How to stop him?

"Janet" wrote in message
...
They should have named this group alt.mom.is.always.wrong! All you
people that are attacking me seem to think that my daughters sperm
donor is some kind of knight in shining armor! I will not develop a
relationship with this asshole even though I think he wants that.

Referring to the man you chose to have a child with as a "sperm donor" and
"asshole" just reflects back on you and the choices you made in picking your
daugther's father and your casual approach to sexual activity. The message
that goes out to the child is she is flawed because she is 1/2 the product
of her father.

It's
bad enough that I have to put up with him coming over and pretend that
I like him for my daughters sake. He is NOT a dad. He is just doing
this to get revenge for me filing for child support. He is nothing
more than an overgrown playmate for my daughter.

Father involvement is a key ingredient in children's healthy development.
Fathers engage their children in different types of activites than mothers.
When children are young, fathers are more likely to engage their children in
play activities. Mothers tend to spend more time in caregiving activites.
You are complaining about normal, routine ways fathers interact with their
children.

I am not going to
stand by while he drags her out of the house without fighting him
every way I can. It's not like she is a normal child. She has
emotional problems that will be made much worse if he is allowed to do
this.

Then you should insist on professional mediation regarding any
custody/visitation decisions affecting the child. The parenting plan time
court proceeding you have objected to is the right place to raise your
issues. But a professional evaluation will focus on the child's best
interests and not just your personal opinions about what is going on.

I can see that I'm getting no help or understanding in this
group. I'm done.

Too bad. The advice you got here was to get off the "how to stop him" crap
and see the value of how to encourage his involvement in the parent/child
relationship.

Is it my imagination or are you ignoring posts that WERE helpfull??

Must not want to hear it..... so be it.

Tiffany


"Janet" wrote in message
...
They should have named this group alt.mom.is.always.wrong! All you
people that are attacking me seem to think that my daughters sperm
donor is some kind of knight in shining armor! I will not develop a
relationship with this asshole even though I think he wants that. It's
bad enough that I have to put up with him coming over and pretend that
I like him for my daughters sake. He is NOT a dad. He is just doing
this to get revenge for me filing for child support. He is nothing
more than an overgrown playmate for my daughter. I am not going to
stand by while he drags her out of the house without fighting him
every way I can. It's not like she is a normal child. She has
emotional problems that will be made much worse if he is allowed to do
this. I can see that I'm getting no help or understanding in this
group. I'm done.

On Sat, 9 Dec 2006 07:20:27 -0800, "Chris" wrote:


"ghostwriter" wrote in message
ups.com...

Janet wrote:
How do you people jump to these conclusions? I do NOT have control
issues and I'm not getting rich off my daughter. I only asked for the
support to help pay for her needs. And for the record I'm not fat or
lazy! The child support amount has already been set so this is not
about that. I just don't see how an almost total stranger can be
allowed to force a child to go alone with him. As I've already said,
she does not like him. I know she'll fight him if he comes to get her.
I'll have a video camera rolling so that I can show the judge if he
gets rough with her! I just can't understand why he'd even want to do
that to her in the first place if he's such a loving father.

He is her father, he has every right to pick her up and carry her out
of your house if it is necessary. He has every right to spank her if
she resists going with him. Nothing changes the fact that he is her
FATHER, not a stranger however much you wish it. If he has not
surrendered his parental right, willingly or otherwise, it is not the
place for a CHILD to tell her PARENT that they cant be a PARENT. She is
a child, her desires only really matter on the choices that her
parents(PLURAL) decide to allow her. He may very well not be as good a
parent as you are, but that doesnt somehow void his legal rights. If
he is paying and making an honest attempt to know and care for his
daughter then your little girl is just going to have to deal with it.

This is the fault of you and him, for being foolish enough to get
pregnant and not able to make the relationship work. Now your daughter
gets to suffer for your mistakes. The mature choice for you would be
to develop a relationship with her father that minimizes the conflict
and to keep any conflict away from where she will see it. When he shows
up you have to make it clear that your daughter doesnt have a choice
and that YOU will punish her if she doesnt listen to her father.
Frankly the visits in your house were likley very akward if not
hostile, so I am not surpised she doesnt like him.

BED, MADE, LIE and grow up.

Well put!

Apparently, this woman is of the feminazi belief that the importance,
rights, etc. of a mother trumps those of a father by default; that a child
has a right to a mother but NOT a father. That may be what her government
people claim, but they have yet to support such position with any
reasoning................ ANY!


