Help! Toddler left in car question

I was recently in Tucson with a friend of mine and we went to check on a
rental property she owns. Her 2 year old was in the car seat, napping, and
my friend left her there when we went to check the house. The windows were
all down (this thanks to me -- my friend thought you could leave the windows
up on a 70 degree day in Tucson! This is the kind of thing that worries me
about my friend.). We were in the house about 15-20 minutes. She never
went to check on the toddler and we could not see the car from the house
unless we were in the front room. We went all over the house and the back
yard. My husband went to check on the toddler during this time. My friend
did not know he did it. I felt VERY uncomfortable about the fact that my
friend left her kid in the car unattended and I mentioned it to her. She
dismissed my concerns, saying that it was a safe neighborhood and one she
was familiar with. She also said that she didn't like to wake up her
daughter from her nap because she was so tired. I do not have children. I
know that I would NEVER leave my baby (if I had one) alone in a car, but
maybe I am just paranoid -- maybe, since I don't have kids, I just don't
understand. What should I do? Should I mention it again, more forcefully
this time? Am I just being paranoid? I would like to hear from some
parents on this. As for the neighborhood -- it's ok. It's not great and
not terrible -- just ok. Lord, I can tell you all that I am concerned about
my friendship with this woman right now because I feel as if I should
mention this again way more forcibly, but I would like some advice first.
Thanks.

--
nimue

"If I had created reality television I would have had a much greater
influence, but then I would have had to KILL MYSELF."
Joss Whedon

"There are two types of women -- those who like chocolate and complete
bitches."
Dawn French

"nimue" wrote in message
...
daughter from her nap because she was so tired. I do not have children.
I
know that I would NEVER leave my baby (if I had one) alone in a car, but
maybe I am just paranoid -- maybe, since I don't have kids, I just don't
understand. What should I do? Should I mention it again, more forcefully
this time? Am I just being paranoid? I would like to hear from some
parents on this. As for the neighborhood -- it's ok. It's not great and
not terrible -- just ok. Lord, I can tell you all that I am concerned
about
my friendship with this woman right now because I feel as if I should
mention this again way more forcibly, but I would like some advice first.
Thanks.

I have children and I do not leave my kids in the car for more than a minute
out of my sight. There's a law against that here, thank goodness, and it
states exactly that. We can't leave our kids in the car alone out of our
sight for more than a minute, so I only do it long enough to walk literally
a few feet from the driveway to the door of the dcp and step in to sign one
child in or out. It only take a few seconds, but I lock the vehicle door
and I put the emergency brake on. I've had GP's on both sides and friends
suggest I leave on or both kids in the car on different occasions, but
that's not me. I have a fear that something terrible might happen and then
I couldn't forgive myself for not following my heart.

Its takes one minute for someone to take your child. (yup less then that
even)
It takes 9 months to create a brother or sister. (and does not replace the
child stolen)
It takes many many many years, (even decades) getting over the fact you have
no idea where your child is, Or what happened to your child, or who ever
took your child.

Never ever do I leave a kid in a car. It would never happen to me. I have
heard to many cases of it happening. In fact was one here recently where
baby was dumped and it was lucky a passer by found it otherwise it would
have died.

Its againest the law in this state im living in, and also to you just dont
know who is really watching or following you.
I would suggest that she should be more careful. Maybe find out how many
cases have happened in the last year ?

Or you could be more forceful next time and if she refuses, you could then
shock her, (by being mean) and get another friend of yours to take baby
whilst she is inside looking at the houses. When she comes out, I bet you
one dollar she will panic and lose it !. (Unless of couse she doesn't really
care about the baby and is only using in a tug of war between her and her
ex)

BB

I know off topic but look at "I know my name is steven" or "the beaumont
children" both unlucky and in the wrong spot at the wrong time.


"nimue" wrote in message
...
I was recently in Tucson with a friend of mine and we went to check on a
rental property she owns. Her 2 year old was in the car seat, napping,
and
my friend left her there when we went to check the house. The windows
were
all down (this thanks to me -- my friend thought you could leave the
windows
up on a 70 degree day in Tucson! This is the kind of thing that worries
me
about my friend.). We were in the house about 15-20 minutes. She never
went to check on the toddler and we could not see the car from the house
unless we were in the front room. We went all over the house and the back
yard. My husband went to check on the toddler during this time. My
friend
did not know he did it. I felt VERY uncomfortable about the fact that my
friend left her kid in the car unattended and I mentioned it to her. She
dismissed my concerns, saying that it was a safe neighborhood and one she
was familiar with. She also said that she didn't like to wake up her
daughter from her nap because she was so tired. I do not have children.
I
know that I would NEVER leave my baby (if I had one) alone in a car, but
maybe I am just paranoid -- maybe, since I don't have kids, I just don't
understand. What should I do? Should I mention it again, more forcefully
this time? Am I just being paranoid? I would like to hear from some
parents on this. As for the neighborhood -- it's ok. It's not great and
not terrible -- just ok. Lord, I can tell you all that I am concerned
about
my friendship with this woman right now because I feel as if I should
mention this again way more forcibly, but I would like some advice first.
Thanks.

