obnoxious kid alert---what to do?

x-no-archive: yes

hey, here's a stupid goddamn situation where i allowed myself to be
mousetrapped.

i was at a very small park that had only 1 water fountain with my 2
nephews. they wanted to have a drink, but there was an
insolent-looking kid, about 10 or 11, who was hogging the fountain way
too long.

my nephews were quite unhappy with the brat (they are only 6 and 4),
but though my real wish was to strangle him and leave his body in the
bushes, i was reluctant to say anything, b/c i was afraid that he
would reply defiantly and i couldn't raise the stakes. There are all
those inconvenient laws against murder on the books.

i silently waited him out, which really was much too long, and then my
nephews got their water belatedly.

but what DO you do if you ask or order a snotnosed kid to vacate the
fountain and he impudently refuses?

Did you try asking the "insolent-looking kid" if he/she would let your
smaller ones have a drink...
or did you just judge this kid on his/her appearnce ?

I've found that if you treat a child with respect he/she is often
responsive.

abdul rahim wrote in message
om...
x-no-archive: yes

hey, here's a stupid goddamn situation where i allowed myself to be
mousetrapped.

i was at a very small park that had only 1 water fountain with my 2
nephews. they wanted to have a drink, but there was an
insolent-looking kid, about 10 or 11, who was hogging the fountain way
too long.

my nephews were quite unhappy with the brat (they are only 6 and 4),
but though my real wish was to strangle him and leave his body in the
bushes, i was reluctant to say anything, b/c i was afraid that he
would reply defiantly and i couldn't raise the stakes. There are all
those inconvenient laws against murder on the books.

i silently waited him out, which really was much too long, and then my
nephews got their water belatedly.

but what DO you do if you ask or order a snotnosed kid to vacate the
fountain and he impudently refuses?

You're an adult, I assume? You could've said to him "Hey, other people are
thirsty too", or "Come on, move along, let someone else have a drink".
I'm not above saying "Didn't your mother teach you any manners?"

You didn't say that you asked him to vacate the fountain, you waited in
silence. So he won!


"abdul rahim" wrote in message
om...
x-no-archive: yes

hey, here's a stupid goddamn situation where i allowed myself to be
mousetrapped.

i was at a very small park that had only 1 water fountain with my 2
nephews. they wanted to have a drink, but there was an
insolent-looking kid, about 10 or 11, who was hogging the fountain way
too long.

my nephews were quite unhappy with the brat (they are only 6 and 4),
but though my real wish was to strangle him and leave his body in the
bushes, i was reluctant to say anything, b/c i was afraid that he
would reply defiantly and i couldn't raise the stakes. There are all
those inconvenient laws against murder on the books.

i silently waited him out, which really was much too long, and then my
nephews got their water belatedly.

but what DO you do if you ask or order a snotnosed kid to vacate the
fountain and he impudently refuses?

BTW, you might want to talk to someone about those violent thoughts of
yours.

In ,
abdul rahim wrote:

*but what DO you do if you ask or order a snotnosed kid to vacate the
*fountain and he impudently refuses?

Well, if I ask a child politely to finish up and let someone else have a
turn, and he refuses, I look for the responsible adult. If there is no
responsible adult, I would probably simply tell the child it was time to
let someone else have a turn, and go up to the water fountain myself. If
nothing else, I'd be able to fill my hand with water and let my kids sip
from my hand.

That being said, it doesn't sound like you made any attempt to move the
kid. You said you didn't say anything, but rather waited him out in
silence. In that case, I hardly think you have cause for such a complaint.
Next time, try saying "excuse me, my boys are thirsty, would you mind
letting them take a turn at the water fountain please?" It might work
wonders.

--
hillary israeli vmd http://www.hillary.net
"uber vaccae in quattuor partes divisum est."
not-so-newly minted veterinarian-at-large

On Wed, 14 Apr 2004 11:40:24 +0000 (UTC), (Hillary
Israeli) wrote:

That being said, it doesn't sound like you made any attempt to move the
kid. You said you didn't say anything, but rather waited him out in
silence. In that case, I hardly think you have cause for such a complaint.

