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#21
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Do you have at least 2 children??
I have three kids, 2 years 10 months between #1 and #2, and 4 years
between #2 and #3. My personal experience - a lot hinges on the temperment and personality of the individual kids AND the family itself. In retrospect, my first baby was about average. #2 was an extremely difficult baby. #3 was exceptionally mellow. So, what happened at our house was that when we had #2, he just about killed us. He was one of those legendary parent killing babies that never sleeps, that screams all the time etc. Turned out much later we found out he has a sensory integration issue on the autism scale, so everything bothers him and he can't ignore things in the environment like funny smells, rough clothing, noises, textures, temperatures, you name it. So his entire infancy, he just wailed and screamed night and day and we were totally strung out and couldn't figure out what we were doing wrong. Going from one kid to two was very difficult as a consequence. On the other hand, given that #3 was so "easy", going from 2 to 3 was no biggie at all. Honestly, if #2 had been our first baby and we not had a previous kid to compare to, I doubt we would have had more than one kid. #1 was interested in #2 but disappointed baby couldn't play immediately. I was the one who had the problem, since I felt stressed out all the time, and so much of my time and attention had to be on the screamer. I felt really bad since because #2 was so fussy and easily upset, we were held hostage in a way to his needs (i.e. I'd promise to take the 3 year old to the park and then would reneg because baby brother was inconsolably howling). When we had #3, both older boys were so excited. They were very interested in her, and since she was so easy going, they did interact with her a lot and she tolerated a lot of mauling (i.e. smoochy kisses, squishes, being buried in toys etc.). Now, years later, they are all fast friends and spend a lot of time playing together (i.e. The older two are partners in crime for video games, and they pool their cash for a lot of purchases, the middle one and the youngest play together still). At the moment, they are 17, 14 and 10. The 14 year old and the 10 year old fight a lot at the moment, but most of that is due to the phases they are in. 14 year old is crabby boy adolescent (i.e. maximally irritating know it all), 10 year old is in the drama queen phase of pre-adolescence. So he's always trying to tell her what to do, and she's always reacting like he's cutting off her leg with a chainsaw (screaming, door slamming etc). M |
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