--
nimue

"If I had created reality television I would have had a much greater
influence, but then I would have had to KILL MYSELF."
Joss Whedon

"There are two types of women -- those who like chocolate and complete
bitches."
Dawn French

Billy bob wrote:
Its takes one minute for someone to take your child. (yup less then
that even)
It takes 9 months to create a brother or sister. (and does not
replace the child stolen)
It takes many many many years, (even decades) getting over the fact
you have no idea where your child is, Or what happened to your child,
or who ever took your child.

Never ever do I leave a kid in a car. It would never happen to me. I
have heard to many cases of it happening. In fact was one here
recently where baby was dumped and it was lucky a passer by found it
otherwise it would have died.

Its againest the law in this state im living in,

What state is that? This happened in Arizona and I live in New York.

and also to you just
dont know who is really watching or following you.
I would suggest that she should be more careful. Maybe find out how
many cases have happened in the last year ?

Or you could be more forceful next time and if she refuses, you could
then shock her, (by being mean) and get another friend of yours to
take baby whilst she is inside looking at the houses.

No, no, I could never do that.

When she comes
out, I bet you one dollar she will panic and lose it !. (Unless of
couse she doesn't really care about the baby and is only using in a
tug of war between her and her ex)

Uh, creepy -- I didn't mention that she is divorced -- how did you know? I
think she does love her baby -- I just think she is UNBELIEVABLY naive --
she just assumes everything will be okay and constantly has these little
messes in her life that come from not making sure things are as they should
be.

BB

I know off topic but look at "I know my name is steven" or "the
beaumont children" both unlucky and in the wrong spot at the wrong
time.


"nimue" wrote in message
...
I was recently in Tucson with a friend of mine and we went to check
on a rental property she owns. Her 2 year old was in the car seat,
napping, and my friend left her there when we went to check the
house. The windows were all down (this thanks to me -- my friend
thought you could leave the windows up on a 70 degree day in Tucson!
This is the kind of thing that worries me about my friend.). We
were in the house about 15-20 minutes. She never went to check on
the toddler and we could not see the car from the house unless we
were in the front room. We went all over the house and the back
yard. My husband went to check on the toddler during this time. My
friend did not know he did it. I felt VERY uncomfortable about the
fact that my friend left her kid in the car unattended and I
mentioned it to her. She dismissed my concerns, saying that it was a
safe neighborhood and one she was familiar with. She also said that
she didn't like to wake up her daughter from her nap because she was
so tired. I do not have children. I know that I would NEVER leave
my baby (if I had one) alone in a car, but maybe I am just paranoid
-- maybe, since I don't have kids, I just don't understand. What
should I do? Should I mention it again, more forcefully this time?
Am I just being paranoid? I would like to hear from some parents on
this. As for the neighborhood -- it's ok. It's not great and not
terrible -- just ok. Lord, I can tell you all that I am concerned
about my friendship with this woman right now because I feel as if I
should mention this again way more forcibly, but I would like some
advice first. Thanks.

--
nimue

"If I had created reality television I would have had a much greater
influence, but then I would have had to KILL MYSELF."
Joss Whedon

"There are two types of women -- those who like chocolate and
complete bitches."
Dawn French

--
nimue

"If I had created reality television I would have had a much greater
influence, but then I would have had to KILL MYSELF." Joss Whedon

"There are two types of women -- those who like chocolate and complete
bitches." Dawn French

"Billy bob" billybob@bobshome wrote in message
u...
Its takes one minute for someone to take your child. (yup less then that
even)

I think there are a lot of situations reported where the child was
unintentionally taken by a car thief. You know, the child was in the back
seat and the thief didn't know it.

"toypup" wrote in message
om...

"Billy bob" billybob@bobshome wrote in message
u...
Its takes one minute for someone to take your child. (yup less then that
even)

I think there are a lot of situations reported where the child was
unintentionally taken by a car thief. You know, the child was in the back
seat and the thief didn't know it.

Define "a lot". And what percentage are car jackings (where a parent
was in the car or standing by the car) versus parents wandering away.
From what I've heard on the news, I'd guess one or two a year in the
entire US, and I'd say most of those are car jackings. Note, I'm not
saying you should leave children in cars, I'm just tired of folks fear
mongering about imagined dangers, instead of the obvious ones, like
a child overheating in a parked car.

"Cathy Kearns" wrote in message
om...

"toypup" wrote in message
om...

"Billy bob" billybob@bobshome wrote in message
u...
Its takes one minute for someone to take your child. (yup less then
that
even)

I think there are a lot of situations reported where the child was
unintentionally taken by a car thief. You know, the child was in the
back
seat and the thief didn't know it.

