reasons I've heard for not breastfeeding

CY writes:

: Ah, Larry, always the voice of reason

Ohmigod! I've been called a lot of things, but I am going
to have to frame this one. :-)

Larry

"Donna" wrote in message ...
"Elitsirk" wrote in message
om...

I plan to bf my baby for as long as possible, but I have to ask: are
you hearing this one from SAHM's or working moms? I wonder because as
I've thought through the process for pumping once I go back to work, I
am afraid that it will be terribly inconvenient (I still plan to try,
though...). Between the time it will take out of my day, to the fact
that the only 2 rooms in the entire office that don't have uncovered
windows (not windows to the outside, but windows into the office) are
the 2, tiny, one-seater bathrooms that I'd have to wheel a chair into,
to the fact that I'm only 1 of 2 women of childbearing age (and the
only one who's planning to have children at all), I'm thinking that
the whole pumping thing may be VERY awkward to do.

It can be, but it's also possible. I pumped at work (in various offices and
in various situations - I'm self-employed, so when I am on the road, I never
knew what my situation was going to be), so I might be able to help - or at
least to let you know what worked for me. I pumped in conference rooms,
private offices, bathrooms (not my favorite place, but do-able), airplane
restrooms... (going through security with a breast pump was always a
treat - I usually had to explain what it was to the pre-TSA security people.
rolls eyes


And what if I have to work late and didn't have enough milk put away?

Well, if you get into a habit of regular pumping, that shouldn't happen.
Start stockpiling bags during your maternity leave, and when you go back,
make a schedule to pump for ten minutes every two hours, at least to start.
I think that will keep you supplied. Also, if worst comes to worst, an
emergency stash of formula isn't a terrible thing, you know?

And then there's the fear that I'll be sent on a business trip without
much advanced notice (it doesn't happen frequently, but it does
happen...usually we trip plans are figured out less than a week before
we go)--what if I don't have enough time to pump sufficient milk
before I go,

Well, if you are pumping regularly, and you have a stash built up from your
maternity leave (which is easy to do, btw - just plan on pumping twice a day
during your leave. By the end you will have an enormous supply built up)..
You can keep pumping while you are on the road, and bring it back to freeze.
I've done this. It's inconvenient to be sure, but very do-able.

or if I find it difficult to impossible to continue
pumping during off-site meetings.

About 8 weeks after my daughter's birth, I had to do a two day training
session for a brand new client, in Connecticut (I live in Florida). I
brought my pump, and a couple of freezer bags, and at the beginning of the
meeting, I took my trainer aside and explained that I was a nursing mother,
and that I needed to have a place to pump. She found me an office and was
very accommodating. Was it embarrassing? A bit. Actually, quite a bit.
But again, very feasible.

Or, better yet, if I try to explain
to my boss that I can't go on a trip and it ends up reflecting poorly
on my review or I get passed over for a promotion for being unable to
perform job duties. Or worse yet, I get fired for refusing an
important trip....not likely but still a fear.

Why do you think you are going to have to refuse a trip? What are your
specific concerns? I traveled a lot while nursing last year. I'd like to
help, if I can.


Oh yeah, from what I've been reading, the better breast pumps for
daily use run somewhere around $250-300. I guess compared to several
months of formula, that might even out in the end. I do still have
the fear that I'll pay for the expensive pump, and then end up having
to wean the baby to formula anyway and will have wasted a lot of money
that we don't really have to waste.

Will your hospital rent you a pump? Ours does, and the rental fee is about
25 dollars a month. If it turns out that you end up weaning, you can cancel
the rental. And if you make it to a year, you won't be spending a whole lot
more than you would for a purchase.

*sigh* It's good to hear so much encouragement for women to bf, as I
agree that it's absolutely the best thing possible for babies. I just
wonder sometimes how well some bf-advocates really understand the
fears and/or realities that many women face when it comes to the
logistics of it all. Please consider that when you think you are
hearing "whiney" excuses from other mothers.

Well said.

Donna

Yes-- what she said. I'm a lawyer and travelled on business a number
of times during my 16 months of pumping, including a trip to Asia from
the US. My work didn't suffer and I managed to pump in empty offices,
jury rooms (unoccupied, of course!), cars, closets, LAX, hotel
offices, on airplanes, manufacturing plants and various and sundry
other places. It takes some planning, sure. But it is doable, and even
gets easier as you go along. Security folks and janitors can be your
best friends during travel-- tell them you have to pump milk for your
baby and they will often find a way to give you a private place that
meets your needs. And if you are in a situation that you think will
just be waaay too embarassing, you can always use the old "I need a
smoke break" line! I also found the pumpmoms group to be really
helpful.