Ghostwriter

On Thu, 7 Dec 2006 10:55:49 -0800, "Chris" wrote:


"Bob Whiteside" wrote in message
...

"Janet" wrote in message
...
My exboyfriend and I had a little girl in 1999. He took no
interest
in
her until I filed for child support a year ago. Now that I filed
for
support he wants to see her all the time. She is very
uncomfortable
around him and I have my doubts about him as well. I just got a
notice
of a hearing for him wanting to establish forced parenting time!
She
hardly knows this man. She doesn't even like seeing him at my
house.
Can he just come in and take her out of here that way? She is
seeing a
therapist for emotional issues and I'm afraid that this will set
her
back if she is forced to go visiting him. I told him he could see
her
over here but he says that isn't good enough. Is there any way I
can
stop him? Will the court make her see him? I can't bear the
thought
of
her being dragged out of the house kicking and screaming. It will
break my heart. Would they really allow that to happen?

Thanks for your help.

Parenting time plans are used to establish CS awards. CS can be set
administratively and then get court approval. Parenting time plans
require
separate approval and can only be set by the courts.

I'm sure that she is well aware of this. That's why she's trying to
line her
fat lazy pockets with the maximum amount of free cash.
The day she drops her "child support" lawsuit is the day that I will
believe
that it's not about stealin' his money. , but only about keeping the
child
fatherless.


Your child's father is not doing anything unusual.

From the tone of your original post it sounds like you might have
some
control issues.

"Might"?

Since the two of you had a child together your lives will
be intertwined forever through the child. Get used to it and stop
trying
to
drive her father away.

Perhaps he isn't a knight in shining armor, Janet, but he is your child's
father. Do you really think that his money is ok, but he isn't? Do you
want your child to absorb the attitude that you use someone to get what you
want, then cast them aside because they no longer meet your "standards"? Do
you want her to grow up believin that she is 1/2 you and 1/2 asshole?
Because if you continue to give her the message that her father is an
asshole, and not worth having a relationship with, that is exactly what she
will believe. He is trying to be a part of her life, and you are making it
as difficult as you can. Nobody said anything about you having a
relationship with him--other than as parents of the same child. THAT
relationship is there, no matter what you do. YOU have the power to make
this easy or hard--nobody else has that power. So, what message are you
going to give your child about herself?

BTW, if you do force him to walk away in absolute frustration, are you going
to tell your daughter that if he really loved her he would have fought
harder for her--so he really is a jerk?

"Janet" wrote in message
...
They should have named this group alt.mom.is.always.wrong! All you
people that are attacking me seem to think that my daughters sperm
donor is some kind of knight in shining armor! I will not develop a
relationship with this asshole even though I think he wants that. It's
bad enough that I have to put up with him coming over and pretend that
I like him for my daughters sake. He is NOT a dad. He is just doing
this to get revenge for me filing for child support. He is nothing
more than an overgrown playmate for my daughter. I am not going to
stand by while he drags her out of the house without fighting him
every way I can. It's not like she is a normal child. She has
emotional problems that will be made much worse if he is allowed to do
this. I can see that I'm getting no help or understanding in this
group. I'm done.

On Sat, 9 Dec 2006 07:20:27 -0800, "Chris" wrote:


"ghostwriter" wrote in message
oups.com...

Janet wrote:
How do you people jump to these conclusions? I do NOT have control
issues and I'm not getting rich off my daughter. I only asked for the
support to help pay for her needs. And for the record I'm not fat or
lazy! The child support amount has already been set so this is not
about that. I just don't see how an almost total stranger can be
allowed to force a child to go alone with him. As I've already said,
she does not like him. I know she'll fight him if he comes to get her.
I'll have a video camera rolling so that I can show the judge if he
gets rough with her! I just can't understand why he'd even want to do
that to her in the first place if he's such a loving father.

He is her father, he has every right to pick her up and carry her out
of your house if it is necessary. He has every right to spank her if
she resists going with him. Nothing changes the fact that he is her
FATHER, not a stranger however much you wish it. If he has not
surrendered his parental right, willingly or otherwise, it is not the
place for a CHILD to tell her PARENT that they cant be a PARENT. She is
a child, her desires only really matter on the choices that her
parents(PLURAL) decide to allow her. He may very well not be as good a
parent as you are, but that doesnt somehow void his legal rights. If
he is paying and making an honest attempt to know and care for his
daughter then your little girl is just going to have to deal with it.