Define "a lot". And what percentage are car jackings (where a parent
was in the car or standing by the car) versus parents wandering away.
From what I've heard on the news, I'd guess one or two a year in the
entire US, and I'd say most of those are car jackings. Note, I'm not
saying you should leave children in cars, I'm just tired of folks fear
mongering about imagined dangers, instead of the obvious ones, like
a child overheating in a parked car.



The car theft thing is on my mind as part of why I do not leave the kids in
the car, as if I needed too many reasons. For me, it is not so much the
likelihood, which is pathetically small. But *what if?* As I said to my DH,
who just paled upon thinking about it, the consequences are so horrifyingly
small that a vanishingly small chance is just not small enough.

I am with you on making things seem what they are not. I do not see the
value in it. But even if temperature is not a problem, I still would not
leave my kids.

Stephanie Stowe wrote:
"Cathy Kearns" wrote in message
om...

"toypup" wrote in message
om...

"Billy bob" billybob@bobshome wrote in message
u...
Its takes one minute for someone to take your child. (yup less then
that
even)

I think there are a lot of situations reported where the child was
unintentionally taken by a car thief. You know, the child was in
the back
seat and the thief didn't know it.

Define "a lot". And what percentage are car jackings (where a parent
was in the car or standing by the car) versus parents wandering away.
From what I've heard on the news, I'd guess one or two a year in the
entire US, and I'd say most of those are car jackings. Note, I'm not
saying you should leave children in cars, I'm just tired of folks
fear mongering about imagined dangers, instead of the obvious ones,
like
a child overheating in a parked car.



The car theft thing is on my mind as part of why I do not leave the
kids in the car, as if I needed too many reasons. For me, it is not
so much the likelihood, which is pathetically small. But *what if?*
As I said to my DH, who just paled upon thinking about it, the
consequences are so horrifyingly small that a vanishingly small
chance is just not small enough.

THAT is good parenting. In fact, THAT is a good way to think in general.
This is why my friend gets into trouble so often. She just doesn't think of
the worst possible consequences. She just thinks the world is a much safer
place than I do.

I am with you on making things seem what they are not. I do not see
the value in it. But even if temperature is not a problem, I still
would not leave my kids.

--
nimue

"If I had created reality television I would have had a much greater
influence, but then I would have had to KILL MYSELF." Joss Whedon

"There are two types of women -- those who like chocolate and complete
bitches." Dawn French

On Mon, 28 Feb 2005 16:17:16 -0500, "Stephanie Stowe"
scribbled:



The car theft thing is on my mind as part of why I do not leave the kids in
the car, as if I needed too many reasons. For me, it is not so much the
likelihood, which is pathetically small. But *what if?* As I said to my DH,
who just paled upon thinking about it, the consequences are so horrifyingly
small that a vanishingly small chance is just not small enough.

This is my reasoning, as well. I won't debate the "what ifs" and
percentages of likelihoods with anyone here, but I don't leave mine in
the car for any reason other than I'd stated for opening the door of
our house and dropping my purse or groceries inside.
It's just not a risk (no matter how minute) I wish to take.

If my dd2 is asleep, I just don't stop for bread or a newspaper or
whatever. It's not important enough to me, to leave her in the car.
I always pay at the pump if the kids are with me, too.

Nan

"Stephanie Stowe" wrote in message
...

"Cathy Kearns" wrote in message
om...

"toypup" wrote in message
om...

"Billy bob" billybob@bobshome wrote in message
u...
Its takes one minute for someone to take your child. (yup less then
that
even)

I think there are a lot of situations reported where the child was
unintentionally taken by a car thief. You know, the child was in the
back
seat and the thief didn't know it.

Define "a lot". And what percentage are car jackings (where a parent
was in the car or standing by the car) versus parents wandering away.
From what I've heard on the news, I'd guess one or two a year in the
entire US, and I'd say most of those are car jackings. Note, I'm not
saying you should leave children in cars, I'm just tired of folks fear
mongering about imagined dangers, instead of the obvious ones, like
a child overheating in a parked car.



The car theft thing is on my mind as part of why I do not leave the kids
in
the car, as if I needed too many reasons. For me, it is not so much the
likelihood, which is pathetically small. But *what if?* As I said to my
DH,
who just paled upon thinking about it, the consequences are so
horrifyingly
small that a vanishingly small chance is just not small enough.

That's a good reason for not leaving your child. You acknowledge that it's
vanishingly small, but not small enough. I can certainly see that.

I am with you on making things seem what they are not. I do not see the
value in it. But even if temperature is not a problem, I still would not
leave my kids.

I'm just against the argument of not leaving your kids because "there are
a lot of situation reported where the child was unintentionally taken..."
It's too easy to disprove, there aren't "a lot", so it's not persuasive.