Was I pregnant?

My partner and I spent some time (and money!) going through IVF
but with no success. This finished over a year ago and we are still
trying but attempting to not let it rule our lives.
This month, my period was just over two weeks late. It was much
heavier than normal and I had bad stomach cramps and lower back pain.
It only lasted for 4 days and I continues to have some spotting for
around a week after that. Also, I still had cramps and just felt
generally under the weather and really, really tired.
Last Monday morning, I went to my GP and he said it was probably a

hormone imbalance and gave me some medication to sort it out. Later
that evening, I passed some blood that had darker material in it. My
partner was worried and took me to casualty. The doctor there did a
pregancy test on my urine and told me I was not pregnant and that I
should just rest but get help if I felt worse.
What I really need to know is could I have been pregnant? Could it

have been an early miscarriage? I have read that many women have very
early miscarriages without even knowing it. At least this would mean I

have a chance of actually getting pregnant.
I'm too embarrassed to go back to my GP and ask, I don't want him
to think that I'm just being silly. I know I should have asked at the
hospital but I just felt so exhausted at the time, I just wanted to go
home.
Can anybody help me with this? Has anybody else had similar
experiences? I really need to talk.
Thanks

laura wrote:
My partner and I spent some time (and money!) going through IVF
but with no success. This finished over a year ago and we are still
trying but attempting to not let it rule our lives.
This month, my period was just over two weeks late. It was much
heavier than normal and I had bad stomach cramps and lower back pain.
It only lasted for 4 days and I continues to have some spotting for
around a week after that. Also, I still had cramps and just felt
generally under the weather and really, really tired.
Last Monday morning, I went to my GP and he said it was probably a

hormone imbalance and gave me some medication to sort it out. Later
that evening, I passed some blood that had darker material in it. My
partner was worried and took me to casualty. The doctor there did a
pregancy test on my urine and told me I was not pregnant and that I
should just rest but get help if I felt worse.
What I really need to know is could I have been pregnant? Could it

have been an early miscarriage? I have read that many women have very
early miscarriages without even knowing it. At least this would mean I

have a chance of actually getting pregnant.
I'm too embarrassed to go back to my GP and ask, I don't want him
to think that I'm just being silly. I know I should have asked at the
hospital but I just felt so exhausted at the time, I just wanted to go
home.
Can anybody help me with this? Has anybody else had similar
experiences? I really need to talk.
Thanks

It could be true, or it could be that your period was more painful and
heavier because of a clot (the darker material) being 'stuck' in there
for a while. Whether you were pregnant or not, it's always possible
that you could be in the future. Try not to dwell on the 'ifs', and
continue on your more relaxed attitude to falling pregnant. That is
what seems to work for those who it is meant to happen to. If it
happens again though, save the tissue and you could get it tested to see
if it *was* a pregnancy.

Good luck!

Jo (RM)

"Jo" wrote in message
...
laura wrote:
My partner and I spent some time (and money!) going through IVF
but with no success. This finished over a year ago and we are still
trying but attempting to not let it rule our lives.
This month, my period was just over two weeks late. It was much
heavier than normal and I had bad stomach cramps and lower back pain.
It only lasted for 4 days and I continues to have some spotting for
around a week after that. Also, I still had cramps and just felt
generally under the weather and really, really tired.
Last Monday morning, I went to my GP and he said it was probably a

hormone imbalance and gave me some medication to sort it out. Later
that evening, I passed some blood that had darker material in it. My
partner was worried and took me to casualty. The doctor there did a
pregancy test on my urine and told me I was not pregnant and that I
should just rest but get help if I felt worse.
What I really need to know is could I have been pregnant? Could it

have been an early miscarriage? I have read that many women have very
early miscarriages without even knowing it. At least this would mean I

have a chance of actually getting pregnant.
I'm too embarrassed to go back to my GP and ask, I don't want him
to think that I'm just being silly. I know I should have asked at the
hospital but I just felt so exhausted at the time, I just wanted to go
home.
Can anybody help me with this? Has anybody else had similar
experiences? I really need to talk. Thanks

It could be true, or it could be that your period was more painful and
heavier because of a clot (the darker material) being 'stuck' in there for
a while. Whether you were pregnant or not, it's always possible that you
could be in the future. Try not to dwell on the 'ifs', and continue on
your more relaxed attitude to falling pregnant. That is what seems to
work for those who it is meant to happen to. If it happens again though,
save the tissue and you could get it tested to see if it *was* a
pregnancy.