This is the fault of you and him, for being foolish enough to get
pregnant and not able to make the relationship work. Now your daughter
gets to suffer for your mistakes. The mature choice for you would be
to develop a relationship with her father that minimizes the conflict
and to keep any conflict away from where she will see it. When he shows
up you have to make it clear that your daughter doesnt have a choice
and that YOU will punish her if she doesnt listen to her father.
Frankly the visits in your house were likley very akward if not
hostile, so I am not surpised she doesnt like him.

BED, MADE, LIE and grow up.

Well put!

Apparently, this woman is of the feminazi belief that the importance,
rights, etc. of a mother trumps those of a father by default; that a child
has a right to a mother but NOT a father. That may be what her government
people claim, but they have yet to support such position with any
reasoning................ ANY!


Ghostwriter

On Thu, 7 Dec 2006 10:55:49 -0800, "Chris" wrote:


"Bob Whiteside" wrote in message
...

"Janet" wrote in message
...
My exboyfriend and I had a little girl in 1999. He took no
interest
in
her until I filed for child support a year ago. Now that I filed
for
support he wants to see her all the time. She is very
uncomfortable
around him and I have my doubts about him as well. I just got a
notice
of a hearing for him wanting to establish forced parenting time!
She
hardly knows this man. She doesn't even like seeing him at my
house.
Can he just come in and take her out of here that way? She is
seeing a
therapist for emotional issues and I'm afraid that this will set
her
back if she is forced to go visiting him. I told him he could see
her
over here but he says that isn't good enough. Is there any way I
can
stop him? Will the court make her see him? I can't bear the
thought
of
her being dragged out of the house kicking and screaming. It will
break my heart. Would they really allow that to happen?

Thanks for your help.

Parenting time plans are used to establish CS awards. CS can be
set
administratively and then get court approval. Parenting time plans
require
separate approval and can only be set by the courts.

I'm sure that she is well aware of this. That's why she's trying to
line her
fat lazy pockets with the maximum amount of free cash.
The day she drops her "child support" lawsuit is the day that I will
believe
that it's not about stealin' his money. , but only about keeping the
child
fatherless.


Your child's father is not doing anything unusual.

From the tone of your original post it sounds like you might have
some
control issues.

"Might"?

Since the two of you had a child together your lives will
be intertwined forever through the child. Get used to it and stop
trying
to
drive her father away.

Janet wrote:
They should have named this group alt.mom.is.always.wrong! All you
people that are attacking me seem to think that my daughters sperm
donor is some kind of knight in shining armor! I will not develop a
relationship with this asshole even though I think he wants that. It's
bad enough that I have to put up with him coming over and pretend that
I like him for my daughters sake. He is NOT a dad. He is just doing
this to get revenge for me filing for child support. He is nothing
more than an overgrown playmate for my daughter. I am not going to
stand by while he drags her out of the house without fighting him
every way I can. It's not like she is a normal child. She has
emotional problems that will be made much worse if he is allowed to do
this. I can see that I'm getting no help or understanding in this
group. I'm done.

Madam, I have been a foster parent for many years. The kids that walk
though my door are often incredible far from NORMAL children, I cannot
imagine a reason to refuse visitation outside of demonstrated risk to
the child's safety. Every judge I have ever worked with (that is a
fairly large number) is going to agree with me. If you can get a
doctor to swear in court that visitation will damage your daughters
mental health, and your ex CANT get a doctor to swear that it wont,
then a judge would likley consider such a move. Thats incredibly
unlikley given that most doctors are aware that kids can adjust to just
about anything.

The birth parents have been a mixed bag of wonderful people and
incredible raving nutjobs. Most however have been otherwise decent
people that allowed their own ignorance and rationizations to destroy
them. If you honestly think its in your best interest to be as far as
possible from you ex you can always agree to drop the child-support in
exchange for him exiting the picture.

A lot of people in this group are hateful because they see their
position (from the fathers view) in your post. I am annoyed because you
say this man is unfit to parent but is fit to pay. You cant take away
HIS legal rights without a reason that can stand up in court, anymore
than he can kidnap his daughter because he thinks you are unfit parent.
The man is likley an otherwise decent guy that goes into asshole mode
around you, just like you are likley a decent lady other than the
raging hatred that comes across when you talk about him. People
unfamiliar with kids often act like big playmates, and are very lax
with rules and boundaries. As a foster parent that suggests to me that
he cares about his daughter and is trying to make sure she loves him
back, by buying the love with attention and a relaxation of rules. Its
a normal, if immature reaction that almost every adult grows out of as
they get more used to parent.

