about the birth
until after it happens??

--
Daye


If family and friends would come to the hospital, don't tell. I personally
have never had that happen. Here c-sections are scheduled for so early in
the morning I can't imagine anyone wanting to get up and come with us. They
really couldn't be in the prep room or the OR anyway.

I think it's kind of weird honestly, you've already told people the gender,
right? I don't see why they can't already know when you'll be having the
baby. But if it's what you want to do, go ahead.

"Daye" wrote
Is it unreasonable that I don't want people to know about the birth
until after it happens??

No, absolutely not!! I plan to do this as well- NO WAY am I telling until
after it's over.

If my husband doesn't comply I would probably be mad enough to leave him. I
am that firm about it. I think he will comply with no problem because he
sees the aggravation that my mom puts me through.

But, if he doesn't comply, I am going to be VERY demanding to the hospital
that NO ONE gets in. I will have it in writing and make sure all the staff
know.

"Sophie" wrote
If family and friends would come to the hospital, don't tell. I
personally
have never had that happen.

All I can do is groan at the thought. I told my mom not to come to the
ultrasound but she did anyway. I did finally agree that she could afer
telling her "Well I don't want you to. If you are going to cry and get
hysterical fine it is at such and such time. But I don't want you to." And
she came. I would be ticked if someone told me they didn't want me there and
would never have come. Not only that she was so afraid we would get there
before her, she came over an hour early.

Also, when I had surgery, I told her not to come and I never went back and
said it was ok at all. I insisted she not come...she came. I also told her
in front of the doctors NOT to enter the recovery room afterwards, I wanted
my husband ONLY. I also told her not to come back before the surgery when
they were prepping me, and she did. I actually argued with her in the prep
area, in front of the nurses, telling her to stay out. She said "No, I want
to be here I am not leaving." I was furious. I am going to make sure it
doesn't happen with the birth (the doctors didn't do too good of a job on
that one).

I am not saying everyone's guests are this inconsiderate and demanding, but
people can be very darn pushy in situations where they think they can get
their way. (I personally caouldn't believe that my mom came in, after I told
her i front of doctors and everyone, that I did not want her to. She has no
shame! She angrily told me later I embarassed her. I responded, "I TOLD you
for weeks beforehand I didn't want you there, and I asked you the day before
again not to come, I can't believe you embarassed yourself." I don't even
know that my mom rally wants to be there for these things herself, all she
ever says is she is embarassed to to tell her friends she is not wanted
there and wants to be able to tell them she attended.

"Jill" wrote in message
.com...

"Sophie" wrote
If family and friends would come to the hospital, don't tell. I
personally
have never had that happen.

All I can do is groan at the thought. I told my mom not to come to the
ultrasound but she did anyway. I did finally agree that she could afer
telling her "Well I don't want you to. If you are going to cry and get
hysterical fine it is at such and such time. But I don't want you to." And
she came. I would be ticked if someone told me they didn't want me there
and
would never have come. Not only that she was so afraid we would get there
before her, she came over an hour early.

Now why tell her when the appointment was if you *really* didn't want her
there? You're an adult, you vna have who you want there, and not have who
you don't want. That was silly.


Also, when I had surgery, I told her not to come and I never went back and
said it was ok at all. I insisted she not come...she came. I also told her
in front of the doctors NOT to enter the recovery room afterwards, I
wanted
my husband ONLY. I also told her not to come back before the surgery when
they were prepping me, and she did. I actually argued with her in the prep
area, in front of the nurses, telling her to stay out. She said "No, I
want
to be here I am not leaving." I was furious. I am going to make sure it
doesn't happen with the birth (the doctors didn't do too good of a job on
that one).

Then you tell the staff to call security and get her out, if you *really*
want her out.

I am not saying everyone's guests are this inconsiderate and demanding,
but
people can be very darn pushy in situations where they think they can get
their way. (I personally caouldn't believe that my mom came in, after I
told
her i front of doctors and everyone, that I did not want her to. She has
no
shame! She angrily told me later I embarassed her. I responded, "I TOLD
you
for weeks beforehand I didn't want you there, and I asked you the day
before
again not to come, I can't believe you embarassed yourself." I don't even
know that my mom rally wants to be there for these things herself, all she
ever says is she is embarassed to to tell her friends she is not wanted
there and wants to be able to tell them she attended.

Well no offense but you're an adult. Don't tell her about your
appointments, or tell her when and where, if you *really* don't want her
there.

JMO.

On Fri, 19 Dec 2003 08:27:21 +1100, Daye wrote:

Is it unreasonable that I don't want people to know about the birth
until after it happens??

I don't think so. It's your body, your baby, and your business. Even
if you're not in labor for 20+ hours, your body is still going to be
stressed from the birth and I think you're perfectly entitled to wait
until afterward to to tell people later. If they're not involved,
then they don't really have to know.



----== Posted via Newsfeed.Com - Unlimited-Uncensored-Secure Usenet News==----
http://www.newsfeed.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! 100,000 Newsgroups
---= 19 East/West-Coast Specialized Servers - Total Privacy via Encryption =---

On Fri, 19 Dec 2003 08:27:21 +1100, Daye wrote:
Is it unreasonable that I don't want people to know about the birth
until after it happens??

--
Daye

Congrats on a good appointment and getting your date set Daye. I think
not telling is fine . Those who need to know (you, DH, those caring
for your DD, etc) are fine but everyone else can wait for "The Phone
call" .

Di

I don't think it is unreasonable at all! After all you are telling your
closest family. What does change for people anyway to know the date after
you had the c-section? It's not that you are not telling the doctor who is
performing it! You also need time to rest and recover after the surgery and
you want just the closest people around you.
Good for you Daye.
Happy holidays if I don't hear from you before then and I am looking forward
to hear your birth story next year.
Love
--
Nicky

EDD March 26, '04. It's a girl!

"Jill" wrote in message
.com...

"Daye" wrote
Is it unreasonable that I don't want people to know about the birth
until after it happens??

No, absolutely not!! I plan to do this as well- NO WAY am I telling until
after it's over.


Based on your previous reply to this thread I don't like your chances. I
can imagine your mum ringing you up several times a day when you are full
term just to see that you're still in one piece. If she does't get a reply
she'll probably be tripping on up to the hospital.

Have you got Caller ID? You might need to put it to some use.