Why does this bother me? (re - breastfeeding)

Come visit me.. people tell me that all the time. I can't freaking stand
it. That and the "is this your last one?" Like its anyone's business. I
need to find something creative to say to the next person that tells me I
have my hands full or the next person that says, "Gee, no boys?"

Denise



I got "I should hope so" when I said this was our last :0

Wendy wrote:

I am really surprised to hear how many mothers are saying they breastfed
their babies past the recommended 12 months. I think breastfeeding is
wonderful but I am curious to know why you would WANT to breastfeed that
long. I'm not criticizing their choice so no flames, please, but is
there a point where it gets weird? Isn't 3,4, or 5 a little old to be
nursing? How can you nurse a kindergartener? And if people nurse
children of that age why not go to 10 or 11? Where is the cutoff? Just
wondering.

Thanks for asking that, I've been wondering too but not sure how to ask
without seeming rude.

I have! Last summer my husband was picking out a rental tuxedo and
Sydney (7 months at the time) got fussy. I sat down in a chair, out of
the way, and began to nurse her. The store manager came over and asked
me if I would like to go in the back. I thought she was being nice and
said I was okay where I was. She then said sternly, "I would like you
to go in back." I asked, innocently, why? and she answered that she
had customers in the store (there was one other couple there shopping,
a young, hip-looking duo). I said that I wasn't doing anything wrong,
and she said "I didn't say you were doing anything wrong. I asked you
to go in the back." I said "no thank you," and continued to nurse, and
she left me alone.

If you're sitting there doing it, you're obviously comfortable doing it
there. How rude.

I was so angry I almost stormed out, but my picky
husband was in the middle of a fitting, and we were hot and tired and
so I let it go. I did write a letter to the company (after posting to
mkb about this and getting some great advice) but I never received an
answer or acknowledgement. GRR.

Now *that* would make me mad, to not even get a reply.

Other than that, I don't recall anything nasty. I've had a few other
store or restaurant people ask me if I wanted privacy, but nothing I
interpreted as rudeness, rather they seemed more concerned that *I*
was uncomfortable.

To answer some of the other questions in this thread - about cover-ups
- I usually don't use one as I think that I am pretty discreet,
despite having large breasts. I do own a sling and used it sometimes
when Sydney was little, especially when walking around - but if I'm
seated, I find it easier just to be free and clear of any blankets,
slings, etc.

And about extended nursing... I nursed Jake until he was 2 years, 9
months and would have kept going but it became very painful for me
during my pregnancy with Sydney. She is 16.5 months and is still
nursing a few times a day. I think Jamie and Chotii both had great
explanations of why nursing continues.

Corrie
Mom to Jake 12/30/99
Sydney 1/14/03
^i^ JM 6/9/97
^i^ 1/2002

"Sophie" wrote in message


I got "I should hope so" when I said this was our last :0


Agh! That would have made me mad. I'm looking forward to actually having
this one so I can once again deal with "Are they all yours?"

Denise

In ,
Sophie wrote:

*Have any of you who breastfeed in public ever had anyone say anything rude
*to you? Just curious.

Yeah, lots of times - but not about breastfeeding. Ha ha. But seriously,
folks - actually a relative of mine (by marriage) told me that it was
disgusting and that I wasn't allowed to do it near her. I ignored that and
did what needed to be done. Other than that, no.

--
hillary israeli vmd http://www.hillary.net
"uber vaccae in quattuor partes divisum est."
not-so-newly minted veterinarian-at-large

"Denise Anderson" wrote in message
...

"Sophie" wrote in message
...
That's how I feel now about soon having a "large" family.
I want someone to say "gee you sure have your hands full"
just so I can rip them a new one -
lol.


Come visit me.. people tell me that all the time. I can't freaking
stand it. That and the "is this your last one?" Like its anyone's
business. I need to find something creative to say to the next
person that tells me I have my hands full or the next person that
says, "Gee, no boys?"