My best suggestion is that you seek an informed unbiased perspective.
Your arguement has been that we dont understand the position, my
response is that you are too biased to make a rational decision.
Arbitration might be the best way to go, since if you can convince an
informed third party that your ex really is what you say he is then you
MIGHT be able to get a judge to reduce his parental rights. But realize
if you come across as hateful to them as you do to us, they may side
with him and INCREASE his parenting role.


I wish the best for your family but pray that both you and dad can get
past your own issues and concentrate on whats best for your daughter in
the long run.

Ghostwrtier






On Sat, 9 Dec 2006 07:20:27 -0800, "Chris" wrote:


"ghostwriter" wrote in message
ups.com...

Janet wrote:
How do you people jump to these conclusions? I do NOT have control
issues and I'm not getting rich off my daughter. I only asked for the
support to help pay for her needs. And for the record I'm not fat or
lazy! The child support amount has already been set so this is not
about that. I just don't see how an almost total stranger can be
allowed to force a child to go alone with him. As I've already said,
she does not like him. I know she'll fight him if he comes to get her.
I'll have a video camera rolling so that I can show the judge if he
gets rough with her! I just can't understand why he'd even want to do
that to her in the first place if he's such a loving father.

He is her father, he has every right to pick her up and carry her out
of your house if it is necessary. He has every right to spank her if
she resists going with him. Nothing changes the fact that he is her
FATHER, not a stranger however much you wish it. If he has not
surrendered his parental right, willingly or otherwise, it is not the
place for a CHILD to tell her PARENT that they cant be a PARENT. She is
a child, her desires only really matter on the choices that her
parents(PLURAL) decide to allow her. He may very well not be as good a
parent as you are, but that doesnt somehow void his legal rights. If
he is paying and making an honest attempt to know and care for his
daughter then your little girl is just going to have to deal with it.

This is the fault of you and him, for being foolish enough to get
pregnant and not able to make the relationship work. Now your daughter
gets to suffer for your mistakes. The mature choice for you would be
to develop a relationship with her father that minimizes the conflict
and to keep any conflict away from where she will see it. When he shows
up you have to make it clear that your daughter doesnt have a choice
and that YOU will punish her if she doesnt listen to her father.
Frankly the visits in your house were likley very akward if not
hostile, so I am not surpised she doesnt like him.

BED, MADE, LIE and grow up.

Well put!

Apparently, this woman is of the feminazi belief that the importance,
rights, etc. of a mother trumps those of a father by default; that a child
has a right to a mother but NOT a father. That may be what her government
people claim, but they have yet to support such position with any
reasoning................ ANY!


Ghostwriter

On Thu, 7 Dec 2006 10:55:49 -0800, "Chris" wrote:


"Bob Whiteside" wrote in message
...

"Janet" wrote in message
...
My exboyfriend and I had a little girl in 1999. He took no interest
in
her until I filed for child support a year ago. Now that I filed
for
support he wants to see her all the time. She is very uncomfortable
around him and I have my doubts about him as well. I just got a
notice
of a hearing for him wanting to establish forced parenting time!
She
hardly knows this man. She doesn't even like seeing him at my
house.
Can he just come in and take her out of here that way? She is
seeing a
therapist for emotional issues and I'm afraid that this will set
her
back if she is forced to go visiting him. I told him he could see
her
over here but he says that isn't good enough. Is there any way I
can
stop him? Will the court make her see him? I can't bear the thought
of
her being dragged out of the house kicking and screaming. It will
break my heart. Would they really allow that to happen?

Thanks for your help.

Parenting time plans are used to establish CS awards. CS can be set
administratively and then get court approval. Parenting time plans
require
separate approval and can only be set by the courts.

I'm sure that she is well aware of this. That's why she's trying to
line her
fat lazy pockets with the maximum amount of free cash.
The day she drops her "child support" lawsuit is the day that I will
believe
that it's not about stealin' his money. , but only about keeping the
child
fatherless.


Your child's father is not doing anything unusual.

From the tone of your original post it sounds like you might have
some
control issues.

"Might"?

Since the two of you had a child together your lives will
be intertwined forever through the child. Get used to it and stop
trying
to
drive her father away.

Janet wrote:
They should have named this group alt.mom.is.always.wrong! All you
people that are attacking me seem to think that my daughters sperm
donor is some kind of knight in shining armor!

He may not be but he IS a parent and has a right to raise his daughter
and there's not one thing short of bearing false witness you can do
about it. YOU made a choice to sleep with him now he has a choice to
cultivate a relationship with his daughter.


