Losing weight during first trimester....

On Mon, 17 Nov 2003 19:46:05 GMT, "Jill" wrote:

Truthfully, it's not "a friend" who told me her
doctor said not to gain more than 20--- it's my mom!

So that advice is actually about 20-25 years old then?


/Erika

The first ten years of your life you try to be just like your parents.
Then for then years you try to be as little as your parents as possible.
Then you gradually change in to them.

On Mon, 17 Nov 2003, Erika wrote:

On Mon, 17 Nov 2003 19:46:05 GMT, "Jill" wrote:

Truthfully, it's not "a friend" who told me her
doctor said not to gain more than 20--- it's my mom!

So that advice is actually about 20-25 years old then?

Actually, at brunch with one of my dad's cousins, she told me her doc
INSISTED militantly to not gain more than 15 lbs during her pregnancy with
her oldest -- and that was about 35 years ago. Of course, they weren't
advised to stop smoking or drinking back then, so it may have been easier.
:^(

In article ,
Jill wrote:

That's why I get so mad at the way my family is being over my pregnancy...I
heard someone making snarky remarks like "Oooh, she is going to gai so much
weight!" How do they know, its like they want me to! But the most affecting
is my mother......she talks about how big my boobs are, and gives me diet
tips and tells me to exercise so I won't gain as much and tells me her
doctor says not to gain more than 20, etc. She tells me she gained 30 with
me because she let herself go, but gained less than 20 with my brother and
that was good. Every time I talk to her she ask me what I weigh and I refuse
to tell her, and she tells me I need to start watching it!

Yeah, that advice is like a generation old. I think The generation before
that was told to gain freely so the pendulum swung hard the other way. I
think today's advice is pretty reasonable.

Just keep telling everyone "my doctor says we're doing great!" in response to
any impertinent questions :*)

-LIz

"Jill" wrote in message
om...

"Sophie" wrote
I'm not happy to have the extra 10 lbs
already.


I am only worried about gaining too much, and I don't even have a clear
idea
of what too much is, because 30-40 pounds everyone keeps telling me is a
perfectly ok number. Since I was 100 and then gained about 40 lbs after
starting an office job, I am afraid of gaining another 40!



It's horrible. Gaining the weight is the only thing bothering me about
having another one. Each time it got harder for me to lose the weight too -
might be cos of age too. My motivation to getting it off after is not
wanting to look like a mother of 4 - lol.

On Mon, 17 Nov 2003 14:23:49 -0600, T Flynn wrote:

On Mon, 17 Nov 2003, Erika wrote:

On Mon, 17 Nov 2003 19:46:05 GMT, "Jill" wrote:

Truthfully, it's not "a friend" who told me her
doctor said not to gain more than 20--- it's my mom!

So that advice is actually about 20-25 years old then?

Actually, at brunch with one of my dad's cousins, she told me her doc
INSISTED militantly to not gain more than 15 lbs during her pregnancy with
her oldest -- and that was about 35 years ago. Of course, they weren't
advised to stop smoking or drinking back then, so it may have been easier.
:^(

Which is my point exactly. Today they know a lot more about what is
HEALTHY (not just pleasing for husbands and society.)

My midwife said that it varies between gaining only 5 pound (if you
already are overweight) to gaining 40 pounds without it being
unhealthy. It is what happens after breastfeeding that matters.
Women need fat depos on their bums and thighs for breastfeeding and
that is a fact.



/Erika

The first ten years of your life you try to be just like your parents.
Then for then years you try to be as little as your parents as possible.
Then you gradually change in to them.

wrote:

Actually, at brunch with one of my dad's cousins, she told me her doc
INSISTED militantly to not gain more than 15 lbs during her pregnancy with
her oldest -- and that was about 35 years ago. Of course, they weren't
advised to stop smoking or drinking back then, so it may have been easier.

Sounds like my mom's obstetrician. He actually had her on amphetamines for two
of her pregnancies, so she wouldn't gain "too much" weight. Most of her
pregnancies were during the fifties, when you weren't supposed to gain a whole
lot more than the baby was supposed to weigh.

--Helen

"Fer" wrote My mom was also told to
only gain 20 MAX when she had us kids and her
doc told the overweight moms to not gain an OUNCE!

Are you serious?? Not an ounce? That's impossible. I tend to take things
said like that as very personal, even when I can see sort of where it comes
from. My mom tends to say stuff like that all the time and her excuse is
always that she's trying to help, she is trying to prevent me from feeling
as bad as she did when she gained weight etc..that's NO excuse...if you
don't want someone to feel bad because someone said the things to them that
made YOU feel bad, YOU don;t say them.

Anyway I am more worried just about gaining a lot of weight....and it's not
even pounds, as in pounds of muscle weight when you work out etc....I just
don't want to get huge UNLESS it's all baby

"Erika" wrote
So that advice is actually about 20-25 years old then?

Lol! Yes, guess so. I can't believe doctors really used to advise women
that.

Sophie wrote:

It's horrible. Gaining the weight is the only thing bothering me about
having another one.

My doctor's office last time was really positive about my (quite large)
weight gain with my first... now that we've moved, I'm worried about
getting stuck with one of those "guilt trip" practitioners.

Mary S.
mom to the Sproutkin, 20 months
(and wishing for another)

Jill wrote:

I have a friend who's doctor advised her to not do any extreme measures but
to try to eat reasonably and try to not gain any more than 20 pounds with
her first. I also know a lot of people, thin and average to slightly
overweight, who gained what I consider enormous amounts of weight (to me),
like 50-65 pounds. The only reason I worry about this is if I gain that much
weight I will feel HORRIBLE- I can already tell I felt so much worse after
gaining 30-40 pounds anyway.

I lost about 10 pounds during my first trimester due to morning
sickness. I went on to gain 60 by the end. I was below my prepregnancy
weight a few months afterwards (I was exclusively breastfeeding). I
think it's really individual. Isn't the "no more than 20 pounds" thing
outdated at this point? IIRC, it's healthier for the baby if you gain
too much than to gain too little.

The women I know who have had the weight all fall off immediately (to
the point of having trouble eating enough to keep it on) are the ones
whose babies don't tolerate dairy through breastmilk, so they went
dairy-free while nursing. If you start worrying about what the scales
say, you can always tell yourself that you'll go on a
healthy-but-dairy-free diet after giving birth. Honestly, though, I
wouldn't worry about it. Eat wholesome food when you're hungry, gain
what you gain, and don't feel bad. You can *always* ask your midwife or
OB not to tell you what the scales say, if it's going to make you feel bad.

Okay, I just read your update about getting weight guilt from your mom.
Ack! Try not to let it get to you (I know that's practically
impossible). Whenever she says *anything* to you about it, I'd just get
a puzzled look and say, "Really? My doctor says I'm not gaining enough."
You can say this even if you are on track for a 60+ gain like I was,
it doesn't matter. Just repeat that sentence over and over and over,
until she gives up.

Mary S.
mom to the Sproutkin, 20 months
(and wishing for another)