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#11
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4 year old wetting pants.
First, make sure that there is no physical problem by taking her to her pediatrician to check that she doesn't have a bladder infection or something like that. Second, *don't* punish her or reward her for her toileting behavior. Let her change herself, but don't react to it at all if you want to try to keep her in underwear. My vote, though would be to ask her if she wants to be back in diapers and to allow that if she wants to be a baby again for a little while. It will blow over after the stresses of the new baby are done. Meanwhile talk to her about all the things big kids can do that babies can't manage. And involve her in helping with the new baby. I am sure that your husbands being gone is probably a stressor too, so keep her in touch with him if you can. Does he have email access? He can write to her and you can read these emails to her. -- Dorothy There is no sound, no cry in all the world that can be heard unless someone listens .. The Outer Limits She has an appointment soon with her ped and I am going to get her checked out then, just to make sure. I have been having her help me with the baby. She helps me dress him bath him and chnage him. I have tried to keep her as involved with him as much as possible. As far as her dad is concerened she has been so angry about the whole situation. He has called twice this week the first time she answered the phone but she wouldn't aknowledge him and handed me the phone. When I asked her if she wanted to talk to him she just walked away. Then he called yesterday while she was napping, I let her know after she woke up and all she has to say was "I'm happy for you" Anytime I try to talk to her about him being out to sea she changes the subject, if I press her she just walks off. We tried to prepare her as far in advance as we could for this. We took her for a tour of the sub, let her see where daddy sleeps, eats and what not. I even got her a calendar so that we could count off the days till daddy gets back.. she seemed like it wasn't that big a deal. Till the day we dropped him off at the pier and she wouldn't say goodbye to him. She literally snubbed him, no hugs, kisses nothing.. I felt so bad for the both of them. Course once we drove off she bawled all the way home. I just don't know how to get her to open up about the whole thing .. so talking to him really doesn't help since I can't get her to talk to him |
#12
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4 year old wetting pants.
x-no-archive:yes
toto wrote: On Wed, 10 Mar 2004 21:02:18 GMT, "kylee" wrote: I have even caught her intentionally pulling down her pants and going on the floor just so she wouldn't get in trouble for getting her pants wet. So I know she knows when she has to go. Granted our only bathroom is upstairs but this is gettiing rediculous. First, make sure that there is no physical problem by taking her to her pediatrician to check that she doesn't have a bladder infection or something like that. Yes - I had cystitis right after I was married and I would have to go again even if I had just gone. It doesn't help to know that I need to go - because I always needed to go. (Like in those commercials). I couldn't even drive 45 minutes without stopping to go. This is different from frequent urination because you are pg. So I would want to be sure that it was something that she really has control over. Second, *don't* punish her or reward her for her toileting behavior. Let her change herself, but don't react to it at all if you want to try to keep her in underwear. My vote, though would be to ask her if she wants to be back in diapers and to allow that if she wants to be a baby again for a little while. It will blow over after the stresses of the new baby are done. Meanwhile talk to her about all the things big kids can do that babies can't manage. And involve her in helping with the new baby. I am sure that your husbands being gone is probably a stressor too, so keep her in touch with him if you can. Does he have email access? He can write to her and you can read these emails to her. grandma Rosalie |
#13
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4 year old wetting pants.
"kylee" wrote in message . ..
Till the day we dropped him off at the pier and she wouldn't say goodbye to him. She literally snubbed him, no hugs, kisses nothing.. I felt so bad for the both of them. Course once we drove off she bawled all the way home. I just don't know how to get her to open up about the whole thing .. so talking to him really doesn't help since I can't get her to talk to him I have found that books and stories (about other kids and dads who just happen to have the same things happen to them) help a ton with things like this. Find a book (or make up a story) about a little girl whose daddy goes away on a sub and tell her all the things that happen. If there are any particular things you think she may be worrying about, put those in the story too. If she gets into the story, let her fill in details or ask her questions (How do you think Kimberly felt when xyz happened?). This might give you great insight into what is going on. Good luck, Jan |
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