Exactly. 10 to 11 year olds are not mind-readers and they may not be
paying attention to the fact that there are others waiting, but a
polite request shouldn't be out of order here.


--
Dorothy

There is no sound, no cry in all the world
that can be heard unless someone listens ..

The Outer Limits

"abdul rahim" wrote in message
om...

but what DO you do if you ask or order a snotnosed kid to vacate the
fountain and he impudently refuses?

If he was really snot-nosed, I think I would have skipped the water fountain
completely.
--
JennP.

mom to Matthew 10/11/00
EDD #2 10/24/04
remove "no........spam" to reply

In article ,
(abdul rahim) wrote:

x-no-archive: yes

hey, here's a stupid goddamn situation where i allowed myself to be
mousetrapped.

i was at a very small park that had only 1 water fountain with my 2
nephews. they wanted to have a drink, but there was an
insolent-looking kid, about 10 or 11, who was hogging the fountain way
too long.

my nephews were quite unhappy with the brat (they are only 6 and 4),
but though my real wish was to strangle him and leave his body in the
bushes, i was reluctant to say anything, b/c i was afraid that he
would reply defiantly and i couldn't raise the stakes. There are all
those inconvenient laws against murder on the books.

i silently waited him out, which really was much too long, and then my
nephews got their water belatedly.

but what DO you do if you ask or order a snotnosed kid to vacate the
fountain and he impudently refuses?

First, I would NOT start out by assuming he was insolent or "hogging the
fountain". I would start out by assuming he was a kid who wasn't paying
a lot of attention to the people around him. It's been known to happen
with kids this age!

Then, I would politely (and this is one key -- treat people the way you
want to BE treated) ask him if he was almost done, and point out that I
had some young children who were desperately thirsty. Chances are
excellent that you would have discovered that he was not being selfish,
merely unthinking, and he'd have moved.

Then, if he DID turn out to be an insolent snot nosed kid, I would think
about what sort of behavior I wanted to model for my nephews, and
continue to be polite and civil towards him. So it takes longer for
your nephews to get a drink: they will have learned that being polite
and civil to other people (treating people the way you want to be
treated -- that whole "do unto others" thing) is more important than
getting a drink of water two minutes sooner.

I doubt seriously that this boy was at the fountain for more than, say,
five minutes. If he was there for half an hour, the situation might be
different -- but you got your blood preassure WAY to high for what was,
after all, a relatively short wait, and given that you did NOTHING to
ask the boy to move sooner.

I hope when your nephew reach this age, you don't judge THEM by nothing
more than their looks and your assumptions about pre-teens.

meh
--
Children won't care how much you know until they know how much you care

"abdul rahim" wrote in message
om...
x-no-archive: yes

hey, here's a stupid goddamn situation where i allowed myself to be
mousetrapped.

Reminds me of Ann Landers: You can't be taken advantage of without your
permission.

i was at a very small park that had only 1 water fountain with my 2
nephews. they wanted to have a drink, but there was an
insolent-looking kid, about 10 or 11, who was hogging the fountain way
too long.

my nephews were quite unhappy with the brat (they are only 6 and 4),
but though my real wish was to strangle him and leave his body in the
bushes, i was reluctant to say anything, b/c i was afraid that he
would reply defiantly and i couldn't raise the stakes. There are all
those inconvenient laws against murder on the books.

i silently waited him out, which really was much too long, and then my
nephews got their water belatedly.

but what DO you do if you ask or order a snotnosed kid to vacate the
fountain and he impudently refuses?

Short of talking to the kids parents (who probably weren't around) or taking
physical action against the kid (which would not be good because it teaches
violence to your nephews plus could get you in jail), what can you do?
Nothing.

What you can do though is explain to your nephews how you felt and let them
say they felt. That way, they gain a valuable lesson in curtesy.

Jeff