Good luck!

Jo (RM)

Jo! If you are the same Jo from alt.infertility.pregnancy, you should know
better! (If not, allow me to explain).
The problem with saying things like "Try not to dwell on the 'ifs', and
continue on your more relaxed attitude to falling pregnant. That is what
seems to work for those who it is meant to happen to. "
Is that it implies a couple of things. 1) that women with infertility have
some kind of subconscious control over their infertility (just relax). This
implies it's our "fault" for not getting pregnant. 2) talking about "those
who it is meant to happen to" is also hurtful because it implies that those
with infertility are somehow unworthy of pregnancy.
I'm assuming that if you are the Jo I "know", you had a pregnant brain
moment, and if you are a different Jo you probably just aren't aware of the
sensitivities of women who have been infertile. I just had to address this
post, not to flame, but to point out that these commonly held sayings and
beliefs can be really hurtful.
(Remember when it was acceptable to say to a woman who had just experienced
a miscarriage or infant death that "at least you can have another"..this is
similar.)
To the OP, I don't think you'll ever really know if it was pregnancy or not.
It's possible, but honestly I think unlikely. (IIRC many early m/cs will
still test pos from the HCG levels coming down but not being zero) I wish
you luck on you infertility journey.
Amy
EDD 11/25/05

"laura" wrote in message
oups.com...

snip

This month, my period was just over two weeks late. It was much
heavier than normal and I had bad stomach cramps and lower back pain.
It only lasted for 4 days and I continues to have some spotting for
around a week after that. Also, I still had cramps and just felt
generally under the weather and really, really tired.

snip
What I really need to know is could I have been pregnant? Could it

have been an early miscarriage?
snip

It could have been, but there really is no way of knowing unless you had a
blood test done to check hormone levels. You say you were two weeks late,
did you ever take a pregnancy test?

JennP.

"laura" wrote in message
oups.com...
My partner and I spent some time (and money!) going through IVF
but with no success. This finished over a year ago and we are still
trying but attempting to not let it rule our lives.
This month, my period was just over two weeks late. It was much
heavier than normal and I had bad stomach cramps and lower back pain.
It only lasted for 4 days and I continues to have some spotting for
around a week after that. Also, I still had cramps and just felt
generally under the weather and really, really tired.
Last Monday morning, I went to my GP and he said it was probably a

hormone imbalance and gave me some medication to sort it out. Later
that evening, I passed some blood that had darker material in it. My
partner was worried and took me to casualty. The doctor there did a
pregancy test on my urine and told me I was not pregnant and that I
should just rest but get help if I felt worse.
What I really need to know is could I have been pregnant? Could it

have been an early miscarriage? I have read that many women have very
early miscarriages without even knowing it. At least this would mean I

have a chance of actually getting pregnant.
I'm too embarrassed to go back to my GP and ask, I don't want him
to think that I'm just being silly. I know I should have asked at the
hospital but I just felt so exhausted at the time, I just wanted to go
home.
Can anybody help me with this? Has anybody else had similar
experiences? I really need to talk.
Thanks

I really don't know. I read that 1 in 3 pregnancies are unsuccessful within
the first month because of implantation. Sometimes someone could be
pregnant and have their normal period as expected, yet it could be because
of implantation problems. Often the person doesn't even know it was a
pregnancy because their period came on time or a bit late.
I read that somewhere recently, although I have no proof or links to back it
up, and really don't have the energy to try and search for it again

"laura" wrote in message
oups.com...
My partner and I spent some time (and money!) going through IVF
but with no success. This finished over a year ago and we are still
trying but attempting to not let it rule our lives.
This month, my period was just over two weeks late. It was much
heavier than normal and I had bad stomach cramps and lower back pain.
It only lasted for 4 days and I continues to have some spotting for
around a week after that. Also, I still had cramps and just felt
generally under the weather and really, really tired.
Last Monday morning, I went to my GP and he said it was probably a

hormone imbalance and gave me some medication to sort it out. Later
that evening, I passed some blood that had darker material in it. My
partner was worried and took me to casualty. The doctor there did a
pregancy test on my urine and told me I was not pregnant and that I
should just rest but get help if I felt worse.

