Advice needed - birthday party and 25% of invited guests have RSVP'd - what should I do about the rest

In article ,
(Catherine Woodgold) wrote:

Rosalie B. ) writes:
Or (probably rude, but unmistakable), "If I don't hear from you by
9/25, we will assume your ds is not coming and will not have a place
for him."

... only if you're sure you don't have the kind of friend
who will arrive at the last minute saying "Oh, that's OK
if there's no balloon and stuff for him, he can just
watch the other kids, he'll have fun anyway"
--
Cathy

LOL ain't that the truth

Hey, I always call when I'm aware of an invitation, and yes, I do make
it a priority, but - on the other hand, as mom of three, I've been in
the party giving shoes and it doesn't bother me to have to call other
parents to check if a kid is coming, because I know that other working
parents have lives as nutso as mine and many whose lives are even
crazier.

I don't get all huffy and assume they are just rude schlubs, since I
appreciate that the parents or guardians may or may not even have SEEN
the invite depending on how scattered their kids are, or hubby said
he'd do it and forgot, or there is illness in the family or other
distraction etc. etc. etc. Also, I know that a lot of the kids our
children know come from all kinds of family arrangements where has
been divorce, separation, remarriage, living with relatives or grandma
and heaven knows what else, and that adds to the challenge. When a kid
is shuttling back and forth between two homes, or has a single parent
who struggling to raise 4 kids alone and working two jobs, its easy
for RSVPs to fall into the cracks. I wouldn't penalise the kids either
for what could be the failure of the adults.

Ya call all the ones you haven't heard of a couple of days before the
event, and its no biggie.

Mary G.

Mary Gordon wrote:
Hey, I always call when I'm aware of an invitation, and yes, I do make
it a priority, but - on the other hand, as mom of three, I've been in
the party giving shoes and it doesn't bother me to have to call other
parents to check if a kid is coming, because I know that other working
parents have lives as nutso as mine and many whose lives are even
crazier.

It would bother me. I would be rather embarassed to phone because
chances are that the parent DID see the invitation and for all the
reasons you go on to describe, might feel quite embarassed that I have
had to call them. *I* would be embarassed if someone phoned me.

I don't get all huffy and assume they are just rude schlubs, since I
appreciate that the parents or guardians may or may not even have SEEN
the invite depending on how scattered their kids are, or hubby said
he'd do it and forgot,
snip lots of situations....

I think I'd jusy skip the paper invitations and phone the child's
parents/carer directly.

Mary Ann