Birthday Parties and Gifts

Need some sage advice.

DS is now 6 months old, and the playmates he's made at the mommy/baby
playgroups are now starting to have birthday parties.

One coming up is on a Friday, and we can't go since I've now returned
to work.

If I've been invited to a wedding and couldn't attend, I always send a
gift. But is the etiquette the same for children's birthday parties?
If we don't attend, we send a gift anyway? It's not a really close
friend, just an acquaintance from a playgroup. Does that matter in
the gift issue?

Thanks,
Robin
DS John - 6 months, 19 pounds and Mommy's little Prince Charming

If you can't go, then no you don't have to send a gift.
--
Sue (mom to three girls)

Usenet Fan wrote in message
m...
Need some sage advice.

DS is now 6 months old, and the playmates he's made at the mommy/baby
playgroups are now starting to have birthday parties.

One coming up is on a Friday, and we can't go since I've now returned
to work.

If I've been invited to a wedding and couldn't attend, I always send a
gift. But is the etiquette the same for children's birthday parties?
If we don't attend, we send a gift anyway? It's not a really close
friend, just an acquaintance from a playgroup. Does that matter in
the gift issue?

Thanks,
Robin
DS John - 6 months, 19 pounds and Mommy's little Prince Charming

Usenet Fan wrote:

If I've been invited to a wedding and couldn't attend, I always send a
gift.

Which is nice, but *NOT* required by etiquette.

But is the etiquette the same for children's birthday parties?
If we don't attend, we send a gift anyway?

It is the same, in that you are not required to
send a gift if you do not attend. If your child knows
the child well and is interested in sending a gift, it
would be okay to do so, but it is not expected.

Best wishes,
Ericka

"Ericka Kammerer" wrote in message
...
Usenet Fan wrote:
... If your child knows
the child well and is interested in sending a gift, it
would be okay to do so, but it is not expected.

...

And there is NO way a 6 month old child is even aware of the other child's
existence.... a good guideline: The number of guests invited to a child's
birthday party should be equal or LESS than the age (in years) of the
birthday child's age.

"Usenet Fan" wrote in message
m...
Need some sage advice.

DS is now 6 months old, and the playmates he's made at the mommy/baby
playgroups are now starting to have birthday parties.

....

Do not worry about it. Send a congrats in a card to the mom... but do not
send a gift. There will be plenty of opportunities later. Your child will
not really even be aware that other children exist until he is at least 2
years old.

Plus... I have found with 3 kids... the house fills up with TOO many toys!
Personally I am a fan of books as gifts.

"Usenet Fan" wrote in message
m...
If I've been invited to a wedding and couldn't attend, I always send a
gift. But is the etiquette the same for children's birthday parties?


In my experience, its NOT like a wedding. If you don't go to the party,
you don't need to send a gift.

However, if it were a good friend, then I'd send a gift anyway (but you said
it isn't a good friend, so I wouldn't bother).

"HCN" wrote in message
news:RBtzc.92823$3x.71454@attbi_s54...

"Usenet Fan" wrote in message
m...
Need some sage advice.

DS is now 6 months old, and the playmates he's made at the mommy/baby
playgroups are now starting to have birthday parties.

...

Do not worry about it. Send a congrats in a card to the mom... but do not
send a gift. There will be plenty of opportunities later. Your child
will
not really even be aware that other children exist until he is at least 2
years old.

Plus... I have found with 3 kids... the house fills up with TOO many toys!
Personally I am a fan of books as gifts.


I agree! We just have one child and more toys then we know what to do with
not only that but my husband and I have not purchased any! I have told the
multiple grandparents that educational toys/ movies/ games and music Cds are
welcome and too many toys will be regifted I also welcome books and
cloths.. hehe you never turn down baby cloths

Tori

--
Bonnie 3/20/02
Anna or Xavier due 10/17/04

HCN wrote:

Your child will
not really even be aware that other children exist until he is at least 2
years old.

I agree that there's no need to send a gift, and
I agree the 6mo child isn't going to care about giving
or receiving gifts, but I certainly disagree that kids
aren't aware of other kids' existence until 2yo! Even
my almost-1yo is quite aware of other kids, recognizes
the ones she knows, and interacts with them differently
from kids she doesn't know. I think the latest research
suggests that even babies are capable of forming relationships
with other kids, though it's not the same sort of friend
relationships they form later.

Best wishes,
Ericka

"Usenet Fan" wrote in message
m...
If I've been invited to a wedding and couldn't attend, I always send a
gift. But is the etiquette the same for children's birthday parties?
If we don't attend, we send a gift anyway? It's not a really close
friend, just an acquaintance from a playgroup. Does that matter in
the gift issue?

I usually send a card, but if I plan to invite their child to my child's
party, I will give a gift.

(Usenet Fan) wrote in message om...


If I've been invited to a wedding and couldn't attend, I always send a
gift. But is the etiquette the same for children's birthday parties?
If we don't attend, we send a gift anyway?

Yikes, should I hope not! Particularly when we're talking about
little kids who may well already be getting more gifts than they
really need. If it's a family who's hard up and you'd like to help
out than a birthday gift might be an unobtrusive way to do so.

Not to go too off-topic, but tonight as I was reading a full-color
photograph board book to my one-year-old I thought of the people I
knew in West Africa who couldn't afford any books at all and what
they'd think of these full color photo books for babies with one word
per page...

Kate
and the Bug, 1 year old
(who got more birthday presents than she needs)