I will not develop a
relationship with this asshole even though I think he wants that.

No matter how that may affect your daughter and her future
relationships with men? YOU'RE the asshole kitten. A self-absorbed
asshole

It's
bad enough that I have to put up with him coming over and pretend that
I like him for my daughters sake. He is NOT a dad. He is just doing
this to get revenge for me filing for child support. He is nothing
more than an overgrown playmate for my daughter. I am not going to
stand by while he drags her out of the house without fighting him
every way I can. It's not like she is a normal child. She has
emotional problems that will be made much worse if he is allowed to do
this. I can see that I'm getting no help or understanding in this
group. I'm done.


I could go on and on but I won't... If there was EVER a woman who needs
a beating, it's you



On Sat, 9 Dec 2006 07:20:27 -0800, "Chris" wrote:


"ghostwriter" wrote in message
ups.com...

Janet wrote:
How do you people jump to these conclusions? I do NOT have control
issues and I'm not getting rich off my daughter. I only asked for the
support to help pay for her needs. And for the record I'm not fat or
lazy! The child support amount has already been set so this is not
about that. I just don't see how an almost total stranger can be
allowed to force a child to go alone with him. As I've already said,
she does not like him. I know she'll fight him if he comes to get her.
I'll have a video camera rolling so that I can show the judge if he
gets rough with her! I just can't understand why he'd even want to do
that to her in the first place if he's such a loving father.

He is her father, he has every right to pick her up and carry her out
of your house if it is necessary. He has every right to spank her if
she resists going with him. Nothing changes the fact that he is her
FATHER, not a stranger however much you wish it. If he has not
surrendered his parental right, willingly or otherwise, it is not the
place for a CHILD to tell her PARENT that they cant be a PARENT. She is
a child, her desires only really matter on the choices that her
parents(PLURAL) decide to allow her. He may very well not be as good a
parent as you are, but that doesnt somehow void his legal rights. If
he is paying and making an honest attempt to know and care for his
daughter then your little girl is just going to have to deal with it.

This is the fault of you and him, for being foolish enough to get
pregnant and not able to make the relationship work. Now your daughter
gets to suffer for your mistakes. The mature choice for you would be
to develop a relationship with her father that minimizes the conflict
and to keep any conflict away from where she will see it. When he shows
up you have to make it clear that your daughter doesnt have a choice
and that YOU will punish her if she doesnt listen to her father.
Frankly the visits in your house were likley very akward if not
hostile, so I am not surpised she doesnt like him.

BED, MADE, LIE and grow up.

Well put!

Apparently, this woman is of the feminazi belief that the importance,
rights, etc. of a mother trumps those of a father by default; that a child
has a right to a mother but NOT a father. That may be what her government
people claim, but they have yet to support such position with any
reasoning................ ANY!


Ghostwriter

On Thu, 7 Dec 2006 10:55:49 -0800, "Chris" wrote:


"Bob Whiteside" wrote in message
...

"Janet" wrote in message
...
My exboyfriend and I had a little girl in 1999. He took no interest
in
her until I filed for child support a year ago. Now that I filed
for
support he wants to see her all the time. She is very uncomfortable
around him and I have my doubts about him as well. I just got a
notice
of a hearing for him wanting to establish forced parenting time!
She
hardly knows this man. She doesn't even like seeing him at my
house.
Can he just come in and take her out of here that way? She is
seeing a
therapist for emotional issues and I'm afraid that this will set
her
back if she is forced to go visiting him. I told him he could see
her
over here but he says that isn't good enough. Is there any way I
can
stop him? Will the court make her see him? I can't bear the thought
of
her being dragged out of the house kicking and screaming. It will
break my heart. Would they really allow that to happen?

Thanks for your help.

Parenting time plans are used to establish CS awards. CS can be set
administratively and then get court approval. Parenting time plans
require
separate approval and can only be set by the courts.

I'm sure that she is well aware of this. That's why she's trying to
line her
fat lazy pockets with the maximum amount of free cash.
The day she drops her "child support" lawsuit is the day that I will
believe
that it's not about stealin' his money. , but only about keeping the
child
fatherless.


Your child's father is not doing anything unusual.

From the tone of your original post it sounds like you might have
some
control issues.

"Might"?

Since the two of you had a child together your lives will
be intertwined forever through the child. Get used to it and stop
trying
to
drive her father away.