Kristi

On Tue, 2 Mar 2004 15:24:35 -0500, "Donna"
wrote:

Do you not see the difference between discussion and insult? Look at other
posters, say, Circe, or Nan, or Daye, or Linz who, iirc, all feel very
strongly about breastfeeding or bottle feeding, but who are getting their
points across without slugging people over the head with their views.

Thank you, Donna! I'm certainly trying not slug anyone over the head!
--
Linz
YB: 4.5 months, 16lbs 6oz

"Circe" wrote
Jess ended up relactating because her baby kept
breastmilk down and wound up being a very outspoken advocate for
breastfeeding as a result.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with being an outspoken advoate of
breastfeeding, and I am glad they are out there, because these days most
women I know personally don't breastfeed (the ones who do are in the
minority), and doctors don't push it, they ask you what you want. So it's
good to know the benefits, that's what made me decide to choose to
breastfeed.

It's just those who are judgemental, in your face, and in your business, and
express strong opinions that go BEYOND advocacy, that go more toward "You
are making inferior decisions" and argue with you that you don't have a
valid reason for your decision etc, that get on my nerves Advocacy is a
GOOD thing.

Jill

On Tue, 02 Mar 2004 22:48:12 -0500, Kathy Cole
wrote:

The facts aren't a judgment, they're just the facts.

I think the problem is *how* the facts are delivered.

--
Daye
Momma to Jayan and Leopold
See Jayan and Leo: http://www.aloofhosting.com/jayleo/
Updated 28 Feb 2004

On Wed, 03 Mar 2004 10:18:37 -0500, Ericka Kammerer
wrote:

I think the moral of the story is that if you
don't want your decision opened for debate, don't
open the door by putting your reasoning out there
for everyone to comment on it ;-)

Excellent advice, as ususal!

--
Daye
Momma to Jayan and Leopold
See Jayan and Leo: http://www.aloofhosting.com/jayleo/
Updated 28 Feb 2004

On Wed, 3 Mar 2004 09:17:57 -0700, Michelle J. Haines
wrote:

In article ,
says...

I have the balls to say: I chose to formula feed because I hated
breastfeeding. I began to resent my daughter. For us, it was the
best decision. She had breastmilk for 6 weeks, and I am glad of it.
However, the long and the short of it was breastfeeding was beginning
to affect the way I felt about my child.

FWIW, backs some years ago when there was a Breastfeeding Myths FAQ
going around, and everyone was taking turns with various questions, I
did the "I've been sexually abused and have body issues, and I'm not
sure I can breastfeed." issue.

I know that you aren't saying that I was sexually abused, but I wanted
to clarify this. I was never sexually abused. That was not my issue
with breastfeeding.

--
Daye
Momma to Jayan and Leopold
See Jayan and Leo: http://www.aloofhosting.com/jayleo/
Updated 28 Feb 2004

On Wed, 3 Mar 2004 08:24:50 -0800, "Circe" wrote:

That said, I also feel it's important to correct misinformation. It's a
difficult balance to strike.

I correct misinformation about breastfeeding as well.

A friend of mine who breastfeeds was worried about her milk supply
during a growth spurt. However, she wasn't letting the baby have very
much access to the breast. She told me, "I only let the baby feed
every 2 - 2.5 hours." My reaction was, "Why on earth are you doing
that? Don't you know that the baby is going through a growth spurt
and needs to spend more time on the breast." She gave me some lame
excuse about why she didn't want to do more (I don't remember the
exact reason), and I explained to her about how she needed to have the
baby there so that her breasts would produce more milk, etc.


--
Daye
Momma to Jayan and Leopold
See Jayan and Leo: http://www.aloofhosting.com/jayleo/
Updated 28 Feb 2004

In article ,
says...

I know that you aren't saying that I was sexually abused, but I wanted
to clarify this. I was never sexually abused. That was not my issue
with breastfeeding.

I can't make a point to save my life these days.

I was trying to say that I'm supportive of formula feeding for
serious emotional reasons.

Michelle
Flutist

--
Drift on a river, That flows through my arms
Drift as I'm singing to you
I see you smiling, So peaceful and calm
And holding you, I'm smiling, too
Here in my arms, Safe from all harm
Holding you, I'm smiling, too
-- For Xander [9/22/98 - 2/23/99]

On Wed, 3 Mar 2004 17:56:39 -0700, Michelle J. Haines
wrote:

In article ,
says...

I know that you aren't saying that I was sexually abused, but I wanted
to clarify this. I was never sexually abused. That was not my issue
with breastfeeding.

I can't make a point to save my life these days.

I was trying to say that I'm supportive of formula feeding for
serious emotional reasons.

Michelle, I knew exactly what you were saying. However, I didn't want
someone to think that I was sexually abused. Your point came in loud
and clear to me.

--
Daye
Momma to Jayan and Leopold
See Jayan and Leo: http://www.aloofhosting.com/jayleo/
Updated 28 Feb 2004