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Need your advice/help for dealing with a 3-yr old's temper
Hello Everyone,
Having been reading this forum for a while. I have found out this forum is so useful. I have found many good advices here. This is my first post. I need your help! I have searched for how to deal with tantrum etc. So far, I am still not very successful in handling that. I really need your advice. My son has just become 3 in this March. He goes to a daycare for almost half a year now and is doing well there. He tends to start his "tantrum" when a little tiny thing is not satisfied. Then, I have been using all different strategies to deal with it. It works sometimes, but still far from been successful. Things triggered his temper seem trivial: eg, a banana is broke, a cookie is not in certain shape, I get him a tissue from the wrong tissue box, insist on wearing his pajama pants, etc. I normally would try to give him more care/attention/distraction before he starts the whole thing. I would offer him toys, reading a story, or a hug/hold, talking to him, etc. I also would make sure if he is too tired or too hungry, or if his need is misunderstood. Sometime, I would try let him cry a few minutes, then he wants me to hold etc. I would give in in a few minutes. I would also try a warning, like count to three is the first warning, and tell him, after the third warning, I have to 'punish' him. But almost 7 out 10 times, he would have this kind of throwing tempers before getting ready to school, or going to bed. For example, it took me a hour and a half to get him dressed to school. We skipped breakfast too! I am so exhausted. I know that I should be calm, and not emotional. But it seems that I am not good at dealing with it on a daily basis. I need your suggestion, maybe a little bit support would also be appreciated! |
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Need your advice/help for dealing with a 3-yr old's temper
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Need your advice/help for dealing with a 3-yr old's temper
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#4
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Need your advice/help for dealing with a 3-yr old's temper
Thanks for the quick response. I appreciate that.
I have to admit that I lack of a consistent way of dealing with it. I normally would try to meet his demands, or negotiate with him. If those do not work, I would start using "count 3 warning" or try to ignore him and let him cry. I am wondering if I should use " let him cry" from the beginning, be firm. It seems this do not work well combined with negotiation. |
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Need your advice/help for dealing with a 3-yr old's temper
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#6
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Need your advice/help for dealing with a 3-yr old's temper
wrote in message ... Hello Everyone, Having been reading this forum for a while. I have found out this forum is so useful. I have found many good advices here. This is my first post. I need your help! I have searched for how to deal with tantrum etc. So far, I am still not very successful in handling that. I really need your advice. My son has just become 3 in this March. He goes to a daycare for almost half a year now and is doing well there. He tends to start his "tantrum" when a little tiny thing is not satisfied. Then, I have been using all different strategies to deal with it. It works sometimes, but still far from been successful. Things triggered his temper seem trivial: eg, a banana is broke, a cookie is not in certain shape, I get him a tissue from the wrong tissue box, insist on wearing his pajama pants, etc. The idea I got from How to Talk ... around the banana issue would be enormous and silly empathy. MAN it must be a bummer to have a broken banana! I wish you had a whole one. I wish you had two! No I wish you had a whole rocket ship FULL of broken bananas. I normally would try to give him more care/attention/distraction before he starts the whole thing. I would offer him toys, reading a story, or a hug/hold, talking to him, etc. I also would make sure if he is too tired or too hungry, or if his need is misunderstood. Sometime, I would try let him cry a few minutes, then he wants me to hold etc. I would give in in a few minutes. I would also try a warning, like count to three is the first warning, and tell him, after the third warning, I have to 'punish' him. But almost 7 out 10 times, he would have this kind of throwing tempers before getting ready to school, or going to bed. For example, it took me a hour and a half to get him dressed to school. We skipped breakfast too! I am so exhausted. I know that I should be calm, and not emotional. But it seems that I am not good at dealing with it on a daily basis. I need your suggestion, maybe a little bit support would also be appreciated! In the final analysis, if whatever prevention has not worked, and tantrum has begun in earnest, you remove him from the situation. And tell him when he is calm he can rejoin the group. Rinse and repeat. |
#7
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Need your advice/help for dealing with a 3-yr old's temper
Thanks for the advices!
I am now wondering if this belongs to some type of "terrible two" phase. It never really occurs to me before. I realize that I need to set out some clear rules and then stick to them. Something like "positive discipline"? But it took me some time to realize that. At first, I just do not understand why he likes to do that. Now I think it is time to set the limits on certain behavior. Of course, I know lots of care/ attention is necessary. I also tend to be a good listener to his kind of "complaint " about broken bananas. I do need more and more patience though. |
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Need your advice/help for dealing with a 3-yr old's temper
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Need your advice/help for dealing with a 3-yr old's temper
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