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#21
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Sad story
Donna Metler wrote:
There are SO many people out there advocating for VBAC, non-interventionist childbirth, home birth, etc, that it would be easy to convince yourself that the doctors are wrong if they tell you that they expect complications. After all, having babies is easy, millions of women do it, right? And if that's what you want, it's easy to convince yourself of that. There's some of that, but I think that the medical folks have to take some of that blame as well for crying wolf all this time. When you claim all sorts of things that are demonstrably untrue, you're practically begging people not to believe you when what you're saying *is* true. I would dispute that there are SO many people out there advocating for low intervention birth. There are many here, but in real life, I find they're few and far between. There are far more people willing to tell me I'm crackers for wanting to avoid an epidural than there are people willing to tell women choosing high intervention births that they should rethink their plans. I suspect Angela may have the right of it--that something about her previous c-section experience and sequelae made her bound and determined not to have that experience again, even if it meant taking risks others would see as foolish. (Not that that's rational, but her experience may have been such that she was not capable of rational thought about this particular issue.) Also, when it comes to at least frank breeches, with an experienced caregiver, the additional risk of a vaginal delivery is *very* small. The problem now is that there are very few caregivers experienced in vaginal breech births, and there are many ways to do the wrong thing and make the situation far more risky. So, what was once only a mild additional risk has become a significant additional risk through loss of knowledge and experience. It also provides an opportunity for confusion, because there are several studies done that show little increased risk--but they were done before that knowledge became so much more scarce. I pity her-because now not only will she have to deal with the guilt and pain of a loss, but realize that there's a good chance that her choices caused it. And that's a pain I would hate to see anyone go through. Absolutely. Best wishes, Ericka |
#22
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Sad story
Zaz wrote:
Why doesn't it surprise you? Sooke is well-known to have people of a different character residing there. -- Brigitte aa #2145 http://ca.geocities.com/bironmonger/ Please excuse the quality. It is under construction and I am still learning. :-) "To repeat what others have said, requires education; to challenge it, requires brains." ~ Mary Pettibone Poole |
#23
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Sad story
Why would you be concerned Jean? Are there any poster here who have failed
to listen to EVERY midwife they spoke to and then hired one illegally to give birth at home to a breached baby? Oh of course... if there are regular posters here who have lost a child at birth, for sure ((((MEGA HUGS))). God bless you, I am sure you did everything you could in your power to prevent it because you love your baby more than life itself. and please don't be offended by my opinion of that woman because you cannot begin to imagine how much I do not consider you in any way to be like her. I dunno.. if I had lost Tommy at birth, I would be devasted and hearing about this woman and how she did nothing to prevent it would make me even more upset at her. "Iuil" wrote in message ... "Jenny D" wrote She killed her child; she's a murderer. I really hope that some of our regular posters aren't reading this. If you are, then (((((mega-hugs)))). Jean |
#24
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Sad story
"This is a terrible accusation, and the religious tidbit in now way
diminishes it: would murder for a god be less a murder?" I agree. Some religions don't allow blood tranfusion or organ transplants. I think it's wrong but if it's their religion, what can we do about it? I'm not saying a religious reason makes it right, I'm just saying it may help us to undertand her logic. (or lack there of) but certainly, I totally agree with you... it is not right no matter what the excuse. Perhaps I should have phrased that psrt better. "I realize you are an extreme person who stands by her views, but this was not a murder, it was an accident, which could also have happened in a hospital." I agree with you again. And if she would have gone to the hospital, I bet that baby would have lived. Yes, of course, it may still have died in hospital but at least she would have done all that she could for him/her. "That woman might have lacked some judgement, but the people around her did too, and she is not to be blamed." What do you mean by the people around her? The only person responsible for her birthing is herself. The mother has full responsibility. "I sincerely hope nothing ever happens to you or your loved ones following a decision you might have made thinking it was the right one." If I CHOSE not to buckle my child in the minivan and he died in a vehicle accident, I would be a stupid woman... I would be a murderer but if I fogot because I was holding 5 bags in one hand and a screaming nephew in another, then it would be a mistake... a horrible, regretable mistake. She did not make a mistake, she made a choice. How in the world could she think she was making the right decision. What era does she think we live it? It's the 21st centure and despite how "natural" you want to be, you cannot ignore the doctores and dozens of qualified midwives. She had to have been mentally retarted. |