I'm sorry you're going through this and that you're having trouble getting
pregnant, that can be heartbreaking :-(

What I really need to know is could I have been pregnant? Could it

have been an early miscarriage? I have read that many women have very
early miscarriages without even knowing it. At least this would mean I

have a chance of actually getting pregnant.

It's really hard to say - I've had similar experiences, and to this day have
no idea if I've ever miscarried. As someone else suggested, you could get
blood hCG levels done, but it would need to be sooner rather than later. I'm
breastfeeding, and I've had this a couple of times - so wacky hormones are a
possibility I'd say. Are you charting your temperatures to see whether
you're ovulating? If you're not, something can usually be done about it, and
it's a good way of knowing if you're pg or not without taking a test. I'm
sure you've BTDT though.

I'm too embarrassed to go back to my GP and ask, I don't want him
to think that I'm just being silly. I know I should have asked at the
hospital but I just felt so exhausted at the time, I just wanted to go
home.
Can anybody help me with this? Has anybody else had similar
experiences? I really need to talk.

If your GP implies you're being silly, which I'm sure he won't, I think you
need a more understanding GP. He should have the time to hear you out and
answer your questions.
I hope you are able to get the problem sorted, and are able to conceive a
healthy pregnancy soon.
(((Laura)))

--
Amy
Mum to Carlos born sleeping 20/11/02,
& Ana born screaming 30/06/04
barton . souto @ clear . net . nz
http://www.freewebs.com/carlos2002/
http://www.babiesonline.com/babies/a/ana%5Fj%5F2004/

laura wrote:
This month, my period was just over two weeks late. It was much
heavier than normal and I had bad stomach cramps and lower back pain.
It only lasted for 4 days and I continues to have some spotting for
around a week after that. Also, I still had cramps and just felt
generally under the weather and really, really tired.

I don't know if you were pregnant; I hope
you were. However, next time your period
is late, take a home pregnancy. A lot
of the home pregnancy tests can tell pregnancy
by 10-11 days past ovulation.

-- Anita --

V. wrote:



Jo! If you are the same Jo from alt.infertility.pregnancy, you should know
better! (If not, allow me to explain).

Nope, different Jo - sorry if I cause offence!

Jo (RM)

"Jo" wrote in message
...
V. wrote:



Jo! If you are the same Jo from alt.infertility.pregnancy, you should
know better! (If not, allow me to explain).

Nope, different Jo - sorry if I cause offence!

Jo (RM)

That's OK! I never gave it a second thought when I said the same things
until I experienced infertility. I think it's one of those things that fly
under your radar until it happens to you or a loved one.
I can't even imagine what horrible things I unwittingly say to others about
issues I know nothing about. I just hope they tell me so I stop.

Thanks,
Amy

On Fri, 13 May 2005 21:41:06 +0800, Jo
wrote:

Whether you were pregnant or not, it's always possible
that you could be in the future. Try not to dwell on the 'ifs', and
continue on your more relaxed attitude to falling pregnant. That is
what seems to work for those who it is meant to happen to.

Ouch. That is a pretty insensitive thing to say to someone who has
fertility problems and has undergone IVF. My daughters were the result
of IVF/ICSI (required because of my multiple fertility problems, not
my inability to "relax"). Were they not "meant to happen" because I
didn't get pregnant on my own?

Relaxing will not fix things like blocked tubes, low sperm count, or
endometriosis.

Sorry, but this is a real sore spot for me. I went through six years
of infertility hell to have my daughters, and still have friends who
are going through it. Infertility causes stress, not the reverse.
Think about it -- if stress were a cause of inability to conceive,
rape and incest victims wouldn't get pregnant.

--
Paula
Mom to Olivia and Cassie (b. 4/8/03 @ 26 weeks)
^Grace^ (b. 5/16/02 d. 5/17/02) and ^Adam^ (b/d. 5/17/02)
and a little BOY due 7/4/05 :-)