I get that "hands full" comment with only having two. Sometimes the
"are you done?" one too. So, I wouldn't take it personally. I would
even bet just as many people say, "one of each!" to me, as "gee, no
boys?" to you, Denise. Some people just seem to feel the need to
make comments, even if they have nothing useful to say.
--
Cheryl S.
Mom to Julie, 3, and Jaden, 9 months

On Fri, 4 Jun 2004 09:43:10 +0000 (UTC), "melizabeth"
wrote:
I have a question for moms who NIP...and I am honestly asking this, so
please don't flame me, are you all using a blanket, or the sling while NIP?

I used a blanket during the winter when it wouldn't be too hot. I
never nursed in the sling.

Personally, I don't have a problem with NIP and anticipate that I will be
doing this when the time comes. I'm just curious. The only time when I
have done a double take is when a friend of mine BF her baby without
covering up in a crowded food court. I'm wondering how much discretion
plays a part in people's attitudes towards NIP.

At some point it's difficult to be discrete. It's too hot, or the baby
doesn't want cloth near his face, it could be anything.
Personally I think the idea of having to be so discrete should go out
the window...bottles and pacifiers don't have to be hidden.
Marie

IME, I tried to use a blanket for NIP....but once DD got a bit bigger, she
seemed to get really sweaty with her head covered up. So we would use a
blanket for the inital latch on...then i could adjust my shirt to where all
you could see would be Kelly's head laying against me and we would leave the
blankie draped over her body to cover the rest of us. There were a few times
that I used the lounge area of a ladies restroom, dressing rooms, airplanes,
wherever. When she was hungry I would feed her.

DH was the one who would get all excited about other people seeing the
babies feed. (He was usually the primary blankie holder for the latch on if
he was with us My thoughts were 1. it's not pornographic....and 2. if you
are a grown man or woman and have not seen a breast before then maybe you
need to grow up a bit. It's not like I whipped off my shirt and bra and was
naked in the mall or anything...sheesh....that was before we had kids. *lol*


DS did not take to the breast well and he ended up being FF. It's like he
couldn't settle down long enough to latch on, even with milk flying every
where.

FWIW, I never received negative comments about NIP or nursing in general.

Maria
Kelly 2/19/00
Kyle 7/9/01

For the record, I had no negative comments for my overall
"melizabeth" wrote in message
...
I have a question for moms who NIP...and I am honestly asking this, so
please don't flame me, are you all using a blanket, or the sling while
NIP?

Personally, I don't have a problem with NIP and anticipate that I will be
doing this when the time comes. I'm just curious. The only time when I
have done a double take is when a friend of mine BF her baby without
covering up in a crowded food court. I'm wondering how much discretion
plays a part in people's attitudes towards NIP.

I will probably cover up, but that is just me.

Please, don't flame me, I am just asking.
--
M~Elizabeth

To thine own self be true

On Fri, 4 Jun 2004 12:57:05 -0400, "Cheryl S."
wrote:
I get that "hands full" comment with only having two. Sometimes the
"are you done?" one too. So, I wouldn't take it personally. I would
even bet just as many people say, "one of each!" to me, as "gee, no
boys?" to you, Denise. Some people just seem to feel the need to
make comments, even if they have nothing useful to say.

I think it's weird for people to say your hands are full with only two
kids...I got that, too. Now that I have three, I was at the grocery
store and the cashier (an elderly lady) just acted in awe that, yes,
they were all mine LOL I do get asked if I'm done.
Now that I think about it, we all were in the store a few months ago
and this elderly couple asked if they were all ours, and made some
comment about "don't you know what causes that?" I almost said, "Yes,
F*CKING!!" but instead I politely smiled.
Marie

Marie wibbled

I think it's weird for people to say your hands are full with only
two kids...

Well literally speaking it's the obvious time to say it. One kid in
each hand (pulling in opposite directions, knowing kids). ;-)

Jac