#25
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Sad story
"Jenny D" wrote Why would you be concerned Jean? Are there any poster here who have failed to listen to EVERY midwife they spoke to and then hired one illegally to give birth at home to a breached baby? You don't know the whole story. You are going on a post that came from someone who doesn't know the whole story. This is called hearsay and is disallowed in courts of law for very good reason - the story gets distorted. The fact that the midwife was not registered does not mean that she was unqualified and/or unexperienced. Oh of course... if there are regular posters here who have lost a child at birth, for sure ((((MEGA HUGS))). That is why. One of whom is a very good personal friend of mine and has had to endure comments like that from people who judge without knowing the full story. I dunno.. if I had lost Tommy at birth, I would be devasted and hearing about this woman and how she did nothing to prevent it would make me even more upset at her. Again, how do you *know* she did nothing to prevent it? Complications arise during labour and birth for many reasons. A breech birth can be safer than a managed delivery or a scheduled c/s, both of which have their own inherent risks. Jean |
#26
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Sad story
On Fri, 9 Jul 2004 08:50:37 -0400, "Jenny D"
wrote: but then again I might just have mucked up the snipping as usual! She killed her child; she's a murderer. You ****ing bitch. Megan -- Seoras David Montgomery, 7 May 2003, 17 hours: sunrise to sunset (homebirth) To e-mail use: megan at farr-montgomery dot com |
#27
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Sad story
On Fri, 9 Jul 2004 15:40:38 -0400, "Jenny D"
wrote: but then again I might just have mucked up the snipping as usual! I agree with you again. And if she would have gone to the hospital, I bet that baby would have lived. Yes, of course, it may still have died in hospital but at least she would have done all that she could for him/her. I cannot believe you are saying that. You have no idea to know whether it is true or not. It may well be completely untrue. Not all babies would survive if only they were born in hospital. In fact hospital protocols *kill* babies every now and then. Some babies are safer at born at home. Megan -- Seoras David Montgomery, 7 May 2003, 17 hours: sunrise to sunset (homebirth) To e-mail use: megan at farr-montgomery dot com |
#28
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Sad story
"Jenny D" wrote in message
.. . How in the world could she think she was making the right decision. What era does she think we live it? It's the 21st centure and despite how "natural" you want to be, you cannot ignore the doctores and dozens of qualified midwives. She had to have been mentally retarted. Or severely traumatized. There are a couple women on this board who have had very upsetting traumatizing hospital births, or sexual abuse issues in their past, and are pretty clear and adamant that they will home birth their next babies, and some may even want an unassisted home birth. They have real reasons for this, some emotional, some physical, and some both. It wouldn't be my choice, but it is theirs. Now, if more than one doctor told them that they strongly advised against it for the health of their baby, I don't know that would change their minds. I'd be interested in hearing what they have to say, if they are around, and what circumstances might make them change their stance on homebirth, assisted or not. As other people have said, in our culture that is so pro-hospital, so interventionist, and pro-c-section, and so adamantly against home births, it's hard to believe a doctor who says that your baby's health may be in danger. We don't know all of the reason's why the woman in Canada was set on having a home birth, and we don't know all of the circumstances. I'm very sorry for her loss. -- Jamie & Taylor Earth Angel, 1/3/03 Check out Taylor Marlys -- www.MyFamily.com, User ID: Clarkguest1, Password: Guest Become a member for free - go to Add Member to set up your own User ID and Password Check out our Adoption Page at http://home.earthlink.net/~jamielee6 |
#29
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Sad story
"Iuil" wrote in message
... "Jenny D" wrote She killed her child; she's a murderer. I really hope that some of our regular posters aren't reading this. If you are, then (((((mega-hugs)))). "Jenny D" wrote in message .. . Why would you be concerned Jean? Are there any poster here who have failed to listen to EVERY midwife they spoke to and then hired one illegally to give birth at home to a breached baby? Because there are people on this group, like me, who have terminated a much wanted pregnancy due to various physical or genetic abnormalities. Because there are people on this group who had abortions when they were younger. Because there are people on this group whose babies died during or after birth. -- Jamie & Taylor Earth Angel, 1/3/03 Check out Taylor Marlys -- www.MyFamily.com, User ID: Clarkguest1, Password: Guest Become a member for free - go to Add Member to set up your own User ID and Password Check out our Adoption Page at http://home.earthlink.net/~jamielee6 |
#30
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Sad story
: Sadly the baby had major complications during delivery and passed away.
: How : sad. : : Sad and so unnecessary. Unfortunately, it's these types of stories that : people remember and think of when they hear the words homebirth and midwife. : : : JennP. I confess to being one of those women. I would NEVER consider homebirth. ~Carol Ann Mom to Morgan 3.24.04 http://tinyurl.com/2l78p Pictures |
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