On Sat, 09 Dec 2006 14:48:01 -0500, Janet wrote:

They should have named this group alt.mom.is.always.wrong! All you
people that are attacking me seem to think that my daughters sperm
donor is some kind of knight in shining armor! I will not develop a
relationship with this asshole even though I think he wants that. It's
bad enough that I have to put up with him coming over and pretend that
I like him for my daughters sake. He is NOT a dad. He is just doing
this to get revenge for me filing for child support. He is nothing
more than an overgrown playmate for my daughter. I am not going to
stand by while he drags her out of the house without fighting him
every way I can. It's not like she is a normal child. She has
emotional problems that will be made much worse if he is allowed to do
this. I can see that I'm getting no help or understanding in this
group. I'm done.

You are disgusting. You remind me of the ex I'm currently having
problems with. You want the money, the control, the time with the
kids. What entitles you to all the goodies while he gets pushed away?

snip

"Tim" wrote in message
...
On Sat, 09 Dec 2006 14:48:01 -0500, Janet wrote:

They should have named this group alt.mom.is.always.wrong! All you
people that are attacking me seem to think that my daughters sperm
donor is some kind of knight in shining armor! I will not develop a
relationship with this asshole even though I think he wants that. It's
bad enough that I have to put up with him coming over and pretend that
I like him for my daughters sake. He is NOT a dad. He is just doing
this to get revenge for me filing for child support. He is nothing
more than an overgrown playmate for my daughter. I am not going to
stand by while he drags her out of the house without fighting him
every way I can. It's not like she is a normal child. She has
emotional problems that will be made much worse if he is allowed to do
this. I can see that I'm getting no help or understanding in this
group. I'm done.

You are disgusting. You remind me of the ex I'm currently having
problems with. You want the money, the control, the time with the
kids. What entitles you to all the goodies while he gets pushed away?

ANY judge will tell you "it's right between her legs".


snip

You are disgusting. You remind me of the ex I'm currently having
problems with. You want the money, the control, the time with the
kids. What entitles you to all the goodies while he gets pushed away?

It's drilled into their heads that the law is on their side, they get all
the money and tax benefits, and we men get to pay woman because some how we
men can't care for a child the same as a woman can.

It's a 50's model of man works and pays while woman stays home and cares for
child.

Jan -

Coming from a mother that wishes her son's father would fall of the face of the earth, you have to stop fighting their relationship. For your daughters well-being she has to like her father. She needs to grow up and know her daddy loves her and she loves him. This will make her whole and keep her strong. ( I of all people know how hard this is) You don't trust him and he wants to have posession of the most precious thing in the world to you. Don't trust him. Question everything. Make him answer. BUT....make sure your daughter knows that you think that having a daddy is the best thing ever.

It's a difficult balance to manage your feelings and your childs. You are taking care of your responsibility and you have owned up to it since the date of conception. They think, oh I'm not ready yet, and get to take their time coming to the decision and then throw their rights in your face. It's a slap in the face of all of the sacrafice and hard-work you have put in. There isn't a "thank you" or a let's work together.

Remember....it doesn't matter what he needs or wants. She needs him and will want him. It will make her whole as an adult and that is what we really want for our chilidren. Don't fight it, but don't trust him either. Keep your daughter the focus and don't let him intimidate or force your daughter into anything she isn't ready for. He wasn't ready for her and it took him time to adjust, why wouldn't he give his little girl the same right.

AS PARENTS WE NEED TO REMEMBER THAT CHILDREN ARE NOT POSESSIONS. WE MADE A MADE THEM AND WE ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR THEM. SOMETIMES LETTING GO OF OUR OWN WANTS AND NEEDS IS WHAT IS BEST FOR THEM. BE A PARENT, NOT A CITIZEN WITH A RIGHT!

Originally Posted by DB

You are disgusting. You remind me of the ex I'm currently having
problems with. You want the money, the control, the time with the
kids. What entitles you to all the goodies while he gets pushed away?

It's drilled into their heads that the law is on their side, they get all
the money and tax benefits, and we men get to pay woman because some how we
men can't care for a child the same as a woman can.

It's a 50's model of man works and pays while woman stays home and cares for
child.

Did you miss the part where she said that he didn't want anything to do with the child in the beginning? We aren't talking about some poor man that started out as a father and just wants to be with his daughter. When men treat the mother's of their children with the respect and decentsy that they deserve, they will have an equal partnership.

He didn't get pushed away, he walked away and stayed away. Own up! Be there! Don't give her a reason to push you away. A mother protecting her child is a powerful thing.