A Parenting & kids forum. ParentingBanter.com

If this is your first visit, be sure to check out the FAQ by clicking the link above. You may have to register before you can post: click the register link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below.

Go Back   Home » ParentingBanter.com forum » alt.support » Single Parents
Site Map Home Authors List Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read Web Partners

Ex's



 
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old May 13th 04, 11:55 PM
hdbabe
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default Ex's

Here's the dilemma - My boyfriend and I have a business together, it's a
web based business. Lately things have been picking up, unfortunatly I
work a full time job(this was supposed to be part time,
when-I-can-get-to-it kind of web-based hobby). So here's the dilemma;
Because it's gotten busier(which is good), he decided to bring in
help...his ex-girlfriend. I have a huge problem with it..imagine that! He
didn't tell me about it until the day she started. He's not paying her
yet, she just happens to have the free time and nothing else to do during
the day. I have expressed that I am adamently against this. I would love
to go work full time on this, but I can't do it for free. So, oh great
wise ones, what would you do? What would be the best way to handle this,
without ruining our relationship? It hurts so much to know that she is
there working with him. I trust him, I just don't trust her. She's very
manipulative.

  #2  
Old May 14th 04, 05:36 AM
quietguy
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default Ex's

Hi there hdbabe

hdbabe wrote:

Here's the dilemma - My boyfriend and I have a business together,


Are you sure about this? If one of you is making important decisions about
the business without consulting or discussing it with the other, it doesn't
sound like a real business partnership.

....So here's the dilemma;
Because it's gotten busier(which is good), he decided to bring in
help...his ex-girlfriend.


The keywords that ring some alarm bells for me are "he decided" - as Kate
notes, it should have been something like 'WE discussed and WE decided"

He didn't tell me about it until the day she started. ...... I trust him,
I just don't trust her. She's very
manipulative.


I sort of wonder about the basis on which you place your trust in this man -
while of course everyone has their own standards, for me his actions would
not be considered as trustworthy. And some might see his action in
presenting you with the 'deed done' as manipulative.

On the basis of what you write it seems that it might be helpful for your
future relationship with this man to have some talks about how you both want
the relationship to work, what values you share, and, were it me in your
position, how soon is he going to explain to that ex that the situation is
not workable.

Good luck

David



  #3  
Old May 14th 04, 12:41 PM
Tiffany
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default Ex's


"hdbabe" wrote in message
lkaboutsupport.com...
Here's the dilemma - My boyfriend and I have a business together, it's a
web based business. Lately things have been picking up, unfortunatly I
work a full time job(this was supposed to be part time,
when-I-can-get-to-it kind of web-based hobby). So here's the dilemma;
Because it's gotten busier(which is good), he decided to bring in
help...his ex-girlfriend. I have a huge problem with it..imagine that! He
didn't tell me about it until the day she started. He's not paying her
yet, she just happens to have the free time and nothing else to do during
the day. I have expressed that I am adamently against this. I would love
to go work full time on this, but I can't do it for free. So, oh great
wise ones, what would you do? What would be the best way to handle this,
without ruining our relationship? It hurts so much to know that she is
there working with him. I trust him, I just don't trust her. She's very
manipulative.


This sounds familiar. You been here before?

Doesn't sound like much of partnership to me. If you don't want to 'ruin'
the relationship and you trust him, leave it alone. You can ask nicely for
him to find someone else who will work for free but that is unlikely he
would find someone. If you trust him but not her, what do you think she will
do, drug him then take him to bed?

T


  #4  
Old May 14th 04, 02:33 PM
V
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default Ex's


"hdbabe" wrote in message
lkaboutsupport.com...
Here's the dilemma - My boyfriend and I have a business together, it's a
web based business. Lately things have been picking up, unfortunatly I
work a full time job(this was supposed to be part time,
when-I-can-get-to-it kind of web-based hobby). So here's the dilemma;
Because it's gotten busier(which is good), he decided to bring in
help...his ex-girlfriend. I have a huge problem with it..imagine that! He
didn't tell me about it until the day she started. He's not paying her
yet, she just happens to have the free time and nothing else to do during
the day. I have expressed that I am adamently against this. I would love
to go work full time on this, but I can't do it for free. So, oh great
wise ones, what would you do? What would be the best way to handle this,
without ruining our relationship? It hurts so much to know that she is
there working with him. I trust him, I just don't trust her. She's very
manipulative.


I would be upset that I did not have a hand in the decision. I surely would
not like that she happens to be his ex. I think I would see if there could be
someone else to assist. That is too much of a strain on a relationship and
shame on him for not thinking of your feelings.
V


  #5  
Old May 14th 04, 02:34 PM
V
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default Ex's


"Tiffany" wrote in message
...

"hdbabe" wrote in message
lkaboutsupport.com...
Here's the dilemma - My boyfriend and I have a business together, it's a
web based business. Lately things have been picking up, unfortunatly I
work a full time job(this was supposed to be part time,
when-I-can-get-to-it kind of web-based hobby). So here's the dilemma;
Because it's gotten busier(which is good), he decided to bring in
help...his ex-girlfriend. I have a huge problem with it..imagine that! He
didn't tell me about it until the day she started. He's not paying her
yet, she just happens to have the free time and nothing else to do during
the day. I have expressed that I am adamently against this. I would love
to go work full time on this, but I can't do it for free. So, oh great
wise ones, what would you do? What would be the best way to handle this,
without ruining our relationship? It hurts so much to know that she is
there working with him. I trust him, I just don't trust her. She's very
manipulative.


This sounds familiar. You been here before?

Doesn't sound like much of partnership to me. If you don't want to 'ruin'
the relationship and you trust him, leave it alone. You can ask nicely for
him to find someone else who will work for free but that is unlikely he
would find someone. If you trust him but not her, what do you think she will
do, drug him then take him to bed?

T



There might not be drugs needed.
V


  #6  
Old May 15th 04, 04:14 PM
xkatx
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default Ex's


"Tiffany" wrote in message
...

"hdbabe" wrote in message
lkaboutsupport.com...
Here's the dilemma - My boyfriend and I have a business together, it's a
web based business. Lately things have been picking up, unfortunatly I
work a full time job(this was supposed to be part time,
when-I-can-get-to-it kind of web-based hobby). So here's the dilemma;
Because it's gotten busier(which is good), he decided to bring in
help...his ex-girlfriend. I have a huge problem with it..imagine that!

He
didn't tell me about it until the day she started. He's not paying her
yet, she just happens to have the free time and nothing else to do

during
the day. I have expressed that I am adamently against this. I would love
to go work full time on this, but I can't do it for free. So, oh great
wise ones, what would you do? What would be the best way to handle this,
without ruining our relationship? It hurts so much to know that she is
there working with him. I trust him, I just don't trust her. She's very
manipulative.


This sounds familiar. You been here before?


My first thoughts...

snip

--
A: Because it messes up the order in which people normally read text.
Q: Why is top-posting such a bad thing?
A: Top-posting.
Q: What is the most annoying thing on usenet?


  #7  
Old May 18th 04, 05:40 PM
aXis Computers & Communications
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default Ex's



--
NEED A DATE? (Find singles/couples near you!)
http://acc2.dynip.com:1000/match/index2.htm
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Looking for loans?
http://acc2.dynip.com:1000/loan/index.htm
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
The pregnant pages are now online

http://acc2.dynip.com:1000/preg/index.htm



"hdbabe" wrote in message
lkaboutsupport.com...
Here's the dilemma - My boyfriend and I have a business together, it's a
web based business. Lately things have been picking up, unfortunatly I
work a full time job(this was supposed to be part time,
when-I-can-get-to-it kind of web-based hobby). So here's the dilemma;
Because it's gotten busier(which is good), he decided to bring in
help...his ex-girlfriend. I have a huge problem with it..imagine that! He
didn't tell me about it until the day she started. He's not paying her
yet, she just happens to have the free time and nothing else to do during
the day. I have expressed that I am adamently against this. I would love
to go work full time on this, but I can't do it for free. So, oh great
wise ones, what would you do? What would be the best way to handle this,
without ruining our relationship? It hurts so much to know that she is
there working with him. I trust him, I just don't trust her. She's very
manipulative.



  #8  
Old May 19th 04, 12:12 AM
ACC17901.COM
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default Ex's



--
-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Looking to find a match/hookup/sex partner?

http://acc17901.com:1000/match/index.html




"hdbabe" wrote in message
lkaboutsupport.com...
Here's the dilemma - My boyfriend and I have a business together, it's a
web based business. Lately things have been picking up, unfortunatly I
work a full time job(this was supposed to be part time,
when-I-can-get-to-it kind of web-based hobby). So here's the dilemma;
Because it's gotten busier(which is good), he decided to bring in
help...his ex-girlfriend. I have a huge problem with it..imagine that! He
didn't tell me about it until the day she started. He's not paying her
yet, she just happens to have the free time and nothing else to do during
the day. I have expressed that I am adamently against this. I would love
to go work full time on this, but I can't do it for free. So, oh great
wise ones, what would you do? What would be the best way to handle this,
without ruining our relationship? It hurts so much to know that she is
there working with him. I trust him, I just don't trust her. She's very
manipulative.



  #9  
Old June 1st 04, 04:49 PM
hdbabe
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default Ex's - Update

We talked, I cried...He's decided that he needs to maintain a 'personal
relationship' with her. I'm not sure what to make of it that. She's the
grandmother of a child he's raising. The child is not related to my
boyfriend in any biological way. Long story. I guess boyfriend believes
that if he doesn't maintain a 'personal relationship', she'll jump ship as
a grandparent. Personally, I say 'Look out below!'. I have decided to keep
a distance from the business for now, until the emotions cool down.
Doesn't mean I won't show up and surprise 'em. Gotta keep 'em on thier
toes. Wish me luck. I have a feeling this relationship has just about
reached an end. Time to move on..thanks for the advice all.

  #10  
Old June 2nd 04, 03:42 AM
V
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default Ex's - Update


"hdbabe" wrote in message
lkaboutsupport.com...
We talked, I cried...He's decided that he needs to maintain a 'personal
relationship' with her. I'm not sure what to make of it that. She's the
grandmother of a child he's raising. The child is not related to my
boyfriend in any biological way. Long story. I guess boyfriend believes
that if he doesn't maintain a 'personal relationship', she'll jump ship as
a grandparent. Personally, I say 'Look out below!'. I have decided to keep
a distance from the business for now, until the emotions cool down.
Doesn't mean I won't show up and surprise 'em. Gotta keep 'em on thier
toes. Wish me luck. I have a feeling this relationship has just about
reached an end. Time to move on..thanks for the advice all.


Good thinking.
V


 




Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT +1. The time now is 10:30 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2022, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright 2004-2022 ParentingBanter.com.
The comments are property of their posters.